*THLrir% 

IP! 

LADY  2F  THE 
DEC2RATKN 


FRANCES  LITTLE 


University   of 

California 

Irvine 


/I 


.w<O 


The 
Lady  of  the  Decoration 


The 
Lady  of  the  Decoration 


By 


Frances  Little,  f>f 

Fa n n ! £      -o /flW // J  MA  c.a :J lay  . ' 


New  York 

The  Century  Co. 

1909 


Copyright,  1906,  by 
THE  CENTURY  Co. 


Published,  April,  iQob 

Printed  February,  1906.  Reprinted  September,  October, 
November,  December  (twice),  1906,  January,  February  (twice), 
March,  April,  May,  June  (twice),  July,  August,  September, 
October,  November,  December  (four  times),  1907,  Jan 
uary,  February,  March,  May.  July,  September.  November, 
1908,  January,  February,  June,  August,  September,  1909. 


THE    DE  VINNE    PRESS 


TO  ALL 

GOOD  SISTERS,   AND  TO    MINE 
IN    PARTICULAR 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 


The  Lady  of  the 
Decoration 


SAN  FEANCISCO,  July  30,  1901. 

My  dearest  Mate: 

Behold  a  soldier  on  the  eve  of  battle ! 
I  am  writing  this  in  a  stuffy  little  hotel 
room  and  I  don't  dare  stop  whistling 
for  a  minute.  You  could  cover  my 
courage  with  a  postage  stamp.  In  the 
morning  I  sail  for  the  Flowery  King 
dom,  and  if  the  roses  are  waiting  to 
strew  my  path  it  is  more  than  they  have 
done  here  for  the  past  few  years. 

When  the  train  pulled  out  from  home 
and  I  saw  that  crowd  of  loving,  tear- 
3 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

ful  faces  fading  away,  I  believe  that 
for  a  few  moments  I  realized  the  ac 
tual  bitterness  of  death !  I  was  leaving 
everything  that  was  dear  to  me  on 
earth,  and  going  out  into  the  dark  un 
known,  alone. 

Of  course  it 's  for  the  best,  the  dis 
agreeable  always  is.  You  are  respon 
sible,  my  beloved  cousin,  and  the  con 
sequences  be  on  your  head.  You 
thought  my  salvation  lay  in  leaving 
Kentucky  and  seeking  my  fortune  in 
strange  lands.  Your  tender  sensibil 
ities  shrank  from  having  me  exposed 
to  the  world  as  a  young  widow  who 
is  not  sorry.  So  you  ''shipped  me 
some-wheres  East  of  Suez"  and  tied 
me  up  with  a  four  years'  contract. 

But,  honor  bright,  Mate,  I  don't  be 
lieve  in  your  heart  you  can  blame  me 
for  not  being  sorry!  I  stuck  it  out 
to  the  last,— faced  neglect,  humilia- 
4 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

tions,  and  days  and  nights  of  anguish, 
almost  losing  my  self-respect  in  my 
effort  to  fulfil  my  duty.  But  when 
death  suddenly  put  an  end  to  it  all, 
God  alone  knows  what  a  relief  it  was  1 

And  how  curiously  it  has  all  turned 
out!  First  my  taking  the  Kinder 
garten  course  just  to  please  you,  and 
to  keep  my  mind  off  things  that  ought 
not  to  have  been.  Then  my  sudden  re 
lease  from  bondage,  and  the  dreadful 
manner  of  it,  my  awkward  position,  my 
dependence,— and  in  the  midst  of  it  all 
this  sudden  offer  to  go  to  Japan  and 
teach  in  a  Mission  school! 

Is  n't  it  ridiculous,  Mate?  Was  there 
ever  anything  so  absurd  as  my  lot  be 
ing  cast  with  a  band  of  missionaries  f 
I,  who  have  never  missed  a  Kentucky 
Derby  since  I  was  old  enough  to  know 
a  bay  from  a  sorrel !  I  guess  old  Sis 
ter  Fate  does  n't  want  me  to  b^  a  one 
5 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

part  star.  For  eighteen  years  I  played 
pure  comedy,  then  tragedy  for  seven, 
and  now  I  am  cast  for  a  character  part. 

Nobody  will  ever  know  what  it  cost 
me  to  come!  All  of  them  were  so  ter 
ribly  opposed  to  it,  but  it  seems  to  me 
that  I  have  spent  my  entire  life  going 
against  the  wishes  of  my  family.  Yet 
I  would  lay  down  my  life  for  any  one 
of  them.  How  they  have  stood  by  me 
and  loved  me  through  all  my  blind 
blunders.  I  'd  back  my  mistakes 
against  anybody  else's  in  the  world! 

Then  Mate  there  was  Jack.  You 
know  how  it  has  always  been  with 
Jack.  When  I  was  a  little  girl,  on  up 
to  the  time  I  was  married,  after  that 
he  never  even  looked  it,  but  just  stood 
by  me  and  helped  me  like  a  brick.  If 
it  had  n't  been  for  you  and  for  him 
I  should  have  put  an  end  to  myself 
long  ago.  But  now  that  I  am  free, 
6 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

Jack  has  begun  right  where  he  left  off 
seven  years  ago.  It  is  all  worse  than 
useless;  I  am  everlastingly  through 
with  love  and  sentiment.  Of  course 
we  all  know  that  Jack  is  the  salt  of  the 
earth,  and  it  nearly  kills  me  to  give 
him  pain,  but  he  will  get  over  it,  they 
always  do,  and  I  would  rather  for  him 
to  convalesce  without  me  than  with  me. 
I  made  him  promise  not  to  write  me 
a  line,  and  he  just  looked  at  me  in 
that  quiet,  quizzical  way  and  said:  "All 
right,  but  you  just  remember  that  I  'm 
waiting,  until  you  are  ready  to  begin 
life  over  again  with  me." 

Why  it  would  be  a  death  blow  to 
all  his  hopes  if  he  married  me!  My 
widow's  mite  consists  of  a  wrecked  life, 
a  few  debts,  and  a  worldly  notion  that 
a  brilliant  young  doctor  like  himself 
has  no  right  to  throw  away  all  his 
chances  in  order  to  establish  a  small 
7 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

hospital  for  incurable  children.  When 
ever  I  think  of  his  giving  up  that  long- 
cherished  dream  of  studying  in  Ger 
many,  and  buying  ground  for  the  hos 
pital  instead,  I  just  gnash  my  teeth. 

Oh!  I  know  that  you  think  it  is 
grand  and  noble  and  that  I  am  horrid 
to  feel  as  I  do.  Maybe  I  am.  At  any 
rate  you  will  acknowledge  that  I  have 
done  the  right  thing  for  once  in  com 
ing  away.  I  seem  to  have  been  a  gen 
eral  blot  on  the  landscape,  and  with 
your  help  I  have  erased  myself.  In 
the  meanwhile,  I  wish  to  Heaven  my 
heart  would  ossify! 

The  sole  power  that  keeps  me  going 
now  is  your  belief  in  me.  You  have 
always  claimed  that  I  was  worth  some 
thing,  in  spite  of  the  fact  that  I  have 
persistently  proven  that  I  was  not. 
Don't  you  shudder  at  the  risk  you  are 
taking?  Think  of  the  responsibility  of 
8 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

standing  for  me  in  a  Board  of  Missions ! 
I  '11  stay  bottled  up  as  tight  as  I  know 
how,  but  suppose  the  cork  should  fly? 

Poor  Mate,  the  Lord  was  unkind 
when  he  gave  me  to  you  for  a  cousin. 

Well  it  's  done,  and  by  the  time  you 
get  this  I  will  probably  be  well  on  my 
sea-sick  way.  I  can't  trust  myself  to 
send  any  messages  to  the  family.  I 
don't  even  dare  send  my  love  to  you. 
I  am  a  soldier  lady,  and  I  salute  my 
officer. 


ON  SHIP-BOAED.    August  8th,  1901. 

It  's  so  windy  that  I  can  scarcely 
hold  the  paper  down  but  I  '11  make  the 
effort.  The  first  night  I  came  aboard, 
I  had  everything  to  myself.  There 
were  eighty  cabin  passengers  and  I 
was  the  only  lady  on  deck.  It  was  very 
rough  but  I  stayed  up  as  long  as  I 
9 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

could.  The  blue  devils  were  swarm 
ing  so  thick  around  me  that  I  did  n't 
want  to  fight  them  in  the  close  quar 
ters  of  my  state-room.  But  at  last  I 
had  to  go  below,  and  the  night  that  fol 
lowed  was  a  terror.  Such  a  storm 
raged  as  I  had  never  dreamed  of,  the 
ship  rocked  and  groaned,  and  the  wa 
ter  dashed  against  the  port-holes;  my 
bag  played  tag  with  my  shoes,  and  my 
trunk  ran  around  the  room  like  a  rat 
hunting  for  its  hole.  Overhead  the 
shouts  of  the  captain  could  be  heard 
above  the  answering  shouts  of  the  sail 
ors,  and  men  and  women  hurried 
panic-stricken  through  the  passage. 

Through  it  all  I  lay  in  the  upper 
berth  and  recalled  all  the  unhappy 
nights  of  the  past  seven  years;  disap 
pointment,  heartache,  disillusionment, 
disgust;  they  followed  each  other  in 
silent  review.  Every  tender  memory 
10 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

and  early  sentiment  that  might  have 
lingered  in  my  heart  was  ruthlessly 
murdered  by  some  stronger  memory 
of  pain.  The  storm  without  was  noth 
ing  to  the  storm  within,  I  felt  indifferent 
as  to  the  fate  of  the  vessel.  If  she 
floated  or  if  she  sank,  it  was  one  and 
the  same  to  me. 

When  morning  came  something  had 
happened  to  me.  I  don't  know  what 
it  was,  but  my  past  somehow  seemed 
to  belong  to  someone  else.  I  had  taken 
a  last  farewell  of  all  the  old  burdens, 
and  I  was  a  new  person  in  a  new  world. 

I  put  on  my  prettiest  cap  and  my 
long  coat  and  went  up  on  deck.  Oh, 
my  dear,  if  you  could  only  have  seen 
the  sight  that  greeted  me!  It  was  the 
limpest,  sickest  crowd  I  ever  encoun 
tered!  They  were  pea-green  with  a 
dash  of  yellow,  and  a  streak  of  black 
under  their  eyes,  pale  around  the  lips 
11 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

and  weak  in  their  knees.  There  was 
only  one  other  woman  besides  myself 
who  was  not  sick,  and  she  was  a  mis 
sionary  with  short  hair,  and  a  big 
nose.  She  was  going  around  with  some 
tracts  asking  everybody  if  they  were 
Christians.  Just  as  I  came  up  she 
tackled  a  big,  dejected  looking  for 
eigner  who  was  huddled  in  a  corner. 

"Brother,  are  you  a  Christian?" 

"No,  no,"  he  muttered  impatiently. 
"I  'ma  Norwegian." 

Now  what  that  man  needed  was  a 
cocktail,  but  it  was  not  for  me  to  sug 
gest  it. 

At  table  I  am  in  a  corner  with  three 
nice  old  gentlemen  and  one  young 
German.  They  are  great  on  story-tell 
ing,  and  I  Ve  told  all  of  mine,  most  of 
yours  and  some  I  invented.  One  of  the 
old  gentlemen  is  a  missionary ;  when  he 
found  that  I  was  distantly  connected 
12 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

with  the  fold  he  immediately  called  me 
"Dear  Sister".  If  I  were  at  home  I 
should  call  him  "Dear  Pa",  but  I  am 
on  my  good  behavior. 

The  eating  is  fairly  good,  only  some 
times  it  is  so  hot  with  curry  and  spice 
that  it  nearly  takes  my  breath.  My 
little  Chinese  waiter  is  entirely  too  so 
licitous  for  my  comfort.  No  amount 
of  argument  will  induce  him  to  leave 
my  plate  until  I  have  finished,  after  a 
few  mouthfuls  he  whisks  it  away  and 
brings  me  another  relay.  After  press 
ing  upon  me  dishes  of  every  kind,  he 
insists  on  my  filling  up  all  crevices 
with  nuts  and  raisins,  and  after  I  have 
eaten,  and  eaten,  he  looks  hurt,  and 
says  regretfully:  "Missy  sickee,  no 
eatee." 

There  is  one  other  person,  who  is 
just  as  solicitous.  The  little  German 
watches  my  every  mouthful  with  round 
13 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

solemn  eyes,  and  insists  upon  serving 
everything  to  me.  He  looks  bewildered 
when  anyone  tells  a  funny  story,  and 
sometimes  asks  for  an  explanation. 
He  has  been  around  the  world  twice, 
and  is  now  going  to  China  for  three 
years  for  the  Society  of  Scientific  Re 
search.  He  seems  to  think  I  am  the 
greatest  curio  he  has  yet  encountered 
in  his  travels. 

The  chief  excitement  of  our  trip  so 
far  has  been  the  day  in  Honolulu.  I 
wanted  to  sing  for  joy  when  we  sighted 
land.  The  trees  and  grass  never 
looked  so  beautiful  as  they  did  that 
morning  in  the  brilliant  sunshine.  It 
took  us  hours  to  land  on  account  of  the 
red  tape  that  had  to  be  unwound,  and 
then  there  was  an  extra  delay  of  which 
I  was  the  innocent  cause.  The  quar 
antine  doctor  was  inspecting  the  ship, 
and  after  I  had  watched  him  examine 
the  emigrants,  and  had  gotten  my  feel- 
14 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

ings  wrought  up  over  the  poor  miser 
able  little  children  swarming  below,  I 
found  a  nice  quiet  nook  on  the  shelter 
deck  where  I  snuggled  down  and 
amused  myself  watching  the  native 
boys  swim.  The  water  on  their  bronze 
bodies  made  them  shine  in  the  sunlight, 
and  they  played  about  like  a  shoal  of 
young  porpoises.  I  must  have  stayed 
there  an  hour,  for  when  I  came  down 
there  was  considerable  stir  on  board. 
A  passenger  was  missing  and  we  were 
being  held  while  a  search  of  the  ship 
was  made.  I  was  getting  most  ex 
cited  when  the  purser,  who  is  the 
sternest  and  best  looking  man  you  ever 
saw,  came  up  and  pounced  upon  me. 
"Have  you  been  inspected?"  he  de 
manded,  eyeing  me  from  head  to  foot. 
"Not  any  more  than  at  present,"  I 
answered  meekly.  "Come  with  me," 
he  said. 

I  asked  him  if  he  was  going  to  throw 
15 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

me  overboard,  but  he  was  too  full  of 
importance  to  smile.  He  handed  me 
over  to  the  doctor  saying:  "Here  is 
the  young  woman  that  caused  the  de 
lay."  Young  woman,  indeed!  but  I 
was  to  be  crushed  yet  further  for  the 
doctor  looked  over  his  glasses  and  said : 
"Now  how  did  we  miss  that?" 

But  on  to  Honolulu!  I  don't  wonder 
people  go  wild  over  it.  It  is  as  if  all 
the  artists  in  all  the  world  had  spilled 
their  colors  over  one  spot,  and  Nature 
had  sorted  them  out  at  her  own  sweet 
will.  I  kept  wondering  if  I  had  died  and 
gone  to  Heaven!  Marvelous  palms, 
and  tropical  plants,  and  all  hanging  in 
a  softly  dreaming  silence  that  went  to 
my  head  like  wine. 

I  started  out  to  see  the  city,  with 
two  old  ladies  and  a  girl  from  South 
Dakota,  but  Dear  Pa  and  Little  Ger 
many  joined  the  party.  Oh!  Mate 
16 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

frow  I  longed  for  you!  I  wanted  to  tie 
all  those  frousy  old  freaks  up  in  a  hard 
knot  and  pitch  them  into  the  sea!  The 
girl  from  South  Dakota  is  a  little  bet 
ter  than  the  rest,  but  she  wears  a 
jersey! 

There  are  real  tailor-made  people  on 
board,  but  I  don't  dare  associate  with 
them.  They  play  bridge  most  of  the 
time  and  if  I  hesitated  near  them  I  'd 
be  lost.  I  '11  play  my  part,  never  fear, 
but  I  hereby  swear  that  I  will  not 
dress  it! 


STILL  ON  BOAED.    August  18th. 

Dear  Mate: 

I  am  writing  this  in  my  berth  with 
the  curtains  drawn.  No  I  am  not  a  bit 
sea-sick,  just  popular.  One  of  the  old 
ladies  is  teaching  me  to  knit,  the  short- 
haired  missionary  reads  aloud  to  me> 
17 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

the  girl  from  South  Dakota  keeps  my 
feet  covered  up,  and  Dear  Pa  and 
Little  Germany  assist  me  to  eat. 

The  captain  has  had  a  big  bathing 
tank  rigged  up  for  the  ladies,  and  I 
take  a  cold  plunge  every  morning.  It 
makes  me  think  of  our  old  days  at  the 
cottage  up  at  the  Cape.  Did  n't  we 
have  a  royal  time  that  summer  and 
were  n't  we  young  and  foolish?  It 
was  the  last  good  time  I  had  for  many 
a  long  day— but  there,  none  of  that! 

Last  night  I  had  an  adventure,  at 
least  it  was  next  door  to  one.  I  was 
sitting  up  on  deck  when  Dear  Pa  came 
by  and  asked  me  to  walk  with  him. 
After  several  rounds  we  sat  down  on 
the  pilot  house  steps.  The  moon  was 
as  big  as  a  wagon  wheel  and  the  whole 
sea  flooded  with  silver,  while  the  flying 
fishes  played  hide  and  seek  in  the  shad 
ows.  I  forgot  all  about  Dear  Pa  and 
18 


The  Lady  of  the   Decoration 

was  doing  a  lot  of  thinking  on  my  own 
account  when  he  leaned  over  and  said : 

"I  hope  you  don't  mind  talking  to 
me.  I  am  very,  very  lonely."  Now 
I  thought  I  recognized  a  grave  symp 
tom,  and  when  he  began  to  tell  me 
about  his  dear  departed,  I  knew  it  was 
time  to  be  going. 

"You  have  passed  through  it,"  he 
said.  "You  can  sympathize." 

I  crossed  my  fingers  in  the  dark. 
"We  are  both  seeking  a  life  work  in 
a  foreign  field— ' '  he  began  again,  but 
just  here  the  purser  passed.  He  almost 
stumbled  over  us  in  the  dark  and  when 
he  saw  me  and  my  elderly  friend,  he 
actually  smiled! 

Don't  you  dare  tell  Jack  about  this, 
I  should  never  hear  the  last  of  it. 

Can  you  realize  that  I  am  three  whole 
weeks  from  home?  I  do,  every  second 
of  it.  Sometimes  when  I  stop  to  think 
19 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

what  I  am  doing  my  heart  almost 
bursts!  But  then  I  am  so  used  to  the 
heartache  that  I  might  be  lonesome 
without  it;  who  knows? 

If  I  can  only  do  what  is  expected  of 
me,  if  I  can  only  pick  up  the  pieces  of 
this  smashed-up  life  of  mine  and  patch 
them  into  a  decent  whole  that  you  will 
not  be  ashamed  of,  then  I  will  be  con 
tent. 

The  first  foreign  word  I  have 
learned  is  '  *  Alohaoe ' ',  I  think  it  means 
"my  dearest  love  to  you."  Any  how 
I  send  it  laden  with  the  tenderest  mean 
ing.  God  bless  and  keep  you  all,  and 
bring  me  back  to  you  a  wiser  and  a 
gladder  woman. 


KOBE.  August  18th,  1901. 

Actually  in  Japan!     I  can  scarcely 
believe  it,  even  with  all  this  strange 
20 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

life  going  on  about  me.  This  morning 
a  launch  came  out  to  the  steamer 
bringing  Miss  Lessing  and  Miss  Dixon, 
the  two  missionaries  in  whose  school 
I  am  to  work.  When  I  saw  them,  I 
must  confess  that  my  heart  went  down 
in  my  boots !  Theirs  must  have  done 
the  same  thing,  for  we  stood  looking 
at  each  other  as  awkwardly  as  if  we 
belonged  to  different  planets.  The 
difference  began  with  our  heels  and 
extended  right  on  up  to  the  crown  of 
our  hats.  Even  the  language  we  spoke 
seemed  different,  and  when  I  faced  the 
prospect  of  living  with  such  utter 
strangers,  I  wanted  to  jump  overboard ! 

My  fellow  passengers  suddenly  be 
came  very  dear,  I  clung  to  everything 
about  that  old  steamer  as  the  last  link 
that  bound  me  to  America. 

As  we  came  down  the  gang  plank,  I 
was  introduced  to  "Brother  Mason" 
21 


The  Lady   of  the  Decoration 

and  "Brother  White",  and  we  all 
came  ashore  together.  I  felt  for  all 
the  world  like  a  convict  sentenced  to 
four  years  in  the  penitentiary.  When 
we  reached  the  Hotel,  I  fled  to  my 
room  and  flung  myself  on  the  bed.  I 
knew  I  might  as  well  have  it  out.  I 
cried  for  two  hours  and  thirty-five  min 
utes,  then  I  got  up  and  washed  my  face 
and  looked  out  of  the  window. 

It  was  all  so  strange  and  picturesque 
that  I  got  interested  before  I  knew  it. 
By  and  by  Miss  Lessing  came  in.  Now 
that  her  hat  was  off  I  saw  that  she  had 
a  very  sweet  face  with  pretty  dark 
hair  and  a  funny  little  twinkle  behind 
her  eyes  that  made  me  think  of  you. 
She  told  me  how  she  had  come  out  to 
Japan  when  she  was  a  young  girl,  and 
how  she  had  built  up  the  school,  and  all 
she  longed  to  do  for  it.  Then  she  said, 
"  Your  coming  seems  like  the  direct  an- 
22 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

swer  to  prayer.  It  has  been  one  of  my 
dearest  dreams  to  have  a  Kindergarten 
for  the  little  ones,  it  just  seems  too 
good  to  he  true!"  And  she  looked  at 
me  out  of  her  nice  shining  eyes  with 
such  gratitude  and  enthusiasm  that  I 
was  ashamed  of  what  I  had  felt. 

After  that  Miss  Dixon  came  up  and 
they  sat  and  watched  me  unpack  my 
trunk.  It  took  me  about  two  minutes 
to  find  out  that  they  were  just  like 
other  women,  fond  of  finery  and  pretty 
things  and  eager  for  news  of  the  out 
side  world.  They  examined  all  the 
dainty  under  clothes  that  sister  had 
made  for  me,  they  marvelled  over  the 
high  heeled  slippers,  and  laughed  at 
the  big  sleeves. 

"Where  are  you  going  to  wear 
all  these  lovely  things?"  asked  Miss 
Dixon.  And  again  my  heart  sank,  for 
even  my  simple  wardrobe,  planned  for 

23 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

the  exigencies  of  school  life,  seemed 
strangely  extravagant  and  out  of  place. 

But  I  want  to  say  right  now,  Mate, 
that  if  I  stay  here  a  thousand  years 
I  '11  never  come  to  jerseys  and  eight- 
year-old  hats!  I  am  going  to  sub 
scribe  to  a  good  fashion  paper,  and  at 
least  keep  within  hailing  distance  of 
the  styles. 

It  is  too  warm  to  go  down  to  the 
school  yet  so  we  are  to  spend  a  week 
in  the  mountains  before  we  start  in  for 
the  fall  term. 

Dear  Pa  and  Little  Germany  have 
been  here  twice  in  three  hours  but  I 
saw  them  first. 

Home  letters  will  not  arrive  until 
next  week,  and  I  can  scarcely  wait  for 
the  time  to  come.  I  keep  thinking  that 
I  am  away  on  a  visit  and  that  I  will  be 
going  back  soon.  I  find  myself  saving 
things  to  show  you,  and  even  starting 
24 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

to  buy  things  to  bring  home.    I  have 
a  good  deal  to  learn,  have  n't  I? 


HIEISAN.  August  28th,  1901 

Fairy-land,  real  true  fairy-land  that 
we  used  to  talk  about  up  in  the  old 
cherry-tree  at  grandmother's!  It  's  all 
so,  Mate,  only  more  bewitching  than  we 
ever  dreamed. 

I  have  been  in  little  villages  that 
dropped  right  out  of  a  picture  book. 
The  streets  are  full  of  queer,  small 
people  who  run  about  smiling,  and 
bowing  and  saying  pretty  things  to 
each  other.  It  is  a  land  where  every 
body  seems  to  be  happy,  and  where 
politeness  is  the  first  commandment. 

Yesterday  we  came  up  the  moun 
tains  in  jinrikishas.  The  road  was 
narrow,  but  smooth,  and  for  over  three 
hours  the  men  trotted  along,  never  halt- 
25 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

ing   or   changing  their   gait   until  we 
stopped  for  lunch. 

There  is  not  much  to  a  Japanese 
house  but  a  roof  and  a  lot  of  bamboo 
poles,  but  everything  is  beautifully 
clean.  Before  we  had  gotten  down, 
several  men  and  women  came  running 
out  and  bowing  and  calling  "Ohayo, 
Ohayo ' '  which  means  ' l  good-morning. ' ' 
They  ran  for  cushions  and  we  were 
glad  enough  to  sit  on  the  low  benches 
and  stretch  ourselves.  Then  they 
brought  us  delicious  tea,  and  gathered 
around  to  see  us  drink  it.  It  seems 
that  light  hair  is  a  great  curiosity  over 
here,  and  mine  proved  so  interesting 
that  they  motioned  for  me  to  take  off 
my  hat,  and  then  they  stood  around 
chattering  and  laughing  at  a  great  rate. 
Miss  Lessing  said  they  wanted  me  to 
take  my  hair  down,  but  would  not  ask 
it  because  of  the  beautiful  arrange- 
26 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

ment.  Shades  of  Blondes !  I  wish  you 
could  have  seen  it!  But  you  have  seen 
it  after  a  hard  set  of  tennis. 

When  we  had  rested  an  hour,  and 
drunk  tea,  and  bowed  and  smiled,  we 
started  out  again,  this  time  in  a  kind 
of  Sedan  chair,  made  of  bamboo  and 
carried  on  a  long  pole  on  the  shoulders 
of  two  men.  Now  I  have  been  up  steep 
places  but  that  trip  beat  anything  I 
ever  saw!  I  felt  like  a  fly  on  a  bald 
man's  head!  We  climbed  up,  up,  up, 
sometimes  through  woods  that  were  so 
dense  you  could  scarcely  know  it  was 
day-time,  and  again  through  stretches 
of  dazzling  sunshine. 

Just  as  I  was  beginning  to  wonder 
what  had  become  of  our  luggage,  we 
passed  four  women  laughing  and  sing 
ing.  Two  of  them  had  steamer  trunks 
on  their  heads,  and  two  carried  huge 
kori.  They  did  not  seem  to  mind  it  in 
27 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

the  least,  and  bowed  and  smiled  us  out 
of  sight. 

Another  two  hours'  climb  brought  us 
to  this  village  of  camps  called  Hieisan. 
There  are  about  forty  Americans  here, 
who  are  camping  out  for  the  summer, 
and  I  am  the  guest  of  a  Dr.  Waring 
and  his  wife  from  Alabama. 

My  tent  is  high  above  everything,  on 
a  great  overhanging  rock,  and  before 
me  is  a  view  that  would  be  a  fit  setting 
for  Paradise.  This  mountain  is  sacred 
to  Buddha,  and  the  whole  of  it  is  thick 
with  temples  and  shrines,  some  of  them 
nobody  knows  how  old. 

I  have  been  trying  to  muster  courage 
to  get  up  at  three  o'clock  in  the  morn 
ing  to  see  the  monkeys  come  out  for 
breakfast.  The  mountains  are  full  of 
them,  but  they  are  only  to  be  seen  at 
that  hour. 

There  are  some  very  pleasant  people 
here,  and  I  have  made  a  number  of 
28 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

friends.  I  am  something  of  a  conun 
drum,  and  curiosity  is  rife  as  to  why  I 
came.  Mrs.  Waring  dresses  me  up  and 
shows  me  off  like  a  new  doll,  and  the 
women  consult  me  about  making  over 
their  clothes. 

I  don't  know  why  I  am  not  perfectly 
miserable.  The  truth  is,  Mate,  I  am 
having  a  good  time !  It  's  nice  to  be 
petted  and  treated  like  a  child.  It  is 
good  to  be  among  plain,  honest  people, 
that  live  out  doors,  and  have  healthy 
bodies  and  minds. 

I  want  to  forget  all  that  I  learned 
about  the  world  in  the  past  seven  years. 
I  want  to  begin  life  again  as  a  girl  with 
a  few  illusions,  even  if  they  are  bor 
rowed  ones.  I  know  too  much  for  my 
years  and  I  'm  determined  to  forget. 

The  home  letters  were  heavenly, 
I  Ve  read  them  limber.  I  '11  answer 
the  rest  to-morrow. 


29 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 


HIROSHIMA.  Sept.  2nd,  1901. 

At  last  after  my  wanderings  I  am 
settled  for  the  winter.  The  school  is  a 
big  structure,  open  and  airy,  and  I  have 
a  nice  room  facing  the  east  where  you 
dear  ones  are.  On  two  sides  tower  the 
mountains,  and  between  them  lies  the 
magical  Inland  Sea.  This  is  a  great 
naval  and  military  station,  and  while 
I  write  I  can  hear  the  bugle  calls  from 
the  parade  grounds. 

I  have  a  pretty  little  maid  to  wait  on 
me  and  I  wish  you  could  see  us  talking 
to  each  other.  She  comes  in,  bows  until 
her  head  touches  the  floor  and  hopes 
that  my  honorable  ears  and  eyes  and 
teeth  are  well.  I  tell  her  in  plain  Eng 
lish  that  I  am  feeling  bully,  then  we 
both  laugh.  She  is  delighted  with  all 
my  things,  and  touches  them  softly 
30 


The  Lady  of  the   Decoration 

saying  over  and  over:  ''It  's  mine  to 
care  for!" 

There  are  between  four  and  five  hun 
dred  girls  in  the  school  and,  until  I  get 
more  familiar  with  the  language,  I  am 
to  work  with  the  older  girls  who  under 
stand  some  English.  You  would  smile 
to  see  their  curiosity  concerning  me. 
They  think  my  waist  is  very  funny  and 
they  measure  it  with  their  hands  and 
laugh  aloud.  One  girl  asked  me  in  all 
seriousness  why  I  had  had  pieces  cut 
out  of  my  sides,  and  another  wanted 
to  know  if  my  hair  used  to  be  black. 
You  see  in  all  this  big  city  I  am  the  only 
person  with  golden  tresses,  and  a  green 
carnation  would  not  excite  more  com 
ment. 

Yesterday  we  went  shopping  to  get 

some  curtains  for  my  room.     Such  a 

crowd    followed    us    that    we    could 

scarcely  see  what  we  were  doing.  When 

31 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

we  went  into  the  stores  we  sat  on  the 
floor  and  a  little  boy  fanned  us  all  the 
time  we  were  making  our  selection, 

Monday,  Miss  Lessing  asked  me  to 
begin  a  physical  culture  class  with  the 
larger  girls  who  are  being  trained  for 
teachers,  so  I  decided  that  the  first  les 
son  would  be  on  skipping.  It  is  an  un 
known  art  in  Japan  and  the  lack  of  it 
makes  the  Kindergarten  work  very 
awkward. 

I  took  fourteen  girls  out  on  the  porch 
and  told  them  by  signs  and  gestures 
to  follow  me.  Then  I  picked  up  my 
skirts,  and  whistling  a  coon-song, 
started  off.  You  never  saw  anything 
to  equal  their  look  of  absolute  astonish 
ment!  They  even  got  down  on  their 
hands  and  knees  to  watch  my  feet.  But 
they  were  game,  and  in  spite  of  their 
tight  kimonos  and  sandalled  feet  they 
made  a  brave  effort  to  follow.  The 
32 


The  Lady  of  the   Decoration 

first  attempt  was  disastrous,  some  fell 
on  their  faces,  some  went  down  on 
their  knees,  and  all  stumbled.  I  did  n't 
dare  laugh  for  the  Japanese  can  stand 
anything  better  than  ridicule.  I  helped 
and  encouraged  and  cheered  them  on 
to  victory.  The  next  day  there  was  a 
slight  improvement,  and  by  the  third 
day  they  were  experts.  I  found  that 
they  had  spent  the  whole  afternoon  in 
practice!  Now  what  do  you  suppose 
the  result  is  I  An  epidemic  of  skipping 
has  swept  over  Hiroshima  like  the 
measles !  Men  women  and  children 
are  trying  to  learn,  and  when  we  go  out 
to  walk  I  almost  have  convulsions  at 
the  elderly  couples  we  pass  earnestly 
trying  to  catch  the  step! 

I  was  so  encouraged  by  this  success 

that  I  taught  the  girls  all  sorts  of  steps 

and  figures,  even  going  so  far  as  to 

teach  them  the  quadrille !    But  my  am- 

33 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

bition  led  me  a  little  too  far.  One  day 
I  came  to  class  with  a  brand  new  step, 
which  I  had  invented  myself.  It  was 
rather  giddy,  but  a  splendid  exercise. 
Well  I  headed  the  line  and  after  the 
girls  had  followed  me  around  the  room 
twice  I  saw  that  they  were  convulsed 
with  laughter!  When  I  asked  what 
was  the  matter,  they  explained  between 
gasps  that  the  step  was  the  principal 
movement  in  the  heathen  dance  given 
during  festivals  to  the  God  of  Beauty! 
My  saints!  Would  n't  some  of  my 
dear  brethren  do  a  turn  if  they  knew? 
Every  afternoon  I  take  about  forty 
of  the  girls  out  for  a  walk.  Our  favor 
ite  stroll  is  along  the  moat  that  sur 
rounds  the  old  castle.  It  is  almost  al 
ways  spilling  over  with  lotus  blossoms. 
The  maidens,  trotting  demurely  along 
in  their  rain-bow  kimonos  and  little 
clicking  sandals  make  a  pretty  picture. 
We  have  to  pass  the  parade  grounds 
34 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

of  the  barracks  where  20,000  soldiers 
are  stationed,  and  I  do  wish  you  could 
see  them  trying  to  be  modest,  and  yet 
peeping  out  of  the  corners  of  their  little 
almond  eyes  in  a  way  which  is  not  pe 
culiar  to  any  particular  country. 

And  the  way  they  imitate  me  makes 
me  afraid  to  breathe  naturally.  This 
thing  of  being  a  shining  example  is 
more  than  I  bargained  for.  It  is  one 
of  the  few  things  in  my  checkered 
career  that  I  have  hitherto  escaped. 

Never  mind  Mate,  I  could  n  't  be  friv 
olous  if  I  wanted  to  down  here.  Kobe 
would  have  proven  fatal,  for  there  are 
many  foreigners  there,  and  the  temp 
tation  to  have  a  good  time  would  have 
been  too  much  for  me.  I  am  rapidly 
developing  into  a  hymn-singing  sister, 
and  the  world  and  the  flesh  and  the 
devil  are  shut  up  in  the  closet.  Let 
us  pray. 


35 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 


October  2nd,  1901. 

At  last,  dear  Mate,  I  am  started  at 
my  own  work  with  the  babies  and  there 
are  n't  any  words  to  tell  you  how  cun 
ning  they  are.  There  are  eighty-five 
high  class  children  in  the  pay  kinder 
garten,  and  forty  in  the  free.  The  lat 
ter  are  mostly  of  the  very  poor  fam 
ilies,  most  of  the  mothers  working  iii 
the  fields  or  on  the  railroads.  There 
are  so  many  pitiful  cases  that  one  longs 
for  a  mint  of  money  and  a  dozen  hands 
to  relieve  them.  One  little  girl  of  six 
comes  every  day  with  her  blind  baby 
brother  strapped  on  her  back.  She  is 
a  tiny  thing  herself  and  yet  that  baby 
is  never  unstrapped  from  her  back  un 
til  night  comes.  When  I  first  saw  her 
old  weazened  face  and  her  eagerness 
to  play,  I  just  took  them  both  in  my 
lap  and  cried! 

36 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

One  funny  thing  I  must  tell  you 
about.  From  the  first  week  that  I  got 
here,  the  children  have  had  a  nickname 
for  me.  I  noticed  them  laughing  and 
nudging  each  other  on  the  street  and 
in  the  school,  and  whenever  I  passed 
they  raised  their  right  hands  in  salute, 
and  gave  a  funny  little  clucking  sound. 
They  seemed  to  pass  the  word  from  one 
to  another  until  every  youngster  in  the 
neighborhood  followed  the  trick.  My 
curiosity  was  aroused  to  such  a  pitch 
that  I  got  an  interpreter  to  investigate 
the  matter.  When  he  came  to  report, 
he  smilingly  touched  my  little  enam 
elled  watch,  the  one  Jack  gave  me 
on  my  16th  birthday,  and  apologeti 
cally  informed  me  that  the  children 
thought  it  was  a  decoration  from  the 
Emperor  and  they  were  saluting  me  in 
consequence !  And  they  have  named 
me  "The  Lady  of  the  Decoration". 
Think  of  it,  I  have  a  title,  and  I  am  ac- 
37 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

tually  looked  up  to  by  these  funny  yel 
low  babies  as  a  superior  being.  They 
forget  it  some  time  though  when  we  all 
get  to  playing  together  in  the  yard. 
We  can 't  talk  to  each  other,  but  we  can 
laugh  and  romp  together,  and  some 
times  the  fun  runs  high. 

I  am  busy  from  morning  until  night. 
The  two  kindergartens,  a  big  training 
class  in  physical  culture,  two  Japanese 
lessons  a  day  and  prayers  about  every 
three  minutes,  don't  leave  many  spare 
hours  for  homesickness.  But  the  long 
ing  is  there  all  the  same,  and  when  I 
see  the  big  steamers  out  in  the  harbor 
and  realize  that  they  are  coaling  for 
home,  I  just  want  to  steal  aboard  and 
stay  there. 

The  language  is  something  awful.    I 

get  my  tongue  in  such  knots  that  I  have 

to  use  a  corkscrew  to  pull  it  straight 

again.     Just  between  you  and  me,  I 

38 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

have  decided  to  give  it  up  and  devote 
my  time  to  teaching  the  girls  to  speak 
English  instead.  They  are  such  re 
sponsive,  eager  little  things,  it  will  not 
be  hard. 

As  for  the  country,  I  would  n't  dare 
to  attempt  a  description.  Sometimes  I 
just  ache  with  the  beauty  of  it  all! 
From  my  window  I  can  see  in  one 
group  banana,  pomegranate,  persim 
mon  and  fig  trees  all  loaded  with  fruit. 
The  roses  are  still  in  full  bloom,  and 
color,  color  everywhere.  Across  the 
river,  the  banks  are  lined  with  pic 
turesque  houses  that  look  out  from  a 
mass  of  green,  and  above  them  are  tea 
houses,  and  temples  and  shrines  so  old 
that  even  the  moss  is  gray,  and  time 
has  worn  away  the  dates  engraved 
upon  the  stones. 

We  spent  yesterday  at  the  • sacred 
Island  of  Miyajima,  which  is  about 
39 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

one  hour's  ride  from  here.  The  dream 
of  it  is  still  upon  me  and  I  wish  I  could 
share  it  with  you.  We  went  over  in  a 
sampan,  a  rude  open  boat  rowed  by 
two  men  in  undress  uniform.  For  half 
an  hour  we  literally  danced  across  the 
sea;  everything  was  fresh  and  spark 
ling,  and  I  was  so  glad  to  be  alive  and 
free,  that  I  just  sang  for  joy.  Miss 
Lessing  joined  in  and  the  boatmen 
kept  time,  smiling  and  nodding  their 
approval. 

The  mountains  were  sky  high,  and 
at  their  base  in  a  small  crescent-shaped 
plain  was  the  village  with  streets  so 
clean  and  white  you  hated  to  walk  on 
them.  We  stopped  at  the  "House  of 
the  White  Cloud"  and  three  little 
maids  took  off  our  shoes  and  replaced 
them  with  pretty  sandals.  The  whole 
house  was  of  cedar  and  ebony  and  bam 
boo  and  it  had  been  rubbed  with  oil 
40 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

until  it  shone  like  satin.  On  the  floor 
was  a  stuffed  matting  with  a  heavy 
border  of  crimson  silk,  and  in  the  cor 
ner  of  the  room  was  a  jar  that  came 
to  my  shoulder,  full  of  wonderfully 
blended  chrysanthemums.  All  the 
rooms  opened  upon  a  porch  which  hung 
directly  above  a  roaring  waterfall,  and 
below  us  a  dozen  steps  away  stretched 
the  sparkling  sea,  full  of  hundreds  of 
sailing  vessels  and  junks. 

In  the  afternoon,  we  wandered  over 
the  island,  visiting  the  old,  old  temples, 
listening  to  the  mysterious  wailing  of 
the  wind  bells,  feeding  the  deer  and 
crane,  and  drinking  in  the  beauty  of  it 
all.  I  felt  like  a  disembodied  spirit, 
traveling  back,  back  over  the  centuries, 
into  dim  forgotten  ages.  The  dead 
seemed  close  about  me,  yet  they 
brought  no  gloom,  for  I  too  was  dead. 
All  afternoon  I  had  the  impression  of 
41 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

trying  to  keep  my  consciousness  from 
drifting  into  oblivion  through  the  gate 
of  this  magical  dream! 

How  you  would  enjoy  it  all,  and  read 
its  deeper  meaning,  which  is  hidden 
from  me.  But  even  if  I  can't  philos 
ophize  like  a  certain  blessed  old  Mate 
of  mine,  I  can  feel  until  every  nerve 
is  a  tingle  with  the  thrill. 

Good  bye  for  a  little  while;  I  've 
stolen  the  time  to  write  you  this,  and 
now  it  behooves  me  to  hustle. 


November  12th,  1901. 

It 's  been  a  long  while  between 
"drinks",  but  I  have  been  waiting  un 
til  I  could  write  a  letter  minus  the 
groans.  The  truth  is  I  have  hit  bottom 
good  and  hard  and  it  is  only  to-day 
that  I  have  come  to  the  surface.  When 
the  exhilaration  of  seeing  all  the  new 
42 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

and  strange  sights  wore  off,  I  began  to 
sink  in  a  sea  of  homesickness  that 
threatened  to  put  an  end  to  the  kinder 
garten  business  for  good  and  all. 

I  worked  like  mad,  and  all  the  time 
I  felt  like  one  of  these  whizzing  rockets 
that  go  rushing  through  the  air  and  die 
out  in  a  miserable  little  fizzle  at  the  end. 
I  can  stand  it  in  the  daytime,  but  at 
night  I  almost  go  crazy.  And  you  have 
no  idea  how  many  women  do  lose  their 
minds  out  here.  Nearly  every  year 
some  poor  insane  creature  has  t^  be 
shipped  home.  You  need  n't  worry 
about  that  though,  if  I  had  mind 
enough  to  lose  I  'd  have  lost  it  long  ago. 
But  to  think  of  all  my  old  ambitions 
and  aspirations  ending  in  the  humble 
task  of  wiping  Little  Japan's  nose! 

I  suppose  you  think  I  am  pulling  for 
the  shore  but  I  am  not.    I  am  steering 
my  little  craft  right  out  in  the  billows 
43 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

It  may  be  dashed  to  smithereens,  and 
it  may  come  safely  home  again,  but  in 
any  case,  I  '11  have  the  consolation  of 
the  Texas  cowboy  that  "I  Ve  done  my 
durndest ! ' ' 

By  the  way,  what  has  become  of 
Jack?  He  need  n't  have  taken  me  so 
literally  as  never  to  send  me  a  mess 
age  even!  You  mentioned  his  having 
been  at  the  Cape  while  you  were  there. 
Was  he  just  as  unsociable  as  ever?  I 
can  see  him  now  lying  flat  on  his  back 
in  the  bottom  of  a  boat  reading  poetry. 
I  hate  poetry,  and  when  he  used  to 
quote  his  favorite  passages  I  made  par 
odies  on  them.  Now  you  were  always 
different.  You  'd  rhapsodize  with  him 
to  his  heart's  content. 

Just  here  I  had  a  lovely  surprise. 

I    looked    out    of    the    window    and 

saw    a    coolie    pull    a    little    wagon 

into  the  yard  and  begin  to  unload.    I 

44 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

could  n't  imagine  what  was  taking 
place  but  pretty  soon  Miss  Dixon  came 
in  with  both  arms  full  of  papers,  pic 
tures,  magazines  and  letters.  It  was 
all  my  mail!  I  just  danced  up  and 
down  for  joy.  I  guess  you  will  never 
know  the  meaning  of  letters  until  you 
are  nine  thousand  miles  from  home. 
And  such  dear  loving  encouraging  let 
ters  as  mine  were!  I  am  going  to  sit 
right  down  and  read  them  all  over 
again. 

November  24th,  1901. 

Clear  sailing  once  more,  Mate!  In 
my  last,  I  remember,  I  was  blowing  the 
fog  horn  pretty  persistently. 

The    letters    from    home    set    me 

straight  again.    If  ever  a  human  being 

was  blessed  with  a  good  family  and 

good  friends  it  is  my  unworthy  self! 

45 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

The  past  week  has  been  unusually 
exciting.  First  we  had  a  wedding  on 
hand.  The  bride  is  a  girl  who  has  been 
educated  in  the  school,  so  of  course  we 
were  all  interested.  Some  time  agor 
the  middle-man,  ,who  does  all  the  ar 
ranging,  came  to  her  father  and  said 
a  young  teacher  in  the  Government 
school  desired  his  daughter  in  mar 
riage.  The  father  without  consulting 
the  girl  investigated  the  suitor's  stand 
ing,  and  finding  it  satisfactory,  said 
yea.  So  little  Otoya  was  told  that  she 
was  going  to  be  married,  and  the 
groom  elect  was  invited  to  call. 

I  was  on  tiptoe  with  curiosity  to 
see  what  would  happen,  but  the  meet 
ing  took  place  behind  closed  doors. 
Otoya  told  me  afterwards  that  she  had 
never  seen  the  young  man  until  he  en 
tered  the  room,  but  they  both  bowed 
three  times,  then  she  served  tea  while 
mother  and  father  talked  to  him. 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

"Did  n't  you  talk  to  him  at  all?"  I 
asked.  She  looked  horrified.  "No, 
that  would  have  been  most  immodest!" 
she  said.  "But  you  peeped  at  him," 
I  insisted.  'She  shook  her  head,  * '  That 
would  have  been  disgrace."  Now  that 
was  three  months  ago  and  she  had  n't 
seen  him  until  Monday  when  they  were 
married. 

At  our  suggestion  they  decided  to 
have  an  American  wedding  and  I  was 
appointed  mistress  of  ceremonies.  It 
was  great  fun,  for  we  had  a  best  man, 
besides  brides-maids  and  flower  girls, 
and  Miss  Lessing  played  the  Wedding 
March  for  them  to  enter.  The  arrange 
ments  were  somewhat  difficult  owing 
to  the  fact  that  the  Japanese  consider 
it  the  height  of  vulgarity  to  discuss 
anything  pertaining  to  the  bride  or  the 
wedding.  They  excused  me  on  the 
ground  that  I  was  a  foreigner. 

The  affair  was  really  beautiful! 
47 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

The  little  bride's  outer  garment  was 
the  finest  black  crepe,  but  under  it, 
layer  after  layer,  were  slips  of  rain 
bow  tinted  cob-web  silk  that  rippled 
into  sight  with  every  movement  she 
made.  And  every  inch  of  her  trousseau 
was  made  from  the  cocoons  of  worms 
raised  in  her  own  house,  and  was  spun 
into  silk  by  her  waiting  maids. 

After  the  excitement  of  the  wedding 
had  subsided,  we  had  a  visitation  from 
forty  Chinese  peers.  They  came  in  a 
cavalcade  of  kuramas,  gorgeously  ar 
rayed,  and  presenting  an  imposing  ap 
pearance.  I  ran  for  the  poker  for  I 
thought  maybe  they  had  come  to  finish 
''Us  Missionaries."  But,  bless  you, 
they  had  heard  of  our  school  and  our 
kindergarten  and  had  come  for  the 
Chinese  Government  to  investigate, 
ways  and  means.  They  made  a  tour 
of  the  school,  ending  up  in  the  kinder- 
48 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

garten.  The  children  were  completely 
overpowered  by  these  black-browed, 
fierce-looking  gentlemen,  but  I  put 
them  through  their  paces.  The  visitors 
were  so  pleased  that  they  stayed  all 
morning  and  signified  their  unqualified 
approval.  When  they  started  to  leave, 
I  asked  the  interpreter  if  their  gracious 
highnesses  would  permit  my  unworthy 
self  to  take  their  honorable  pictures. 

Would  you  believe  it?  Those  old 
fellows  puffed  up  like  pouter  pigeons, 
and  giggled  and  primped  like  a  lot  of 
school  girls !  They  stood  in  a  row  and 
beamed  upon  me  while  I  snapped  the 
kodak.  If  the  picture  is  good,  I  '11  send 
you  one. 

This  morning  I  had  to  teach  Sunday 
School.  I  '11  be  praying  in  public  next. 
I  see  it  coming.  The  lesson  was  ' '  The 
Prodigal  Son",  a  subject  on  which  I 
ought  to  be  qualified  to  speak.  The 
49 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

Japanese  youths  understood  about  one 
word  out  of  three,  but  they  were  giving 
me  close  attention.  I  was  expounding 
with  all  the  earnestness  in  me  when 
suddenly  I  remembered  a  picture  Jack 
used  to  have.  It  was  of  a  lean  little 
calf  tearing  down  the  road,  while  in 
the  distance  was  coming  a  lazy  looking 
tramp.  Underneath  was  the  legend: 

"Run,  bossy,  run, 
Here  comes  the  Prodigal  Son." 

That  settled  my  sermon,  so  I  told 
the  boys  a  bear  story  instead. 

How  I  should  love  to  drop  in  on  you 
to-night  and  sit  on  the  floor  before  the 
fire  and  pow-wow!  I  '11  be  an  awful 
back  number  when  I  come  home,  but 
just  think  how  entertaining  I  '11  be! 
I  have  enough  good  dinner  stories  to 
last  through  the  rest  of  my  life! 

For  heaven's  sake  send  me  some  hat 
pins,  nice  long  ones  with  pretty  heads. 
50 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

And  if  you  are  in  New  York  this  win 
ter  please  get  me  two  bottles  of  that 
violet  extract  that  I  always  use. 

My  dearest  love  to  all,  and  a  hundred 
kisses  to  the  blessed  children  at  home. 
Don't  you  dare  let  them  forget  me. 


November  27th,  1901. 

I  told  you  it  would  come!  My  pro 
phetic  soul  foresaw  it.  I  had  to  lead 
the  prayer  in  chapel  this  morning. 
And  I  play  the  organ  in  Sunday  School 
and  listen  to  two  Japanese  sermons  on 
Sunday. 

I  tell  you,  Mate,  this  part  of  the  work 
goes  sadly  against  the  grain.  They  say 
you  get  used  to  hanging  if  you  just 
hang  long  enough,  so  I  suppose  I  '11 
become  reconciled  in  time. 

You  ask  me  icliy  I  do  these  things. 
Well  you  see  it  's  all  just  like  a  big 
51 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

work  shop,  where  everybody  is  work 
ing  hard  and  cheerfully  and  yet  there 
is  so  much  work  waiting  to  be  done, 
that  you  don 't  stop  to  ask  whether  you 
like  it  or  not. 

I  can't  begin  to  tell  you  of  the  hope 
lessness  of  some  of  the  lives  out  here. 
Just  think  of  it!  Women  working  in 
the  stone  quarries,  and  in  the  sand  pits 
and  on  the  railroads,  and  always  with 
babies  tied  on  their  backs,  and  the  poor 
little  tots  crippled  and  deformed  from 
the  cramped  position  and  often  blind 
from  the  glare  of  the  sun. 

What  I  am  crazy  to  do  now  is  to  open 
another  free  kindergarten  in  one  of  the 
poorest  parts  of  the  city.  It  would 
cost  only  fifty  dollars  to  run  it  a  whole 
year,  and  I  mean  to  do  it  if  I  have  to 
sell  one  of  my  rings.  It  is  just  glorious 
to  feel  that  you  are  actually  helping 
somebody,  even  if  that  somebody  is  a 
52 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

small  and  dirty  tribe  of  Japanese  chil 
dren.  I  get  so  discouraged  and  blue 
sometimes  that  I  don't  know  what  to 
do,  but  when  a  little  tot  comes  up  and 
slips  a  very  soiled  hand  into  mine  and 
pats  it  and  lays  it  against  his  cheek 
and  hugs  it  up  to  his  breast  and  says, 
"Sensei,  Sensei, "  I  just  long  to  take 
the  whole  lot  of  them  to  my  heart  and 
love  them  into  an  education! 

They  don't  know  the  word  love  but 
they  know  its  meaning,  and  if  I  happen 
to  stop  to  pat  a  little  head,  a  dozen 
arms  are  around  me  in  a  minute,  and 
I  am  almost  suffocated  with  affection. 
One  little  fellow  always  calls  me  "Nice 
boy"  because  that  is  what  I  called  him. 

We  are  having  glorious  weather, 
cold  in  doors  but  warm  outside.  The 
chrysanthemums  and  roses  are  still 
blooming,  and  the  trees  are  heavily  la 
den  with  fruit.  The  persimmons  grow 
53 


The  Lady  of  tne  Decoration 

trigger  than  a  coffee  cup  and  the 
oranges  are  tiny  things,  but  both  are  de 
licious.  Chestnuts  are  twice  as  big  as 
ours,  and  they  cook  them  as  a  vege 
table. 

You  '11  be  having  Thanksgiving  soon, 
and  you  will  all  go  up  to  Grand 
mother's,  and  have  a  jolly  time  to 
gether.  Have  them  fix  a  plate  for  me, 
Mate,  and  turn  down  an  empty  glass. 
Nobody  will  miss  me  as  much  as  I  will 
miss  my  poor  little  self. 

What  jolly  Thanksgivings  we  have 
had  together!  The  gathering  of  the 
clans,  the  big  dinner,  and  the  play  at 
night.  Not  exactly  a  play,  was  it,  Mate  ? 
More  of  a  vaudeville  performance  with 
you  as  the  stage  manager,  and  I  as  the 
soubrette.  Do  you  remember  the  last 
reunion  before  I  was  married?  I  mean 
the  time  I  was  Lady  Macbeth  and  gave 
a  skirt  dance,  and  you  did  lovely  stunts 
54 


The  Lady  of  the   Decoration 

from  Grand  Opera.  Have  you  for 
gotten  Jack's  famous  parody  on  "My 
Country  'Tis  of  Thee!" 

"  My  turkey,  'tis  of  thee, 
Sweet  bird  of  cranberry, 
Of  thee  I  sing ! 
I  love  thy  neck  and  wings, 
Legs,  back  and  other  things,"  etc,  etc. 

There  goes  the  bell,  and  here  go  I. 
I  can  appreciate  the  feelings  of  a  fire 
engine ! 


Christmas  Day,  1901. 

Had  somebody  told  you  last  Christ 
mas,  as  we  trimmed  the  big  tree  and 
made  ready  for  the  family  gathering, 
that  this  Christmas  would  find  me  in 
a  foreign  country  teaching  a  band  of 
little  heathens,  would  n't  you  have 
thought  somebody  had  wheels  in  his 
head? 

55 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

And  yet  it  is  true,  and  I  have  only 
to  lift  my  eyes  to  realize  fully  that  I 
am  really  in  the  flowery  kingdom.  The 
plum  blossoms  are  in  full  bloom  and 
the  roses  too,  while  a  thick  frost  makes 
everything  sparkling  white  in  the  sun 
shine.  The  mountains  have  put  on  a 
thin  blue  veil  trimmed  in  silver,  and 
over  all  is  a  turquoise  sky. 

An4  best  of  all,  everybody— I  speak 
figuratively — is  happy.  It  may  be  that 
some  poor  little  waif  is  hungry,  having 
had  only  rice  water  for  breakfast,  it 
may  be  some  sad  hearts  are  beating 
under  the  gay  kimonos,  and  it  may  be, 
Mate  dear,  that  somebody,  a  stranger 
in  a  strange  land,  can:'t  keep  the  tears 
back,  and  is  longing  with  all  her  mind 
and  soul  and  body  for  home  and  her 
loved  ones.  But  never  you  mind,  no 
body  knows  it  but  you  and.  me  and  a 
bamboo  tree! 

56 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

This  afternoon  we  are  going  to  have 
tea  for  the  Mammas  and  Papas,  and 
I  am  going  to  put  on  my  prettiest 
clothes  and  do  my  yellow  locks  in  their 
most  fetching  style. 

I  shall  lock  up  tight,  way  down  deep, 
all  heartaches  and  longings  and  put  on 
my  best  smile  for  these  dear  little 
people  who  have  given  to  me,  a 
stranger,  such  full  measure  of  their 
sympathy  and  friendship,  who,  in  the 
big  service  last  month,  when  giving 
thanks  for  all  the  great  blessings  of 
the  past  year,  named  the  new  Kinder 
garten  teacher  first. 

Do  you  wonder  that  I  am  happy  and 
miserable  and  homesick  and  contented 
all  at  the  same  time? 

The  box  I  sent  home  for  Christmas 

was  a  paltry  offering  compared  to  what 

I  wanted  to  send,  but  the  things  were 

bought   with  the   first   money  I    ever 

57 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

earned.  They  are  packed  in  so  tight 
with  love  that  I  doubt  if  you  ever  get 
them  out. 

Our  Christmas  dinner  was  not  ex 
actly  a  success.  We  invited  all  the 
foreigners  in  Hiroshima,  twelve  in 
number,  and  everybody  talked  a  great 
deal  and  laughed  at  everybody's  stale 
jokes,  and  pretended  to  be  terribly  hi 
larious.  But  there  was  a  pathetic  droop 
to  every  mouth,  and  not  a  soul  referred 
to  home.  Each  one  seemed  to  realize 
that  the  mere  mention  of  the  word 
would  break  up  the  party. 

I  tell  you  I  am  beginning  to  look  with 
positive  reverence  on  the  heroism  of 
some  of  these  people!  Tears  and  re 
grets  have  no  place  here ;  desire,  ambi 
tion,  love  itself  is  laid  aside,  and  only 
taken  out  for  inspection  perhaps  in  the 
dead  hours  of  the  night.  If  heart 
breaks  come,  as  come  they  must,  there 
58 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

is  no  crying  out,  no  rebellion,  just  a 
stiffer  lip  and  a  firmer  grip  and  the 
work  goes  on. 

I  wish  I  was  like  that,  but  I  'm  not. 
If  Nature  had  put  more  time  on  my 
head  and  less  on  my  heart,  she  would 
have  turned  out  a  better  job. 

I  put  a  pipe  in  the  box  for  Jack.  If 
you  think  I  ought  not  to  have  done  it, 
don't  give  it  to  him.  As  old  Charity 
used  to  say,  ''I  don't  want  to  discom- 
boberate  nobody."  Only  I  hope  he 
won't  think  I  am  ungrateful  and  indif 
ferent. 


NAGASAKI.  January  14th,  1902. 

Now  are  n't  you  surprised  at  hear 
ing  from  me  in  Nagasaki?  I  am  cer 
tainly  surprised  at  being  here !  One  of 
the  teachers  at  the  school,Miss  Dixon, 
was  taken  sick  and  had  to  come  here 
59 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

to  see  a  doctor.    I  was  lucky  enough 
to  be  asked  to  come  with  her. 

I  am  so  excited  over  being  in  touch 
with  civilization  again  that  I  can't 
sleep  at  night!  The  transports  and  all 
the  steamers  stop  here,  and  every  type 
of  humanity  seems  to  be  represented. 
This  morning  when  I  went  out  to  mail 
a  letter,  there  were  two  Sikhs  in  uni 
form  in  front  of  me,  at  my  side  was  a 
Russian,  behind  me  two  Chinamen 
and  a  Japanese,  while  a  Frenchman 
stepped  aside  for  me  to  pass,  and  an 
Irishman  tried  to  sell  me  some  veg 
etables  ! 

Miss  Dixon  had  to  go  to  the  Hospital 
for  a  few  days,  though  her  trouble  is 
nothing  serious,  and  I  accepted  an  in 
vitation  from  Mrs.  Ferris,  the  wife  of 
the  American  Consul,  to  spend  a  few 
days  with  her. 

60 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

And  oh!  Mate,  if  you  only  knew 
the  time  I  have  had!  If  I  were  n't  a 
sort  of  missionary-in-law  I  would 
quote  Jack  and  say  it  has  been  "  per 
fectly  damn  gorgeously."  If  you  want 
to  really  enjoy  the  flesh-pots  just  live 
away  from  them  for  six  months  and 
then  try  them! 

The  night  I  came,  the  Ferrises  gave 
me  a  beautiful  dinner,  and  I  wore  even 
ing  dress  for  the  first  time  in  two  years, 
and  was  as  thrilled  as  a  debutante  at 
her  first  ball!  It  was  so  good  to  see 
cut  glass  and  silver,  and  to  hear  dear 
silly  worldly  chatter  that  I  grew  ter 
ribly  frivolous.  Plates  were  laid  for 
twenty,  and  who  do  you  suppose  was 
on  my  right?  The  severe  young  pur 
ser  who  was  on  the  steamer  I  came  over 
in!  His  ship  is  coaling  in  the  harbour 
and  he  is  staying  with  the  Ferrises. 
61 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

who  are  old  friends  of  his.  He  is  so 
solemn  that  he  almost  kills  me.  If  he 
were  n't  so  good  looking  I  could  let 
him  alone,  but  as  it  is  I  can't  help  wor 
rying  the  life  out  of  him. 

The  dinner  was  most  elaborate.  Af 
ter  the  oysters,  came  a  fish  nearly  three 
feet  long  all  done  up  in  sea-weed,  then 
a  big  silver  bowl  was  brought  in  cov 
ered  with  pie-crust.  When  the  carver 
broke  the  crust  there  was  a  flutter  of 
wings,  and  "four  and  twenty  black 
birds"  flew  out.  This  it  seems  was 
done  by  the  Japanese  cook  as  a  sample 
of  his  skill.  All  sorts  of  queer  courses 
followed,  served  in  the  most  unique 
manner  possible. 

After  dinner  they  begged  me  to  sing, 
and  though  I  protested  violently,  they 
got  me  down  at  the  piano.  I  did  n't 
get  up  any  more  until  the  party  was 
over  for  they  made  me  sing  every  song 
62 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

I  knew  and  some  I  did  n 't.  I  sang  some 
things  so  hoary  with  age  that  they  were 
decrepit!  The  purser  so  far  forgot 
himself  as  to  ask  me  to  sing  "My  Bon 
nie  lies  over  the  Ocean" !  I  did  so  with 
great  expression  while  he  looked  pen 
sively  into  the  fire.  Since  then  I  have 
called  him,  "My  Bonnie,"  and  he  hates 
me. 

The  next  day  we  went  out  to  services 
on  board  the  battleship  ; '  Victor. ' '  The 
ship  had  been  on  a  long  cruise  and  we 
were  the  first  American  women  the  of 
ficers  had  seen  for  many  a  long  day. 
They  gave  us  a  rousing  welcome  you 
may  be  sure.  Through  some  mistake 
they  thought  I  was  a  "Miss"  instead 
of  a  "Mrs."  and  I  shamelessly  let  it 
pass.  During  service  I  heard  little  that 
was  said  for  the  band  was  playing  out 
side  and  flags  were  flying  and  I  was 
feeling  frivolous  to  the  tip  of  my  toe! 
63 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

I  guess  I  am  still  pretty  young,  for 
brass  buttons  are  just  as  alluring  as 
of  old. 

When  the  Admiral  heard  I  was  from 
Kentucky,  he  invited  us  to  take  tiffin 
with  him,  and  we  exchanged  darkey 
stories  and  the  old  gentleman  nearly 
burst  his  buttons  laughing.  After  tea, 
he  showed  us  over  the  ship,  making  the 
sailors  line  up  on  deck  for  our  benefit. 

"Tell  the  band  to  play  'Old  Ken 
tucky  Home',''  he  ordered. 

"You  '11  lose  a  passenger  if  you  do !" 
I  cried,  "for  one  note  of  that  would 
send  me  overboard!" 

He  was  so  attentive  that  I  had  little 
chance  to  talk  to  the  young  officers  I 
met.  But  several  of  them  have  called 
since,  and  I  have  been  out  to  a  lot  of 
teas  and  dinners  and  things  with  them. 

The  one  I  like  best  is  a  young  fellow 
from  Vermont.  He  is  very  clever  and 
64 


The  Lady  of  the   Decoration 

jolly  and  we  have  great  fun  together. 
In  fact,  we  are  such  chums  that  he 
showed  me  a  picture  of  his  fiancee.  He 
is  very  much  in  love  with  her,  but  if 
I  were  in  her  place  I  would  try  to  keep 
him  within  eye-shot. 

We  will  probably  go  home  to-mor 
row  as  Miss  Dixon  is  so  much  better. 
I  am  glad  she  is  better,  but  I  could 
have  been  reconciled  to  her  being 
mildly  indisposed  for  a  few  days 
longer. 

I  forgot  to  thank  you  for  the  kodak 
book  you  sent  Christmas;  between  the 
joy  of  seeing  all  the  familiar  faces,  and 
the  bitterness  of  the  separation,  and 
the  absurdity  of  your  jingles,  I  nearly 
had  hysterics !  I  almost  felt  as  if  I  had 
had  a  visit  home!  The  old  house,  the 
cabin,  the  cherry  tree,  and  all  the  fam 
ily  even  down  to  old  black  Charity,  the 
very  sight  of  whom  made  me  hungry 
65 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

for  buckwheat  cakes,  all,  all  gave  me 
such  joy  and  pain  that  it  was  hard  to 
tell  which  was  uppermost. 

It  's  worth  everything  to  be  loved  as 
you  all  love  me,  and  I  am  willing  to 
go  through  anything  to  be  worthy  of 
it  I  have  had  more  than  my  share  of 
hard  bumps  in  life,  but,  thank  Heaven, 
there  was  always  somebody  waiting  to 
kiss  the  place  to  make  it  well.  There 
id  n't  a  day  that  I  have  n't  some  evi 
dence  of  this  love;  a  letter,  a  paper,  a 
book  that  reminds  me  that  I  'm  not 
forgotten. 

A  note  has  just  come  from  his 
Solemn  Highness,  the  purser,  asking 
me  to  go  walking  with  him!  I  am  go 
ing  to  try  to  be  nice  to  him  but  I  know 
I  won't !  He  is  so  young  and  so  serious 
that  I  can't  resist  shocking  him.  He 
does  n't  approve  of  giddy  young  wid 
ows  that  don't  look  sorry!  Neither 
66 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

do  I.    In  two  days  I  return  to  the  fold. 
Until  then  "My  Bonnie"  beware! 


HIROSHIMA,  February  19th,  1902. 

After  a  sleepless  night  I  got  up  this 
morning  with  a  splitting  headache.  I 
have  been  back  in  the  traces  for  a 
month,  and  I  am  beginning  to  feel  like 
a  poor  old  horse  in  a  tread  mill,  not 
that  I  don't  love  the  work,  but  oh! 
Mate,  I  am  so  lonesome,  lonesome,  lone 
some.  I  think  I  used  up  so  much  sand 
when  I  first  came  that  the  supply  is 
running  low. 

11  All  day  there  is  the  watchful  world  to  face 
The  sound  of  tears  and  laughter  fill  the  air. 
For  memory  there  is  but  scanty  space 
Nor  time  for  any  transport  of  despair. 
But,  Love,  the  pulse  beats  slow,  the  lips 
turn  white 

Sometimes  at  night  !  * 

Perhaps  when  I  am  old  and  gray 
67 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

and  wrinkled  I  '11  be  at  peace.  But 
think  of  the  years  in  between!  I  have 
been  cheated  of  the  best  that  life  holds 
for  a  woman,  the  love  of  a.  good  hus 
band,  the  love  of  her  children,  and  the 
joys  of  a  home. 

The  old  world  shakes  its  finger  and 
says  "you  did  it  yourself".  But, 
Mate,  I  was  only  eighteen,  and  I  did 
n't  know  the  real  from  the  false.  I 
staked  my  all  for  the  prize  of  love,  and 
I  lost.  Heaven  knows  I  Ve  paid  the 
penalty,  but  I  'd  do  it  over  again  if 
I  thought  I  was  right.  The  difference 
is  that  then  I  was  a  child  and  knew 
too  little,  and  now  I  am  a  woman  and 
know  too  much. 

Sometimes  the  hymn-singing  and 
praying,  and  "Sistering"  and  "Bro- 
thering"  get  on  my  nerves,  until  I 
almost  scream,  but  when  I  remember 
how  heavenly  good  to  me  they  are  I  'in 
68 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

all  contrition.  I  have  even  been  invited 
to  write  for  the  Mission  papers,  now 
is  n't  that  sufficient  glory  for  any 
sinner? 

Your  letters  are  such  comforts  to 
me!  I  read  them  over  and  over  and 
actually  know  parts  of  them  by  heart! 
Siree  I  was  a  little  girl  I  have  had  a 
burning  desire  to  win  your  approval. 
I  remember  once  when  you  said  I  was 
stronger  than  the  little  boy  next  door 
I  sprained  my  back  trying  to  prove  it. 
And  now  when  you  write  those  lovely 
things  about  me  and  tell  me  how  good 
and  brave  I  am,  why  I  'd  sprain  some 
thing  worse  than  my  back  to  be  worthy 
of  your  approval! 

But  my  courage  does  n't  always  ring 
true,  Mate,  sometimes  it  's  a  brass  ring. 
If  you  want  to  hear  of  true  heroism, 
just  listen  to  this  story.  There  was  a 
little  American  Missionary,  who  was 
69 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

going  home  to  stay  after  twenty  years 
of  hard  service.  At  the  request  of  the 
board  she  stopped  off  at  the  Leper 
Colony  in  order  to  make  a  report. 
Soon  after  she  reached  home,  she  dis 
covered  a  small  white  spot  on  her  hand, 
and  on  consulting  a  physician,  found 
it  was  leprosy.  Without  breathing  a 
word  of  it  to  anyone,  she  bade  her  fam 
ily  and  friends  a  cheerful  good-bye, 
and  came  straight  back  to  that  Leper 
Colony,  where  she  took  up  her  work 
among  the  outcasts.  Never  an  outcry, 
never  a  groan,  not  even  a  plea  for  sym 
pathy!  Now  how  is  that  for  a  soldier 
lady? 

It  is  quite  cold  to-day  and  I  am  in 
dulging  in  the  luxury  of  a  roaring 
fire.  Yo-u  know  the  natives  use  little 
stoves  that  they  carry  around  with 
them,  and  call  "hibachi."  But  cold  as 
it  is,  the  yard  is  full  of  roses  and  the 
70 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

tea-plants  are  gorgeous.  I  don't  won 
der  that  the  climate  gets  mixed,  out 
here.  Everything  else  is  hind  part  be 
fore. 

What  do  you  suppose  I  've  been 
longing  for  all  day?  A  good  saddle 
horse?  I  feel  that  a  brisk  canter  would 
set  me  straight  in  a  short  time.  But 
the  only  horse  in  Hiroshima  is  a  mule. 
A  knock-kneed,  cross-eyed  old  mule 
that  bitterly  resents  the  insult  of  being 
hitched  to  something  that  is  a  cross  be 
tween  a  wheelbarrow  and  a  baby 
buggy.  The  driver  stands  up  for  the 
excellent  reason  that  he  has  no  place 
to  sit  down!  We  tried  this  coupe  once 
for  the  fun  and  experience.  We  got 
the  experience  all  right  but  I  am  not 
so  sure  about  the  fun.  We  jolted 
along  through  the  narrow  streets  scrap 
ing  first  against  one  house,  then  against 
another,  while  our  footman,  oh  yes  we 
71 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

had  a  footman,  ran  beside  the  thor 
oughbred  to  help  him  up  when  he 
stumbled. 

To-morrow  we  are  to  have  company. 
A  Salvation  Army  lassie  comes  down 
from  Tokio  with  a  brass  band.  It  is 
the  second  time  in  the  history  of  the 
town  that  the  people  have  had  a  chance 
to  hear  a  brass  band,  and  they  are 
greatly  thrilled.  I  must  say  I  am  a  bit 
excited  myself;  Miss  Lessing  says  she 
is  going  to  keep  me  in  sight,  for  fear 
I  will  follow  the  drum  away.  She 
need  n't  worry.  I  am  through  follow 
ing  anything  in  this  world  but  my  own 
nose. 


HIROSHIMA,  March  25,  1902. 

I  am  absolutely  walking  on  air  to 
day!  Just  when  I  thought  my  cher 
ished  dream  of  a  free  kindergarten 

72 


The  Lady  of  the   Decoration 

would  have  to  be  given  up,  the  checks 
from  home  came!  You  were  a  trump 
to  get  them  all  interested,  and  it  was 
beautiful  the  way  they  responded. 
Only  icliy  did  you  tell  Jack?  He  ought 
n't  to  have  sent  so  much.  I  'd  send  it 
back  if  I  were  n't  afraid  of  hurting 
him. 

My  head  is  simply  spinning  with 
plans !  We  are  going  to  open  the  school 
light  away  and  there  are  hundreds  of 
things  to  be  done.  In  spite  of  my  home 
sickness,  and  loneliness  and  longing  for 
you  loved  ones,  I  would  n't  come  home 
now  if  I  could!  It  is  the  feeling  that  I 
am  needed  here,  that  a  big  work  will 
go  undone,  if  I  don't  do  it,  that  simply 
puts  my  little  wants  and  desires  right 
out  of  the  question ! 

Yesterday  we  had  a  mothers'  meet 
ing,  and  I  have  not  stopped  laughing 
over  it  yet!  It  seems  that  the  mothers 
73 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

considered  it  proper  to  show  their  ap 
preciation  by  absolute  solemnity.  Af 
ter  tea  and  cake  were  served  they  sat 
in  funeral  silence.  Not  a  word  nor  a 
smile  could  we  get  out  of  them.  When 
I  could  n't  stand  it  another  minute,  I 
told  Miss  Leasing  I  was  going  to  break 
the  ice  if  I  went  under  in  the  effort. 
By  means  of  an  interpreter,  I  told  the 
mothers  that  we  were  going  to  try  an 
American  amusement  and  would  they 
lend  their  honorable  assistance!  Then 
I  called  in  thirty  of  the  school  girls 
and  told  each  one  to  ask  a  mother  to 
skip.  They  were  too  polite  to  decline, 
so  to  the  tune  of  "Mr.  Johnson,  Turn 
Me  Loose,"  the  procession  started. 
Mis-s  Dixon  could  n't  stay  in  the  room 
for  laughing.  The  old  and  the  young, 
and  the  fat  and  the  thin  caught  the 
spirit  of  it  and  went  hopping  and  jump 
ing  around  the  circle  in  great  glee.  Af- 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

ter  that,  old  ladies  and  all  played 
11  Pussy  Wants  a  Corner,"  and  "Drop 
the  Handkerchief,"  and  they  laughed 
and  chattered  like  a  lot  of  children. 
They  stayed  four  hours,  and  we  are  still 
picking  up  hair  ornaments ! 

Up  over  my  table  I  have  the  little 
picture  you  sent  of  the  "Lane  that 
turned  at  last".  You  always  said  my 
lane  would  turn,  and  it  ha-s  turned  into 
a  broad  road  bordered  by  cherry-blos 
soms  and  wistaria.  But,  Mate,  you 
need  n't  think  there  are  no  more  mud- 
holes,  for  there  are.  When  I  see  them 
ahead,  I  climb  the  fence  and  walk 
around ! 

I  am  getting  quite  thrilled  these  days 
over  the  prospect  of  war.  The  soldiers 
are  drilling  by  the  hundreds,  and  the 
bugles  are  blowing  all  day.  It  makes 
little  thrills  run  up  and  down  my  back, 
but  Miss  Lessing  says  nothing  will 
75 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

come  of  it,  that  Japan  is  always  get 
ting  ready  for  a  scrap.  But  the  Trans- 
Siberian  Railway  has  refused  all 
freight  because  it  is  too  busy  bringing 
soldiers  and  supplies  to  Vladivostock. 

Now  speaking  of  Vladivostock  re 
minds  me  of  a  plan  that  has  been  sug 
gested  for  next  summer.  Miss  Dixon, 
the  teacher  who  was  sick,  is  going  to 
Russia  and  is  crazy  for  me  to  go  with 
her.  It  would  n't  be  much  more  ex 
pensive  than  staying  in  Japan,  and 
would  be  tremendously  interesting. 
Don't  mention  it  to  anybody  at  home, 
but  write  me  if  you  approve. 

I  wish  you  could  have  peeped  into 
my  room  last  night.  Four  or  five  of 
the  girls  slipped  in  after  the  silence 
bell  had  rung,  and  we  sat  around  the 
fire  on  the  floor  and  drank  tea  while 
I  showed  them  my  photographs.  They 
made  such  a  pretty  picture,  with  their 
76 


The  Lady  of  the   Decoration 

gay  gowns  and  red  cheeks,  and  they 
were  so  thrilled  over  all  my  things. 
The  pictures  from  home  interested 
them  most  of  all,  especially  the  one  of 
you  and  Jack  which  I  have  framed  to 
gether.  At  first  they  thought  you  must 
be  married,  and  when  I  said  no,  they 
decided  that  you  were  lovers,  so  I  let 
it  go. 

After  they  went  to  bed,  I  sat  and 
looked  at  the  two  pictures  in  the  double 
frame  and  wondered  how  it  was  after 
all  that  you  and  Jack  had  n't  fallen  in 
love  with  each  other!  You  both  live 
with  your  heads  in  the  clouds ;  I  should 
think  you  would  have  bumped  into  each 
other  long  before  this.  He  told  me  once 
that  you  had  fewer  faults  than  any 
woman  he  had  ever  known.  Telling  me 
of  other  people's  virtues  was  one  of 
Jack's  long  suits. 

My  last  minute  of  grace  is  gone,  so 
77 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

I  must  say  good-night.  I  am  getting 
up  at  five  o'clock  these  mornings  in 
order  to  get  in  all  that  I  want  to  do. 


HIROSHIMA,  May  31,  1902. 

Under  promise  that  I  will  not  write 
a  long  letter,  I  am  allowed  to  begin 
one  to  you  this  morning.  Miss  Lessing 
wrote  you  last  week  that  I  had  been 
sick.  The  truth  is  I  tried  to  do  too 
much,  and  paid  up  for  it  by  staying  in 
bed  two  whole  weeks.  Perhaps  I  will 
acquire  a  little  sense  in  the  next  world ; 
I  certainly  have  n't  in  this!  Japan 
was  n't  made  for  restless,  energetic 
people.  If  you  can't  learn  to  be  lazy, 
you  can't  last  long. 

I  can  never  tell  you  how  good  Miss 
Lessing  has  been,  sleeping  right  by  me, 
taking  care  of  me  and  loving  me  like 
78 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

I  was  her  own  child.  The  girls  too, 
have  been  so  good  sending  me  gifts  al 
most  every  hour  in  the  day.  One  little 
girl  got  up  at  prayers  the  other  night, 
and,  folding  her  hands,  said : ' '  Oh  Lord, 
please  make  the  Skipping  Sensei  well, 
and  help  me  to  keep  my  mouth  shut 
so  it  will  be  quiet,  for  she  has  been  good 
to  us  and  we  all  do  love  her  much." 
Heaven  knows  the  " Skipping  Sensei" 
needs  all  the  prayers  of  the  congrega 
tion! 

Just  as  soon  as  school  is  over,  Miss 
Dixon  and  I  start  for  Eussia.  It  's  a 
good  thing  that  vacation  is  near  for  I 
am  tired  of  being  a  Missionary  lady, 
and  a  school-marm,  in  fact  I  am  tired 
of  being  good. 

Don't  worry  about  me,  for  I  am  all 
right.  I  've  just  run  down  and  need 
a  little  fun  to  wind  me  up  for  another 
year. 

79 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 


KOBE,  July  16,  1902. 

Does  July  16th  mean  anything  to  you ! 
It  does  to  me.  Just  one  year  ago  to 
day  the  gates  of  that  old  Union  Depot 
shut  between  me  and  all  that  was  dear 
to  me,  and  I  went  out  into  the  big 
world  to  fight  my  big  fight  alone.  Well, 
I  am  still  fighting,  Mate,  and  probably 
will  be  to  the  end  of  the  campaign. 

As  you  see  I  am  in  Kobe  waiting  for 
my  pass-port  to  go  to  Russia.  If  there 
is  anything  you  want  to  know  about 
pass-ports  just  apply  to  me.  With  all 
confidence,  I  sailed  down  to  the  Con 
sulate  and  was  met  by  a  pair  of  legs 
attached  to  a  huge  mustache  and  the 
funniest  little  button  of  a  head  you  ever 
saw.  I  think  the  Lord  must  have 
laughed  when  he  got  through  making 
that  man!  He  was  horribly  bored  with 
life  in  general,  and  me  in  particular. 
8Q 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

He  motioned  me  wearily  to  a  chair  be 
side  a  table,  and,  handing  me  a  paper, 
managed  to  sigh:  "Fill  in." 

The  questions  were  about  like  this: 
Who  was  your  father?  What  are  you 
doing  out  of  your  own  country?  Was 
anybody  in  your  family  ever  hung? 
How  many  teeth  have  you? 

I  wrote  rapidly  until  I  got  to  ' '  When 
were  you  born?"  Button-Head  was 
standing  by  me,  so  I  looked  up  at  him 
helplessly  and  told  him  that  was  one 
thing  I  never  could  remember.  He  said 
I  would  have  to,  and  I  said  I  could  n't. 
He  pranced  around  for  fifteen  minutes, 
and  I  pretended  to  be  racking  my 
brain. 

Then  he  handed  me  a  Bible,  and  said 
in  a  stern  voice:  "Swear."  I  told  him 
that  I  could  n  't,  that  I  never  had  sworn, 
that  ladies  did  n't  do  it  in  America, 
would  n't  he  please  do  it  for  me? 

About  this  time  Miss  DLson  spoiled 
81. 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

the  fun  by  laughing,  so  I  had  to  behave. 
After  we  had  spent  two  hours  and 
three  dollars  in  that  dingy  old  office, 
we  departed,  but  our  troubles  were  not 
over.  No  sooner  had  we  reached  the 
hotel  than  Button-Head  appeared  with 
more  papers.  "You  failed  to  describe 
yourself,"  he  mournfully  announced, 
handing  me  another  slip. 

I  had  not  had  my  dinner  and  I  was 
cross,  but  I  seized  a  pen  determined 
to  make  short  work  of  it  How  tall? 
Easily  told.  Black  or  white?  Very 
easy.  Kind  of  chin?  Bound  and  rosy. 
Shape  of  face?  Depends  on  time  and 
place.  Hair?  Pure  gold.  Eyes? 
Now  I  knew  they  were  green  but  that 
did  not  sound  poetic  enough  so  I  ap 
pealed  to  Dixie.  She  thought  for  a 
while,  then  said,  '  *  Not  gray  nor  brown, 
I  have  it,  they  are  syrup  colored ! "  So 
I  put  it  down  along  with  a  lot  of  other 
nonsense. 

82 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

Now  the  papers  have  to  be  sent  to 
Tokyo  for  approval,  then  back  here 
again  where  I  will  have  to  do  some 
more  signing  and  swearing.  Is  n't 
this  enough  to  discourage  people  from 
ever  going  anywhere? 

The  news  about  the  sailboat  is  great. 
How  many  of  you  will  be  up  at  the  Cape 
this  summer!  Is  Jack  going?  When 
I  think  of  the  starlight  nights  out  in 
the  boat,  and  the  long  lazy  mornings 
on  the  beach,  I  get  absolutely  faint 
with  longing.  Heretofore  I  have  n't 
dared  to  enjoy  things,  and  now,  when 
I  might,  I  am  an  exile  heading  for  Si 
beria  !  Oh,  well !  perhaps  there  will  be 
starlight  nights  in  Siberia,  who  knows  ? 

VLADIVOSTOCK,  SIBERIA, 

August  16,  1902. 

If  I  should  write  all  I  wanted  to  say 
this  morning,  my  letter  would  reach 
83 


The  Ladv  ot  the  Decoration 


j 


across  the  Pacific!  I  did  n't  believe 
it  was  possible  for  me  ever  to  have  such 
a  good  time  again. 

When  we  came,  we  brought  a  letter 
of  introduction  to  a  Mrs.  Heath.  She 
has  a  beautiful  big  house,  and  a  beau 
tiful  big  heart,  and  she  took  us  right 
into  both. 

The  day  after  we  arrived,  I  was  stand 
ing  on  her  piazza  looking  down  the  bay, 
when  I  saw  a  battle-ship  come  sail 
ing  in  under  a  salute  of  seventeen  guns 
from  the  fort.  It  turned  out  to  be  the 
''Victor,"  and  you  never  knew  such 
rejoicing.  Mrs.  Heath  knows  all  the 
navy  people  and  her  house  is  a  favor 
ite  rendezvous.  Before  night,  we  had 
met  many  old  acquaintances,  among 
them  my  Nagasaki  friend.  "Vermont." 

It  has  been  tremendously  jolly  and 
I  can't  deny  that  I  have  been  outrage 
ously  frivolous  for  a  missionary!  But 
84 


The  Lady  of  the   Decoration 

to  save  my  life  I  can't  conjure  up  the 
ghost  of  a  regret!  And  what  is  more, 
I  have  been  contaminating  Dixie!  I 
have  kept  her  in  such  a  giddy  whirl 
that  she  says  I  have  paralysed  her  con 
science!  I  have  dressed  her  up  and 
trotted  her  along  to  lunches,  teas  and 
dinners,  to  concerts  on  sea  and  land, 
and  once,  Oh!  awful  confession,  I  bull 
dozed  her  into  going  to  the  theatre! 
The  consequence  is  that  she  has  gotten 
entirely  well  and  looks  ten  years 
younger.  Her  chief  trouble  was  that 
she  had  surrounded  herself  with  a  reg 
ular  picket  fence  of  creed  and  dogma, 
and  was  afraid  to  lift  her  eyes  for  fear 
she  would  catch  a  glimpse  through  the 
cracks,  of  the  beautiful  world  which 
God  meant  for  us  to  enjoy.  It  gave 
me  particular  joy  to  pull  a  few  palings 
off  that  picket  fence! 

Most  of  my  time  is  spent  on  the  wa- 
85 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

ter  with  Vermont.  I  don't  find  it  half 
bad  out  on  the  bewitching  Uzzuri  Bay 
when  the  moon  is  shining  and  the  music 
floats  over  the  water,  to  discuss  love 
with  a  fascinating  youth ! 

What  does  it  matter  if  he  is  talking 
about  "the  other  one"?  Don't  you 
suppose  that  I  am  glad  to  know  that 
somewhere  in  this  wide  world  there  's  a 
man  that  can  be  loyal  to  his  sweetheart 
even  though  she  is  ten  thousand  miles 
away? 

I  ask  occasional  questions  and  don't 
listen  to  the  answers,  and  he  pours  out 
his  confessions  and  thinks  I  am  lovely. 
He  really  is  one  of  the  dearest  fellows 
I  ever  met,  and  I  am  glad  for  that 
other  girl  with  all  my  heart. 

I  like  several  of  the  other  men  very 
much  but  they  bother  me  with  ques 
tions.  They  refuse  to  believe  that 
I  am  connected  with  a  mission,  and  con 
sider  it  all  as  a  huge  joke. 
86 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

I  wish  you  could  see  this  place.  It 
is  built  in  terraces  up  the  greenest  of 
mountains  and  forms  a  crescent  around 
the  bay.  Everybody  seems  to  be  in 
uniform  of  some  kind,  and  soldiers  and 
sailors  are  at  every  turn.  The  streets 
are  a  glittering  panorama  of  strange 
color  and  form.  At  night  everything 
is  ablaze,  bands  playing,  uniforms  glit 
tering,  and  flags  flying.  It  is  all  just 
one  intense  thrill  of  life  and  rhythm, 
and  the  cloven  foot  of  my  worldliness 
never  fails  to  keep  time. 

But  when  daylight  comes  and  all  the 
sordid  ugliness  is  revealed,  disgust 
takes  the  place  of  fascination.  The 
streets  are  crowded  with  thousands  of 
degraded  Chinese  and  Koreans,  who, 
even  in  their  brutality,  are  not  as  bad 
as  the  ordinary  Russians. 

Through  this  mass  of  poverty  and 
degradation  dash  handsome  carriages 
filled  with  richly  clad  people.  The  dri- 
87 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

vers  wear  long  blue  plush  blouses  with 
red  sleeves  and  belt,  and  trousers 
tucked  in  high  boots.  On  their  heads 
they  wear  funny  little  hats  that  look  as 
if  they  had  been  sat  on.  They  gener 
ally  stand  up  while  driving  and  lash 
the  poor  horses  into  a  dead  run  from 
start  to  finish.  Many  of  them  are  ex- 
convicts  and  can  never  leave  Siberia. 
If  their  cruelty  to  horses  is  any  cri 
terion  of  their  cruelty  to  their  fellow 
men,  I  can 't  help  thinking  they  deserve 
their  punishment. 

I  won't  dare  to  mail  this  letter  until 
I  get  out  of  Russia  for  they  are  so 
cranky  about  their  blessed  old  country. 
They  would  not  even  let  me  have  a 
little  flag  to  send  to  the  boys  at  home! 
I  found  out  to-day  that  a  policeman 
comes  every  day  to  see  what  we  have 
been  doing,  what  hours  we  keep,  etc. 
In  fact  every  movement  is  watched, 
88 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

and  one  day  when  we  returned  to  the 
hotel,  we  found  that  all  our  pos 
sessions  had  been  searched,  and  the 
police  had  even  left  their  old  cigar 
stumps  among  our  things!  The  more 
you  see  of  Russia,  the  more  deeply  you 
fall  in  love  with  Uncle  Sam! 

Several  days  ago  Mrs.  Heath  gave 
us  a  tennis-tea  and  we  had  a  jolly  time. 
The  tea  was  served  under  the  trees 
from  a  steaming  samovar,  around 
which  gathered  representatives  of 
many  nations.  There  were  many  un 
pronounceable  gentlemen,  and  one  real 
English  Lord,  who  considered  Amer 
icans,  ''frightfully  amusing." 

I  thought  I  had  forgotten  how  to 
play  tennis  but  I  had  n't.  That  under 
cut  that  Jack  taught  us  won  me  a  rep 
utation. 

It  is  only  when  I  stop  to  think,  that 
I  realize  how  far  I  am  from  home! 
89 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

When  I  wonder  where  you  all  are  this 
minute,  and  what  you  are  doing,  I  feel 
as  if  I  were  on  a  visit  to  the  planet 
Mars,  and  had  no  communication  what 
ever  with  the  world. 

Think  of  me,  Mate,  in  Siberia,  eating 
fish  with  a  spoon,  and  drinking  coffee 
from  a  glass !  Verily,  when  old  Sister 
Fate  found  she  could  not  down  me,  she 
must  have  decided  to  play  pranks 
with  me! 

My  box  of  new  clothes  arrived  just 
before  I  started,  and  I  have  had  use 
for  everything.  When  I  get  on  the 
white  coat  suit  and  the  white  hat,  I  feel 
like  a  dream. 

The  weather  is  simply  glorious,  like 
our  best  October  days  at  home.  No 
thing  could  be  more  unlike  than  Russia 
and  Japan !  one  is  a  great  oil  painting, 
tragic,  majestic,  grand,  while  the  other 
90 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

is  an  exquisitely  dainty  water  color  full 
of  sunshine  and  flowers. 

Callers  have  come  so  I  must  close. 
Life  is  a  very  pretty  game  after  all, 
especially  when  you  get  wise  enough 
to  look  on. 


VLADIVOSTOCK,  SIBERIA, 

September  1,  1902. 

Just  a  short  letter  to  tell  you  that 
we  leave  Vladivostock  to-night.  I  am 
all  broken  up ;  it  has  been  the  happiest 
summer  that  I  have  had  for  years  and 
I  can't  bear  to  think  of  it  being  over. 

It  has  been  so  long  since  Peace  and 
I  have  been  acquainted  that  I  hardly 
yet  dare  look  her  full  in  the  face  for 
fear  she  will  take  flight  and  leave  me 
in  utter  darkness  again.  Even  if  she 
has  not  come  to  live  with  me,  she  is  at 
91 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

least  my  next  door  neighbor,  and  I  of 
fer  her  incense  that  she  may  abide. 

Now  I  might  as  well  confess  that  if 
it  were  not  for  Memory  there  is  no 
telling  what  Peace  might  do!  Poor 
old  Memory!  I  'd  like  to  throttle  her 
sometime  and  bury  her  in  a  deep  hole. 
Yet  she  has  served  me  many  a  good 
turn,  and  often  laid  a  restraining  hand 
on  impulse  and  thought.  But  she  is  like 
a  poor  relation,  always  turning  up  at 
the  wrong  time ! 

For  instance,  on  a  gorgeous  moon 
light  night  on  the  Uzzuri  Bay  when 
you  are  out  in  a  sampan  with  a  pig 
tail  who  neither  sees  nor  hears,  and 
your  companion  is  clever  enough  to  be 
fascinating  and  daring  enough  to  say 
things  he  "had  n't  oughter,"  and  the 
music  and  the  moonlight  gets  into  your 
head,  and  you  feel  young  and  reckless 
and  sentimental,  then  all  of  a  sudden 
9? 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

Memory  recalls  another  moonlight 
night  when  the  youth  and  the  romance 
were  n't  merely  make  believe,  and  your 
mind  travels  wearily  over  the  interven 
ing  years,  and  you  sit  up  straight  and 
look  severe  and  put  your  hands  behind 
you! 

Oh !  I  am  clinging  to  my  ideal,  Mate, 
never  fear.  I  've  held  on  to  her  gar 
ments  until  they  are  tattered  and  torn. 
You  introduced  me  to  her  and  I  have 
never  lost  sight  of  her  entirely. 

This  afternoon  the  Victor  sailed  for 
the  Philippines.  As  she  passed  Mrs. 
Heath's  cottage  where  we  had  all 
promised  to  be,  she  dipped  her  colors. 
I  felt  pretty  blue  for  I  knew  my  good 
times  were  on  board,  and  were  sailing 
out  of  sight. 

I  am  now  at  the  hotel,  trunk  and 
boxes  packed,  waiting  to  start.  Cin 
derella  is  not  going  to  wait  for  the 
93 


The  .Lady  of  the  Decoration 

stroke  of  twelve;  she  has  donned  her 
sober  garments  and  is  ready  to  be 
whisked  back  to  the  cinders  on  the 
hearth.  I  am  glad  hard  work  is  ahead ; 
a  solid  grind  seems  necessary  for  my 
soul's  salvation. 

Farewell,  vain  earth!  I  love  you 
not  wisely  but  too  well. 

Why  can 't  people  be  nice  to  one  with 
out  being  too  nice  ?  And  why  can 't  you 
be  horrid  to  people  without  being  too 
horrid  ?  Selah. 

HIROSHIMA,  October  10,  1902. 

Dear  Old  Mate: 

I  am  so  dead  tired  to-night  that  I 
could  not  tell  what  part  of  me  ached 
the  most!  But  the  spirit  moves  me  to 
unburden  my  soul  and  I  feel  that  I 
must  write  you.  For  this  is  one  of  my 
dream  nights,  and  I  have  so  many  in 
94 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

Japan,  when  my  old  shell  is  too  ex 
hausted  to  move,  and  so  permits  my 
soul  to  wander  where  it  will,  a  dream 
night,  when  the  moon  is  its  silveriest 
and  biggest  and  I  want  to  hug  it  for 
I  know  that  twelve  hours  before  it 
looked  down  on  my  loved  ones,  and 
now  it  comes  to  make  more  beautiful 
this  fairy  land,  hiding  the  scars  and 
ugly  places,  touching  the  pine  trees 
with  silver  points,  and  glorifying  the 
old  Temples,  till  one  wonders  if  they 
could  have  been  made  by  hands.  A 
night  when  the  white  robed  priests  are 
doing  honor  to  some  "heathen  idol" 
and  must  needs  call  his  wandering  at 
tention  by  the  stroke  of  the  deep  toned 
bell,  which  sends  its  music  far  across 
sleeping  Japan,  out  into  the  wonderful 
sea. 

I  don't  know  what  comes  over  me 
such  nights  as  these.    I  don't  seem  to 
95 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

be  me  at  all!  I  can  lie  most  of  the 
night,  wide  awake,  yet  unconscious  of 
my  surroundings,  and  dream  dreams. 
I  live  through  all  the  joyful  days  of 
childhood,  then  through  the  sorrowful 
days  of  womanhood  when  I  was  learn 
ing  how  to  live,  through  the  years 
of  heartache  and  heart-break, — and 
through  it  all,  though  I  actually  suffer, 
there  is  such  an  unspeakable  lightness 
and  buoyancy,  such  a  lifting  up,  that 
even  pain  is  a  pleasure.  I  can 't  explain 
it  all,  unless  it  is  the  influence  of  this 
mysterious  country,  lulling  and  sooth 
ing,  but  powerful  and  subtle  as  poison. 
My  dear  girl  you  say  you  feel  too 
far  away  to  help  me!  Now  don't  you 
worry  about  that !  If  you  never  wrote 
me  another  line,  you  would  help  me. 
Just  to  know  that  you  are  around  there, 
on  the  other  side  of  the  earth,  believing 
in  me,  loving  me,  and  approving  of  me, 
96 


The  Lady  of  the   Decoration 

means  everything.  You  were  right  to 
make  me  come,  and  while  it  cost  me 
my  very  heart's  blood,  yet  I  am  learn 
ing  my  lesson  as  you  said  I  would. 

My  little  ship  may  never  again  sail 
into  the  harbor  of  happiness,  yet  there 
are  sunny  seas  where  soft  winds  blow, 
and  even  if  my  ship  is  all  by  its  lone 
some,  yet  it  's  such  a  frisky  craft,  war 
ranted  never  to  sink,  no  matter  what 
the  weather,  that  it  can  sail  over  many 
seas,  touch  many  lands,  and  grow  rich 
in  experience.  And  hid  away  in  the 
locker  where  no  eye  save  mine  may 
see,  are  my  treasures ;  your  love  is  one, 
and  nothing  can  rob  me  of  it. 

What  you  write  me  of  Jack  makes 
me  very  unhappy.  I  am  not  worth  his 
worrying  over.  Tell  him  so,  Mate.  If 
I  could  ever  care  for  anybody  again  in 
this  world,  it  would  be  for  him,  but  if 
an  occasional  sentiment  dares  to  spring 
7  97 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

up  into  my  heart,  I  pull  it  up  by  the 
roots !  I  would  give  anything  to  write 
to  him,  but  I  know  it  would  only  bring 
pain  to  us  both.  Be  good  to  him,  Mate, 
I  can't  bear  to  think  of  him  being 
miserable. 

I  am  so  tired  that  I  can  scarcely 
keep  the  tears  back.  I  must  write  no 
more. 


HIROSHIMA,  November  14,  1902. 

I  have  about  fifteen  minutes  between 
classes,  and  I  am  going  to  spend  them 
on  you.  Now  who  do  you  suppose  has 
come  to  the  surface  again?  Little  Ger 
many,  who  was  on  the  steamer  coming 
over.  He  wasted  a  great  many  stamps 
on  me  for  the  first  few  months  after 
we  landed  but  he  got  tired  of  playing 
solos.  He  was  on  his  way  to  Thibet 
to  enter  a  monastery  to  study  some 
98 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

ancient  language.  Heaven  knows  why 
he  wants  to  know  anything  more  an 
tique  than  the  language  he  speaks!  I 
don't  believe  there  is  any  old  dusty, 
forgotten  corner  of  the  world  that  he 
has  n't  poked  into. 

Well  you  know  the  fatal  magnetism 
I  exert  over  fossils !  They  always  turn 
to  me  as  naturally  as  needles  turn  to 
a  loadstone.  This  particular  mummy 
was  no  exception. 

I  wrote  him  a  formal  stately  answer, 
reminding  him  in  gentle  reproof  that 
I  was  a  widow  (God  save  the  Mark) 
and  that  my  life  was  dedicated  to  my 
work.  It  was  no  use,  he  bombarded 
me  with  letters,  with  bigger  and  bigger 
words  and  longer  and  fiercer  quota 
tions.  In  the  last  one  he  threatens  to 
come  to  Hiroshima ! 

If  he  does,  I  am  going  to  shave  my 
eye-brows  and  black  my  teeth!  He 
99 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

speaks  seven  languages,  and  yet  he 
does  n't  know  the  meaning  of  the  one 
word  * '  no. ' ' 

Jack  used  to  say  that  if  a  man  was 
persistent  enough  he  could  win  a 
woman  in  spite  of  the  Devil.  I  would 
like  to  see  him!  I  mean  Jack,  not 
Dutchy  nor  the  Devil. 


HIROSHIMA,  Christmas  Eve,  1902. 

I  am  in  the  very  thickest  of  Christ 
mas,  and  yet  such  a  funny,  unreal 
Christmas,  that  it  does  not  seem  nat 
ural  at  all.  Hiroshima  is  busy  decora 
ting  for  the  New  Year,  and  everything 
is  gay  with  brilliant  lanterns,  plum 
blossoms  and  crimson  berries.  The 
little  insignificant  streets  are  changed 
into  bowers  of  sweet  smelling  ferns 
and  spicy  pines,  and  the  bamboo 
leaves  sway  to  every  breeze,  while  the 
100 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

waxen  plum  blossoms  send  out  a  per 
fume  sweet  as  violets. 

The  shop-keepers  and  their  families 
put  on  their  gayest  kimonos  and  their 
most  enticing  smiles  and  greet  you  with 
effusion. 

On  entering  a  shop  you  are  asked 
if  your  honorable  eyes  will  deign  to 
look  upon  most  unworthy  goods. 
Please  will  you  give  this  or  that  a  little 
adoring  look?  The  price?  Ah!  it's 
price  is  greatly  enhanced  since  the  au 
gust  foreigner  cast  honorable  eyes 
upon  it.  (Which  is  no  joke!)  Whether 
the  article  is  bought  or  not,  the  smile, 
the  bow,  the  compliment  are  the  same. 
All  this  time  the  crowd  around  the  door 
of  the  shop  has  been  steadily  increas 
ing  until  daylight  is  shut  out,  for  every 
one  is  interested  in  your  purchase  from 
the  man  who  hauls  the  dray  up  to  the 
highest  lady  in  the  land.  The  shop- 
101 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

keeper  is  very  patient  with  the  crowd 
until  it  shuts  out  the  light,  then  he  in 
vites  them  to  carry  their  useless  bodies 
to  the  river  and  throw  them  in. 

Once  outside  you  see  another  crowd 
and  as  curiosity  is  in  the  air,  you  crane 
your  neck  and  try  to  get  closer.  The 
center  of  attraction  is  a  man  in  spot 
less  white  cooking  bean  cake  on  a  little 
hibachi.  The  air  is  cold  and  crisp,  and 
the  smell  of  the  savory  bean  paste, 
piping  hot,  makes  you  hungry. 

Next  comes  the  fish  man  with  a  big 
flat  basket  on  each  end  of  a  pole,  and 
offers  you  a  choice  lot;  long  slippery 
eels,  beautiful  shrimp,  as  pink  as  the 
sunset,  and  juicy  oysters  whose  shells 
have  been  scrubbed  until  they  are 
gleaming  white.  Around  the  baskets 
are  garlands  of  paper  roses  to  hide 
from  view  the  ugly  rough  edges  of  the 
straw. 

102 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

The  candy  shops  tempt  yon  to  the 
last  sen,  and  the  toy  shops  are  a  perfect 
joy.  Funny  fat  Japanese  dolls  and 
stuffed  rabbits  and  cross-eyed,  tailless 
cats  demand  attention.  Perhaps  you 
will  see  a  cheap.  American  doll  with 
blue  eyes  and  yellow  hair  carefully  ex 
hibited  under  a  glass  case,  and  when 
you  are  wondering  why  they  treasure 
this  cheap  toy,  you  happen  to  glance 
down  and  catch  the  worshipping  gaze 
of  a  wistful,  half  starved  child,  and 
your  point  of  view  changes  at  once  and 
you  begin  to  understand  the  value  of 
it,  and  to  wish  with  all  your  heart  that 
you  could  put  an  American  dolly  in 
the  hands  of  every  little  Japanese  girl 
on  the  Island! 

It  is  getting  almost  time  to  open  my 

box  and  I  am  right  childish  over  it.    It 

has  been  here  for  two  days,  and  I  have 

slipped  in  a  dozen  times  to  look  at  it 

103 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

and  touch  it.  Ohl  Mate,  the  time  has 
been  so  long,  so  cruelly  long!  I  wake 
myself  up  in  the  night  some  time  sob 
bing.  One  year  and  a  half  behind  me, 
and  two  and  a  half  ahead !  I  remember 
mother  telling  about  the  day  I  started 
to  school,  how  I  came  home  and  said 
triumphantly,  "Just  think  I  Ve  only 
got  ten  more  years  to  go  to  school!" 

Poor  little  duffer !  She  's  still  going 
to  school! 

Last  night  I  had  another  mother's 
meeting  for  the  mothers  of  the  Free 
Kindergarten.  This  time  I  gave  a 
magic  lantern  show,  and  I  was  the 
showman.  The  poor,  ignorant  women 
sat  there  bewildered.  They  had  never 
seen  a  piano,  and  many  of  them  had 
never  been  close  to  a  foreigner  before. 
I  showed  them  about  a  hundred  slides, 
explained  through  an  interpreter  until 
I  was  hoarse,  gesticulated  and  orated 
104 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

to  no  purpose.  They  remained  silent 
and  stolid.  By  and  by  there  was  a 
stir,  heads  were  raised,  and  necks 
craned.  A  sudden  interest  swept  over 
the  room.  I  followed  their  gaze  and 
saw  on  the  sheet  the  picture  of  Christ 
toiling  up  the  mountain  under  the  bur 
den  of  the  cross.  The  story  was  new 
and  strange  to  them,  but  the  fact  was 
as  old  as  life  itself.  At  last  they  had 
found  something  that  touched  their 
own  lives  and  brought  the  quick  tears 
of  sympathy  to  their  eyes. 

I  am  going  to  have  a  meeting  every 
month  for  them,  no  matter  what  else 
has  to  go  undone. 

It  is  almost  time  to  hang  up  our 
stockings.  Miss  Lessing  and  Dixie  ob 
jected  at  first,  but  I  told  them  I  was 
either  going  to  be  very  foolish  or  very 
blue,  they  could  take  their  choice.  I 
have  to  do  something  to  scare  away  the 
105 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

ghosts  of  dead  Christmases,  so  I  put 
on  my  fool's  cap  and  jingle  my  bells. 
When  I  begin  to  weaken,  I  go  to  the 
piano  and  play  "Come  Ye  Disconso 
late"  to  rag  time,  and  it  cheers  me 
up  wonderfully. 

I  guess  it  's  just  about  daylight  with 
you  now.  Pete  is  tiptoeing  in  to  make 
the  fires.  I  can  hear  him  now  saying: 
"Christmas  Gif  Mister  Sam,  Chris '- 
mus  Gif  Miss  Bettie!"  and  the  chil 
dren  are  flying  around  in  their  night 
clothes  wild  with  excitement.  Down 
in  the  sitting  room  the  stockings  make 
a  circle  around  the  room  and  under 
neath  each  is  a  pile  of  gifts.  I  can  see 
the  big  log  fire,  and  the  sparkle  of  it 
in  the  old  book-case,  and  in  the  long 
glass  between  the  windows.  And  in  a 
few  minutes  here  you  all  come,  you  un 
cles  and  you  cousins  and  you  aunts, 
trooping  in  with  the  smallest  first. 
And  such  laughing,  and  shouting,  and 
106 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

rejoicing!  and  maybe  in  the  midst  of 
the  fun  somebody  speaks  of  me,  and 
there  's  a  little  hush,  and  a  little  long 
ing,  then  the  fun  goes  on  more  furi 
ously  than  ever. 

Well  even  if  I  am  on  the  wrong  side 
of  the  earth  in  body,  I  am  not  in  spirit, 
and  I  reach  my  arms  clear  around  the 
world  and  cry  "God  bless  you,  every 
one. ' ' 


HIEOSHIMA,  March,  1903. 

I  have  a  strong  conviction  that  I  ana 
going  to  swear  before  I  get  through 
this  letter,  for  this  pen  is  what  I  would 
call,  to  use  unmissionary  language, 
devilish.  My!  how  familiar  and 
wicked  that  word  looks !  I  Ve  heard  so 
many  hymns  and  so  much  brotherly 
and  sisterly  talk  that  it  seems  like  meet 
ing  an  old  friend  to  see  it  written ! 

Here  it  is  nearly  cherry-blossom 
107 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

time  again,  and  the  days  and  the  weeks 
are  slipping  away  into  months  before 
I  know  it.  I  am  working  at  full  speed 
and  wonder  sometimes  how  I  keep  up. 
But  I  don't  dare  leave  any  leisure  for 
heartaches,  even  when  the  body  is  quiv 
ering  from  weariness,  and  every  nerve 
cries  out  for  rest.  I  must  keep  on  and 
on  and  on,  for  all  too  easily  the  dread 
memories  come  creeping  back  and  en 
fold  me  until  there  is  no  light  on  any 
side.  From  morning  until  night  it  is 
a  fight  against  the  tide. 

Work  is  the  only  thing  that  keeps 
me  from  thinking,  and  I  am  determined 
not  to  think.  I  suppose  I  am  as  con 
tented  here  as  I  could  be  anywhere. 
My  whole  heart  is  in  the  kindergarten 
and  the  success  of  it,  and  maybe  the 
day  will  come  when  my  work  will  be 
all  sufficient  to  satisfy  my  soul's  crav 
ing.  But  it  has  n't  come  yet! 
108 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

I  almost  envy  some  of  these  good 
people  who  can  stand  in  the  middle  of 
one  of  their  prayers  and  touch  all  four 
sides.  They  know  what  they  want  and 
are  satisfied  when  they  get  it,  but  I 
want  the  moon  and  the  stars  and  the 
sun  thrown  in. 

When  things  seem  closing  in  upon 
me  and  everything  looks  dark,  I  flee 
to  the  woods.  I  never  knew  what  the 
trees  and  the  wind  and  the  sky  really 
meant  until  I  came  out  here  and  had 
to  make  friends  of  them.  I  think  you 
have  to  be  by  yourself  and  a  bit  lone 
some  before  Nature  ever  begins  to 
whisper  her  secrets.  Can  you  imagine 
Philistine  Me  going  out  on  the  hill  top 
to  see  the  sun-rise  and  going  without 
my  supper  to  see  it  set?  I  am  even 
studying  the  little  botany  that  Jack 
gave  me,  though  my  time  and  my  intel 
lect  are  equally  limited. 
109 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

And  speaking  of  Jack  leads  me  to 
remark  that  there  is  no  necessity  for 
all  of  you  to  maintain  such  an  oppres 
sive  silence  concerning  him!  Three 
months  ago  you  wrote  me  that  he  was 
not  well,  and  that  he  was  going  south 
with  you  and  sister.  He  must  be  pretty 
sick  to  stop  work  even  for  a  week.  I 
have  pictured  you  sitting  with  a  loaf 
of  bread  and  a  jug  of  wine  beneath 
the  bough  quoting  poetry  at  each  other 
to  your  heart's  content. 

You  say  when  I  come  home  I  can 
rest  on  my  laurels;  no  thank  you,  I 
want  a  Morris  chair,  a  pitcher  of  lem 
onade,  all  the  new  books  and  a  little 
darkey  to  fan  me. 

Mrs.  Heath  has  asked  me  to  visit  her 
in  Vladivostock  this  summer  and  I  am 
going  if  the  cholera  does  n  't  get  worse. 
We  are  so  afraid  of  it  that  we  almost 
boil  the  cow  before  we  drink  the  milk! 
110 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

Among  the  delicacies  of  our  menu 
out  here  are  raw  fish,  pickled  parsnips, 
sea-weed  and  bean-paste.  As  old 
Charity  used  to  say  I  Ve  gotten  so  "ac- 
clamitized"  I  think  I  eould  eat  a  gum 
shoe. 

When  they  send  out  my  spring  box 
from  home,  please  tell  them  to  put  in 
some  fluffy  white  dresses  with  elbow 
sleeves.  Then  I  want  lots  of  pretty 
ribbons,  and  a  white  belt.  I  saw  in  the 
paper  that  crushed  leather  was  the 
proper  thing.  It  sounds  like  something 
good  to  eat,  but  if  it  's  to  wear  send  it 
along. 

My  disposition  will  be  everlastingly 
ruined  if  I  write  another  line  with  this 
pen.  Good-bye. 


Ill 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 


HIROSHIMA,  May,  1903. 

Well  the  catastrophe  arrived  and  we 
were  prisoners  for  nearly  a  week.  It 
was  not  quite  cholera  but  close  enough 
to  it  to  scare  us  all  to  death.  Both  Eve 
and  the  apple  were  young  and  green^ 
and  the  combination  worked  disaster. 
When  the  doctor  arrived,  he  shipped 
Eve  off  to  the  inspection  hospital,  while 
we  were  locked  up,  guarded  by  five 
small  policemen,  and  hardly  allowed 
to  open  our  mouths  for  fear  we  would 
swallow  a  germ.  We  were  fumigated 
and  par-boiled  until  we  felt  like  steam 
puddings.  Nobody  was  allowed  to  go 
in  or  out,  our  vegetables  were  handed 
to  us  in  a  basket  on  a  bamboo  pole  over 
the  wall.  We  tied  notes  to  bricks  and 
flung  them  to  our  neighbors  on  the  out 
side.  Thank  Heaven,  the  servants  were 
112 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

locked  in  too.  Every  day  a  little  man 
with  lots  of  brass  buttons  and  a  big 
voice  came  and  asked  anxiously  after 
our  honorable  insides. 

I  used  every  inducement  to  get  them 
to  let  me  go  out  for  exercise.  I  fixed 
a  tray  with  my  prettiest  cups  and  sent 
a  pot  of  steaming  coffee  and  a  plate 
of  cake  out  to  the  lodge  house.  Word 
came  back,  "We  are  not  permitted  to 
drink  or  taste  food  in  an  infected 
house."  Then  I  tried  them  on  button 
hole  bouquets,  and  when  that  failed,  I 
got  desperate,  and  announced  that  I 
was  subject  to  fits,  unless  I  got  regular 
outside  exercise  every  day.  That 
fetched  them  and  they  gave  the  foreign 
teachers  permission  to  walk  in  the 
country  for  half  an  hour  provided  we 
did  not  speak  to  any  one. 

Eve  was  up  and  having  a  good  time 
before  the  school  gates  were  opened. 
113 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

While  a  prisoner,  I  did  all  sorts  of 
odd  jobs,  patched,  mended,  darned, 
wrote  letters,  and  chopped  down  two 
trees.  The  latter  was  a  little  out  of 
my  line,  but  the  trees  were  eaten  up 
with  caterpillars,  and  as  I  could  not 
get  anybody  to  cut  them  down,  I  sallied 
forth  and  did  it  myself.  My  chef  stood 
by  and  admired  the  job,  but  he  would 
not  assist  for  fear  he  would  unwit 
tingly  murder  one  of  his  ancestors ! 

You  would  certainly  laugh  to  see  me 
keeping  house  with  a  cook  book,  a  gro 
cery  book  and  a  dictionary.  The  other 
day  I  gave  directions  for  poached  eggs, 
and  the  maid  served'  them  in  a  huge 
pan  full  of  water. 

There  are  one  hundred  and  twenty- 
five  yellow  kids  waiting  for  me  so  I 
must  hurry  away. 


114 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 


VLADIVOSTOCK,  SIBERIA,  July,  1903. 

I  did  n't  mean  that  it  should  be  so 
long  a  time  before  I  wrote  you,  but  the 
closing  of  school,  the  Commencement, 
and  the  getting  ready  to  come  up  here 
about  finished  me.  You  remember  the 
old  darkey  song,  "Wisht  I  was  in  Hea- 
ben,  settin'  down"?  Well  that  was 
my  one  ambition  and  I  about  realized 
it  when  I  got  up  here  to  Mrs.  Heath's 
and  she  put  me  in  a  hammock  in  a 
quiet  corner  of  the  porch  and  made  me 
keep  blissfully  still  for  two  whole  days. 

The  air  is  just  as  bracing,  the  hills 
are  just  as  green,  and  the  lights  and 
shadows  dance  over  the  harbor  just  as 
of  old.  We  have  tennis,  golf,  picnics, 
sails,  and  constant  jollification,  but  I 
don't  seem  to  enjoy  it  all  as  I  did  last 
summer.  It  is  n't  altogether  homesick- 
115 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

ness,  though  that  is  chronic,  it  is  a  con 
stant  longing  for  I  don't  know  what. 

Viewed  impersonally,  the  world  is 
a  rattling  good  show,  but  instead  of 
smiling  at  it  from  the  front  row  in  the 
dress  circle,  I  get  to  be  one  of  the  per 
formers  every  time. 

We  have  been  greatly  interested  in 
watching  the  Russians  build  a  fort  on 
one  of  their  islands  near  here.  They 
insist  there  will  be  no  war  and  at  the 
same  time  they  are  mining  the  harbor 
and  building  forts  day  and  night.  The 
minute  it  is  dark  the  searchlights  are 
kept  busy  sweeping  the  harbor  in 
search  of  something  not  strictly  Rus 
sian.  I  hope  I  will  get  back  as  safely 
as  I  got  here. 

Did  I  tell  you  that  I  stopped  over 

two  days  in  Korea!    I  had  often  heard 

of  the  Jumping  Off  Place,  but  I  never 

expected  to  actually  see  it !    The  people 

116 


**, 

The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

live  in  the  most  awful  little  mud  houses, 
and  their  poverty  is  appalling.  No 
streets,  no  roads,  no  anything  save  a 
fog  of  melancholy  that  seems  to  en 
velop  everything.  The  terrible  help 
lessness  of  the  people,  their  ignorance, 
and  isolation  are  terrible. 

The  box  from  home  was  more  than 
satisfactory.  I  have  thoroughly  en 
joyed  wearing  all  the  pretty  things. 
The  hat  sister  sent  was  about  the  size 
of  a  turn-table ;  a  strong  hat  pin  and  a 
slight  breeze  will  be  all  I  need  to  travel 
to  No  Man's  Land.  'Sister  says  it  's 
moderate,  save  the  mark!  but  it  re 
ally  is  becoming  and  when  I  get  it  on, 
my  face  looks  like  a  pink  moon  emerg 
ing  from  a  fleecy  black  cloud.  I  had 
to  practice  wearing  it  in  private  until 
I  learned  to  balance  it  properly. 

I  shall  stay  up  here  through  July 
and  then  I  am  thinking  of  going  to 
117 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

Shanghai  with  Mrs.  Heath 's  sister,  who 
lives  there.  I  am  very  fond  of  her,  and 
I  know  I  would  have  a  good  time.  I 
feel  a  little  like  a  subscription  list,  being 
passed  around  this  way,  but  I  simply 
have  to  keep  going  every  minute  when 
I  am  not  at  work. 

They  are  calling  up  to  me  from  the 
tennis  court  so  I  must  stop  for  the 
present. 

SHANGHAI,  CHINA,  August,  1903. 

The  mail  goes  out  this  morning  and 
I  am  determined  to  get  this  letter 
written  if  I  break  up  a  dozen  parties. 
As  you  see,  I  am  in  Shanghai,  this 
wonderful  big  understudy  for  Chicago, 
which  seems  about  as  incongruous  in 
its  surroundings  as  a  silk  hat  on  a  hay 
stack  !  There  are  beautiful  boulevards, 
immense  houses,  splendid  public  gar- 
118 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

dens,  all  hedged  in  by  a  yellow  mass 
of  orientals. 

Every  nationality  is  represented 
here,  and  people  meet,  mingle,  and  sep 
arate  in  an  ever  changing  throng.  At 
every  corner  stands  a  tall  majestic 
Sikh,  with  head  bound  in  yards  of 
crimson  cloth,  directing  the  movements 
of  the  crowd.  Down  the  street  comes 
a  regiment  of  English  soldiers,  so  big 
and  determined  that  one  well  under 
stands  their  victories.  The  ubiquitous 
Russian  makes  himself  known  at  every 
turn,  silent  and  grave,  but  in  his  sim 
plest  dealings  as  merciless  and  greedy 
as  the  country  he  represents.  French 
men  and  Germans,  and  best  of  all,  the 
unquenchable  American,  join  in  the 
panorama,  and  the  result  is  something 
that  one  does  not  see  anywhere  else  on 
the  globe.  I  guess  if  my  dear  brethren 
knew  of  the  theatre  parties,  dinners 
119 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

and  dances  I  was  going  to,  they  would 
think  I  was  on  a  toboggan  slide  for  the 
lower  regions!  I  am  not  though.  I 
am  simply  getting  a  good  swing  to  the 
pendulum  so  that  I  can  go  back  to  * '  the 
field,"  and  the  baby  organs  and  the 
hymn-singing  with  better  grace.  It  is 
very  funny,  but  do  you  know  that  for 
a  steady  diet  I  can  stand  the  saints 
much  better  than  I  can  the  sinners! 

My  friends  the  Carters  live  right  on 
the  Bund  facing  the  water.  They  keep 
lots  of  horses  and  many  servants,  and 
live  in  a  luxury  that  only  the  East  can 
offer.  Every  morning  before  I  am  up 
a  slippery  Chinese,  all  done  up  in  liv 
ery,  comes  to  my  room  and  solemnly 
announces:  ''Missy  bath  allee  ready, 
nice  morning,  good-bye."  From  that 
time  on  I  am  scarcely  allowed  to  carry 
my  pocket  handkerchief  1 
120 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

The  roads  about  here  are  perfect, 
and  we  drive  for  hours  past  big  coun 
try  houses,  all  built  in  English  fashion. 
There  is  one  grewsome  feature  in  the 
landscape,  however,  and  that  is  the 
Chinese  graves.  In  the  fields,  in  the 
back  and  front  yards,  on  the  highways, 
any  bare  space  that  is  large  enough  to 
set  a  box  and  cover  it  with  a  little  earth, 
serves  as  a  burying  ground. 

I  am  interested  in  it  all,  and  enjoy 
ing  it  in  a  way,  but,  Mate,  there  is  no 
use  fibbing  to  you,  there  is  a  restless 
ness  in  my  heart  that  sometimes  almost 
drives  me  crazy.  There  is  nothing  un 
der  God's  sun  that  can  repay  a  woman 
for  the  loss  of  love  and  home.  It  'a 
all  right  to  love  humanity,  but  I  was 
born  a  specialist.  The  past  is  torn  out 
by  the  roots  but  the  awful  emptiness 
remains.  I  am  not  grieving  over  what 
121 


The  Lady  ot  the  Decoration 

has  been,  but  what  is  n't.  That  last 
sentence  sounds  malarial,  I  am  going 
right  upstairs  to  take  a  quinine  pill. 


SOOCHOW,  August,  1903. 

Well,  Mate,  this  is  the  first  letter  I 
have  really  written  you  from  China. 
Shanghai  does  n't  count.  Soochow  is 
the  real  article.  The  unspeakable 
quantity  and  quality  of  dirt  surpasses 
anything  I  have  ever  imagined.  Dirt 
and  babies,  there  are  millions  of  babies, 
under  your  feet,  around  your  heels,  ev 
ery  nook  and  corner  full  of  babies. 

From  Shanghai  to  Soochow  is  only 
a  one  night  trip,  and  as  I  had  an  invita 
tion  to  come  up  for  over  Sunday,  I  de 
cided  to  take  advantage  of  it.  You 
would  have  to  see  the  boat  I  came  in 
to  appreciate  it.  They  call  it  a  house 
boat,  but  it  is  built  on  a  pattern  that 
122 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

is  new  to  me.  In  the  lower  part  are 
rooms,  each  of  which  is  supplied  with 
a  board  on  which  you  are  supposed  to 
sleep.  Each  passenger  carries  his  own 
bedding  and  food.  In  the  upper  part 
of  the  boat  is  a  sort  of  loft  just  high 
enough  for  a  man  to  sit  up,  and  in  it 
are  crowded  hundreds  of  the  common 
people.  A  launch  tows  seven  or  eight 
of  these  house-boats  at  a  time.  I  will 
not  ask  you  to  even  imagine  the  condi 
tion  of  them ;  I  had  to  stand  it  because 
I  was  there,  but  you  are  not. 

It  was  just  at  sunset  when  we  left 
Shanghai,  and  I  got  as  far  away  from 
the  crowd  as  I  could  and  tried  to  for 
get  my  unsavory  surroundings.  The 
sails  of  thousands  of  Chinese  vessels 
loomed  black  and  big  against  the  red 
sky  as  they  floated  silently  by  without 
a  ripple.  In  the  dim  light,  I  read  on 
the  prow  of  a  bulky  schooner,  "  'The 
123 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

Mary',  Boston,  U.S.A."  Do  you  know 
how  my  heart  leapt  out  to  ' '  The  Mary, 
Boston,  U.S.A."?  It  was  the  one  thing 
in  all  that  vast,  unfamiliar  world  that 
spoke  my  tongue. 

When  I  went  to  my  room,  I  found 
that  a  nice  little  Chinese  girl  in  a  long 
sack  coat  and  shiny  black  trousers  was 
to  share  it  with  me.  I  must  confess 
that  I  was  relieved  for  I  was  lonesome 
and  a  bit  nervous,  and  when  I  discov 
ered  that  she  knew  a  little  English  I 
could  have  hugged  her.  We  spread 
our  cold  supper  on  the  top  of  my  dress 
suit  case,  put  our  one  candle  in  the  cen 
ter,  and  proceeded  to  feast.  Little  Miss 
Izy  was  not  as  shy  as  she  looked,  and 
what  she  lacked  in  vocabulary  she  made 
up  in  enthusiasm.  We  got  into  a  gale 
of  laughter  over  our  efforts  to  under 
stand  each  other,  and  she  was  as  cur 
ious  about  my  costume  as  I  was  about 
124 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

hers.  She  watched  me  undress  with 
unfeigned  amusement,  following  the 
lengthy  process  carefully,  then  she 
rose,  untied  a  string,  stepped  out  of 
her  coat  and  trousers,  stood  for  a  mo 
ment  in  a  white  suit  made  exactly  like 
her  outer  garments,  then  gaily  kicked 
off  her  tiny  slippers  and  rolled  over  in 
bed.  I  don 't  know  if  this  is  a  universal 
custom  in  China,  but  at  any  rate,  little 
Miss  Izy  will  never  be  like  the  old  lady, 
who  committed  suicide  because  she  was 
so  tired  of  buttoning  and  unbuttoning. 
The  next  morning  we  were  in  Soo- 
chow,  at  least  outside  of  the  city  wall. 
They  say  the  wall  is  over  two  thousand 
years  old  and  it  certainly  looks  it,  and 
the  spaces  on  top  left  for  the  guns  to 
point  through  make  it  look  as  if  it  had 
lost  most  of  its  teeth.  Things  are  so 
old  in  this  place,  Mate,  that  I  feel  as  if 
I  had  just  been  born!  I  have  nearly 
125 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

run  my  legs  off  sightseeing;  big  pago 
das  and  little  pagodas,  Mamma  Budd- 
has  and  Papa  Buddhas,  and  baby 
Buddhas,  all  of  whom  look  exactly  like 
their  first  cousins  in  Japan. 

Soochow  is  just  a  collection  of  nar 
row  alley-ways  over  which  the  house 
tops  meet,  and  through  which  the 
people  swarm  by  the  millions,  sellers 
crying  their  wares,  merchants  urging 
patronage,  children  screaming,  beg 
gars  displaying  their  infirmities,  and 
through  it  all  coolies  carrying  sedan 
chairs  scattering  the  crowd  before 
them. 

In  many  of  the  temples,  the  priests 
hang  wind  bells  to  frighten  the  evil 
spirits  away.  I  think  it  is  a  needless 
precaution,  for  it  would  only  be  a 
feeble-minded  spirit  that  would  ever 
want  to  return  to  China  once  it  had 
gotten  away! 

126 


The  Lady  of  the   Decoration 


HIROSHIMA,  October,  1903. 

In  harness  again  and  glad  of  it. 
I  Ve  opened  the  third  kindergarten 
with  the  money  from  home ;  it 's  only 
a  little  one,  eighteen  children  in  all,  and 
there  were  seventy-five  applicants,  but 
it  is  a  beginning.  You  ought  to  see 
the  mothers  crowding  around,  begging 
and  pleading  for  their  children  to  be 
taken  in,  and  the  little  tots  weep  and 
wail  when  they  have  to  go  home.  I 
feel  to-day  as  if  I  would  almost  resort 
to  highway  robbery  to  get  money 
enough  to  carry  on  this  work! 

My  training  class  is  just  as  interest 
ing  as  it  can  be.  When  the  girls  came 
to  me  two  years  ago  they  were  in  the 
Third  Header.  With  two  exceptions, 
I  have  given  them  everything  that  was 
included  in  my  own  course  at  home, 
127 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

and  taught  them  English  besides. 
They  are  very  ambitious,  and  what  do 
you  suppose  is  their  chief  aim  in  life? 
To  study  until  they  know  as  much  as 
I  do!  Oh!  Mate,  it  makes  me  want 
to  hide  my  head  in  shame,  when  I  think 
of  all  the  opportunities  I  wasted.  You 
know  only  too  well  what  a  miserable 
little  rubbish  pile  of  learning  I  possess, 
but  what  you  don't  know  is  how  I  have 
studied  and  toiled  and  burned  the  mid 
night  tallow  in  trying  to  work  over 
those  old  odds  and  ends  into  something 
useful  for  my  girls.  If  they  have  made 
such  progress  under  a  superficial, 
shallow-pated  thing  like  me,  what 
would  they  have  done  under  a  woman 
with  brains? 

I  wish  you  could  look  in  on  me  to 
night  sitting  here  surrounded  by  all 
my   household    goods.      The    room   is 
bright  and  cozy,  and  just  at  present 
128 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

I  have  a  room-mate.  It  is  a  little  sick 
girl  from  the  training  class,  whom  I 
have  taken  care  of  since  I  came  back. 
She  belongs  to  a  very  poor  family  down 
in  the  country,  her  mother  is  dead,  and 
her  home  life  is  very  unhappy.  She 
nearly  breaks  her  heart  crying  when 
we  speak  of  sending  her  home,  and 
begs  me  to  help  her  get  well  so  she  can 
go  on  with  her  studies. 

Of  course  she  is  a  great  care,  but 
I  get  up  a  little  earlier  and  go  to  bed 
a  little  later,  and  so  manage  to  get  it 
all  in. 

We  are  getting  quite  stirred  up  over 
the  war  clouds  that  are  hanging  over 
this  little  water-color  country.  Savage 
old  Russia  is  doing  a  lot  of  bullying, 
and  the  Japanese  are  not  going  to  stand 
much  more.  They  are  drilling  and 
marching  and  soldiering  now  for  all 
they  are  worth.  From  Kuri,  the  naval 
129 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

station,  we  can  hear  the  thunder  of  the 
guns  which  are  in  constant  practice. 
Out  on  the  parade  grounds,  in  the  bar 
racks,  on  every  country  road  prepara 
tion  is  going  on.  Officers  high  in  rank 
and  from  the  Emperor's  guard  are 
here  reviewing  the  troops.  Those  who 
know  say  a  crash  is  bound  to  come. 
So  if  you  hear  of  me  in  a  red  cross 
uniform  at  the  front,  you  need  n't  be 
surprised. 

HIROSHIMA,  November,  1903. 

My  dear  old  Mate : 

I  am  just  tired  enough  to-night  to 
fold  my  hands,  and  turn  up  my  toes 
and  say  "Enough."  If  overcoming 
difficulties  makes  character,  then  I  will 
have  as  many  characters  as  the  Chinese 
alphabet  by  the  time  I  get  through. 
The  bothers  meet  me  when  the  girl 
130 


makes  the  fire  in  the  morning  and  puts 
the  ashes  in  the  grate  instead  of  the 
coal,  and  they  keep  right  along  with 
me  all  day  until  I  go  to  bed  at  night 
and  find  the  sheet  under  the  mattress 
and  the  pillows  at  the  foot. 

It  would  n  't  be  near  so  hard  if  I  could 
charge  around,  and  let  off  a  little  of 
my  wrath,  but  no,  I  must  be  nice  and 
sweet  and  polite  and  never  forget  that 
I  am  an  Example. 

Have  you  ever  seen  these  dolls  that 
have  a  weight  in  them,  so  that  you  can 
push  them  over  and  they  stand  right 
up  again?  Well  I  have  a  large  one 
and  her  name  is  Susie  Damn.  When 
things  reach  the  limit  of  endurance,  I 
take  it  out  on  Susie  Damn.  I  box  her 
jaws  and  knock  her  over,  and  up  she 
comes  every  time  with  such  a  pleasant 
smile  that  I  get  in  a  good  humor  again. 

What  is  the  matter  with  you  at  home ! 
131 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

Why  don't  you  write  to  me?  I  used 
to  get  ten  and  twelve  letters  every 
mail,  and  now  if  I  get  one  I  am  ready 
to  cry  for  joy.  Because  I  am  busy 
does  not  mean  that  I  have  n't  time  to 
be  lonely.  Why,  Mate,  you  can  never 
know  what  loneliness  means  until  you 
are  entirely  away  from  everything  you 
love.  I  have  tried  to  be  brave  but  I 
have  n't  always  made  a  grand  success 
of  it.  What  I  have  suffered— well 
don't  let  me  talk  about  it.  As  Little 
Germany  says,  to  live  is  to  love,  and 
to  love  is  to  suffer.  And  yet  it  is  for 
that  love  we  are  ready  to  suffer  and 
die,  and  without  it  life  is  a  blank,  a 
sail  without  a  wind,  a  frame  without 
the  picture! 

Now  to-morrow  I  may  get  one  of 

your  big  letters,  and  you  will  tell  me 

how  grand  I  am,  and  how  my  soul  is 

developing,  etc.,  and  I  '11  get  such  a  stiff 

132 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

upper  lip  that  my  front  teeth  will  be 
in  danger.  It  takes  a  stiff  upper  lip, 
and  a  stiff  conscience,  and  a  stiff  every 
thing  else  to  keep  going  out  here! 

From  the  foregoing  outburst  you 
probably  think  I  am  pale  and  dejected. 
"No,  on  the  contrary,"  as  the  seasick 
Frenchman  said  when  asked  if  he  had 
dined.  I  am  hale  and  hearty,  and  I 
never  had  as  much  color  in  my  life. 
The  work  is  booming,  and  I  have  all 
sorts  of  things  to  be  thankful  for. 

Our  little  household  has  been  very 
much  upset  this  week  by  the  death  of 
our  cook.  The  funeral  took  place  last 
night  at  seven  o'clock  from  the  lodge 
house  at  the  gate.  The  shadows  made 
on  the  paper  screens  as  they  prepared 
him  for  burial,  told  an  uncanny  story. 
The  lack  of  delicacy,  the  coarseness, 
the  total  disregard  for  the  dignity  of 
death  were  all  pictured  on  the  doors. 
133 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

I  stood  in  the  chapel  and  watched  with 
a  sick  heart.  After  they  had  crowded 
the  poor  old  body  into  a  sitting  position 
in  a  sort  of  square  tub,  they  brought 
it  out  to  the  coolies  who  were  to  carry 
it  to  the  temple,  and  afterward  to  the 
crematory.  The  lanterns  flickered  with 
an  unsteady  light,  making  grotesque 
figures  that  seemed  to  dance  in  fiend 
ish  glee  on  the  grass.  The  men  laughed 
and  chattered,  and  at  last  shouldered 
their  burden  and  trotted  off  as  merrily 
as  if  they  were  going  to  a  matsuri. 
I  never  before  felt  the  cruelty  of  hea 
thenism  so  keenly.  No  punishment  in 
the  next  world  can  equal  the  things 
they  miss  in  this  life  by  a  lack  of  belief 
in  a  personal  God. 

It  must  be  very  beautiful  at  home 

about  this  time.    The  beech    trees  are 

all  green  and  gold,  and  the  maples  are 

blazing.     I  am  thinking  too  about  the 

134 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

shadows  on  the  old  ice-house.  I  know 
every  one  of  them  by  heart,  and  they 
often  come  to  haunt  me  as  do>  many 
other  shadows  of  the  sad,  sad  past. 


HIROSHIMA,  December,  1903. 

God  bless  you  honey,  I  Ve  got  a  holi 
day  and  I  Ve  sworn  vengeance  on  any 
one  who  comes  to  my  door  until  I  have 
written  my  Christmas  letters.  I  wish 
I  was  a  doctor  and  a  trained  nurse, 
and  a  scholar,  a  magician,  a  philos 
opher  and  a  saint  all  combined.  I 
need  them  in  my  business. 

I  have  spent  this  merry  Christmas 
season,  chasing  from  pillow  to  post 
with  bandages,  hot  water  bags,  poul 
tices  and  bottles.  "We  have  had  a  regu 
lar  hospital.  All  the  Christmas  money 
I  had  saved  to  buy  presents  for  home 
went  in  Cod  Liver  Oil,  and  Miss  Less- 
135 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

ing,  bless  her  soul,  is  doing  without 
a  coat  for  the  same  purpose.  When 
you  see  a  girl  struggling  for  what  little 
education  she  can  get,  and  know  what 
sacrifices  are  being  made  for  it,  you 
just  hate  your  frumpery  old  finery, 
and  you  want  to  convert  everything 
you  possess  into  cash  to  help  her.  All 
the  teachers  are  doing  without  fires  in 
their  rooms  this  winter,  and  it  is  rather 
chillsome  to  go  to  bed  cold  and  wake 
up  next  morning  in  the  same  condition. 
When  I  get  home  to  a  furnace-heated 
house  and  have  cream  in  my  coffee,  I 
shall  feel  too  dissipated  to  be  respect 
able! 

We  have  not  been  able  to  get  a  new 
cook  since  our  old  one  died,  and  the 
fact  must  have  gotten  abroad,  for  all 
the  floating  brethren  and  sisters  in 
Japan  have  been  to  see  us !  Y.M.C.A.  's, 
W.C.T.U.'s,  A.W.B.M.'s  and  X.Y.Z.'s 
136 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

have  sifted  in,  and  we  have  to  sit  up 
and  be  Marthas  and  Marys  all  at  the 
same  time! 

Sometimes  I  want  to  get  my  hat  and 
run  and  run  until  I  get  to  another 
planet.  But  I  am  not  made  of  the  stuff 
that  runs,  and  I  have  the  satisfaction 
of  knowing  that  I  have  stuck  to  my 
post.  If  sacrificing  self,  and  knocking 
longings  in  the  head,  and  smashing 
heart-aches  right  and  left,  do  not  pass 
me  through  the  Golden  Gate,  then  I  '11 
sue  Peter  for  damages. 

It  's  snowing  to-day,  but  the  old 
Earth  is  making  about  as  poor  a  bluff 
at  being  Christmasy  as  I  am.  The 
leaves  are  all  on  the  trees,  many  flowers 
are  in  bloom,  and  the  scarlet  geraniums 
are  warm  enough  to  melt  the  snow 
flakes. 

My  big  box  has  arrived  and  I  am 
keeping  it  until  to-morrow.  I  go  out 
137 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

and  sit  on  it  every  little  while  to  keep 
cheered  up.  This  is  my  third  Christ 
mas  from  home,  one  more  and  then—  ! 

There  has  been  too  much  sickness  to 
make  much  of  the  holiday,  but  I  have 
rigged  up  a  fish  pond  for  the  kinder 
garten  children,  and  each  kiddie  will 
have  a  present  that  cost  one-fourth  of 
a  cent!  I  wish  I  had  a  hundred  dol 
lars  to  spend  on  them ! 

To-night  when  the  lights  are  out,  my 
little  sick  girl's  stocking  will  hang  on 
one  bed  post,  and  mine  on  the  other. 
I  don't  believe  Santa  Glaus  will  have 
the  heart  to  pass  us  by,  do  you? 


HIROSHIMA,  January,  1904. 

Here  it  is  January  and  I  am  just 
thanking  you  dear  ones  for  my  beau 
tiful  Christmas  box.    As  you  probably 
guessed,  Mate,  our  Christmas  was  not 
138 


The  Lady  of  the   Decoration 

exactly  hilarious.  The  winter  has  been 
a  hard  one,  the  prospect  of  war  has 
sent  the  price  of  provisions  out  of 
sight,  the  sick  girls  in  the  school  have 
needed  medicine  and  fires,  so  altogether 
Miss  Lessing,  Miss  Dixon  and  I  have 
had  to  do  considerable  tugging  at  the 
ends  to  get  them  to  meet.  None  of  us 
have  bought  a  stitch  of  new  clothing 
this  winter,  so  when  our  boxes  came, 
we  were  positively  dazed  by  all  the 
grandeur. 

They  arrived  late  at  night  and  we 
got  out  of  bed  to  open  them.  The  first 
thing  I  struck  was  a  very  crumpled 
little  paper  doll,  with  baby  Bess'  name 
printed  in  topsy-turvy  letters  on  the 
back.  For  the  next  five  minutes  I  was 
kept  busy  swallowing  the  lumps  that 
came  in  my  throat,  but  Dixie  had  some 
peppermint  candy  out  of  her  box,  the 
first  I  had  seen  since  I  had  left  home, 
139 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

so  I  put  on  my  lovely  new  beaver  hat, 
which  with  my  low-necked  gown  and 
red  slippers  was  particularly  chic,  and 
I  sat  on  the  floor  and  ate  candy.  It— 
the  hat  and  the  candy  too,  went  a  long 
way  towards  restoring  my  equanimity, 
but  I  did  n't  dare  look  at  that  paper 
doll  again  that  night! 

You  ask  if  I  mind  wearing  that  beau 
tiful  crepe  de  chine  which  is  not  becom 
ing  to  you?  Well,  Mate,  I  suppose 
there  was  a  day  when  I  would  have 
scorned  anybody's  cast-off  clothes,  but 
I  pledge  you  my  word  a  queen  in  her 
coronation  robes  never  felt  half  so 
grand  as  I  feel  in  that  dress!  Some 
how  I  seem  to  assume  some  of  your 
personality,  I  look  tall  and  graceful  and 
dignified,  and  I  try  to  imagine  how  it 
feels  to  be  good  and  intellectual,  and 
fascinating,  and  besides  I  have  the  sat 
isfaction  of  knowing  that  I  am  rather 
140 


The  Lady  of  the   Decoration 

becoming  to  the  dress  myself!    It  fits 
without   a   wrinkle   and  next   summer 

with  my  big  black  hat, !    Well,  if 

Little  Germany  sees  me,  there  will  be 
something  doing! 

I  must  tell  you  an  experience  I  had 
the  other  day.  Miss  Lessing  and  I 
were  coming  back  on  the  train  from 
Miyajima  and  sitting  opposite  to  us 
was  an  old  couple  who  very  soon  told 
us  that  they  had  never  seen  foreigners 
before.  They  were  as  guileless  as  chil 
dren,  and  presently  the  old  man  came 
over  and  asked  if  he  might  look  at  my 
jacket.  I  had  no  objections,  so  he  put 
his  hands  lightly  on  my  shoulders  and 
turned  me  around  for  inspection. 
1  i  But, ' '  he  said  to  Miss  Lessing  in  Jap 
anese,  "how  does  she  get  into  it?"  I 
took  it  off  to  show  him  and  in  so  doing 
revealed  fresh  wonders.  He  returned 
to  his  wife,  and  after  a  long  consulta- 
141 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

tion,  and  many  inquiring  looks,  he  came 
back.  He  said  he  knew  he  was  a  great 
trouble,  but  I  was  most  honorably  kind, 
and  would  I  tell  him  why  I  wore  a  piece 
of  leather  about  my  waist,  and  would  1 
please  remove  my  dress  and  show  them 
how  I  put  it  on?  He  was  distinctly  dis 
appointed  when  I  declined,  but  he  man 
aged  to  get  in  one  more  question  and 
that  was  if  we  slept  in  our  hats.  When 
he  got  off,  he  assured  us  that  he  had 
never  seen  anything  so  interesting  in 
his  life,  and  he  would  have  great  things 
to  tell  the  people  of  his  village. 

There  is  n't  a  place  you  go,  or  a 
thing  you  do  out  here  that  does  n't  af 
ford  some  kind  of  amusement. 

The  first  glamour  of  the  country  has 
gotten  dimmed  a  bit,  not  that  the  in 
terest  has  waned  for  a  moment,  but  I 
have  come  to  see  that  the  beauty  and 
picturesqueness  are  largely  on  the  sur- 
142 


The  Lady  of  the   Decoration 

face.  If  ever  I  have  to  distribute 
tracts  in  another  world,  I  am  going  to 
wrap  a  piece  of  soap  in  every  one,  for 
I  am  more  and  more  convinced  that 
the  surest  way  to  heaven  for  the  hea 
then  is  the  Soapy  Way. 

During  the  holidays  I  tried  to  study 
up  a  little  and  add  a  drop  or  two  to 
that  gray  matter  that  is  supposed  to 
be  floating  around  in  my  brain.  But 
as  a  girl  said  of  a  child  in  Kinder 
garten,  "my  intelligence  was  not  work 
ing."  Putting  Psychology  into  easy 
terms,  stopping  to  explain  things  I  do 
not  understand  very  well  myself, 
struggling  through  the  medium  of  a 
strange  language,  and  trying  to  occi- 
dentalize  the  oriental  mind  has  been  a 
stiff  proposition  for  one  whose  learn 
ing  was  never  her  long  suit!  When 
I  come  home  I  may  be  nothing  but  a 
giggly,  childishly  happy  old  lady,  who 
143 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

does  n't  care  a  rap  whether  her  skin 
fits  or  not. 

The  prospect  of  war  is  getting  more 
and  more  serious.  Out  in  the  Inland 
Sea,  the  war  ships  are  hastening  here 
and  there  on  all  sorts  of  secret  mis 
sions.  I  hope  with  all  my  heart  there 
will  not  be  war,  but  if  there  is,  I  hope 
Japan  will  wipe  Russia  right  off  the 
map! 

HIEOSHIMA,  February,  1904. 
Dear  old  Mate : 

I  am  breathless!  For  three  weeks 
I  ha.ve  had  a  chase  up  hill  and  down 
dale,  to  the  top  of  pine  clad  moun 
tains,  into  the  misty  shadows  of  the 
deep  valleys,  up  and  down  the  silvery 
river,  to  and  fro  on  the  frosty  road. 
For  why?  All  because  I  had  lost  my 
"poise/'  that  treasured  possession 
which  yon  said  I  was  to  hang  on  to 
144 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

as  I  do  to  my  front  teeth  and  my  hair. 
So  when  I  found  it  was  gone,  I  started 
in  full  pursuit.  Never  a  sight  of  its 
coat  tails  did  I  catch  until  Sunday, 
when  I  gave  up  the  race  and  sat  me 
down  to  fight  out  the  old  fight  of  re 
bellion,  and  kicking  against  the  pricks. 

It  was  a  perfect  day,  the  plum  trees 
were  white  with  blossom,  the  spice 
bushes  heavy  with  fragrance,  the  river 
dancing  for  joy,  and  the  whole  earth 
springing  into  new,  tender  life.  A 
saucy  little  bird  sat  on  an  old  stone 
lantern,  and  sang  straight  at  me.  He 
told  me  I  was  a  whiney  young  person, 
that  it  was  lots  more  fun  to  catch 
worms  and  fly  around  in  the  sunshine 
than  it  was  to  sit  in  the  house  and 
mope.  He  actually  laughed  at  me,  and 
I  seized  my  hat  and  lit  out  after  him, 
and  when  I  came  home  I  found  I  had 
caught  my  "poise." 

To-day   in   class  I   asked  my   girls 

10  145   ' 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

what  "happiness"  meant.  One  new 
girl  looked  up  timidly  and  said,  "Sen- 
sei,  I  sink  him  just  mean  you.'7  I  felt 
like  a  hypocrite,  but  it  pleased  me  to 
know  that  on  the  outside  at  least  I  kept 
shiny. 

I  tell  you  if  I  don't  find  my  real 
self  out  here,  if  I  don't  see  my  own 
soul  in  all  its  bareness  and  weakness 
then  I  will  never  see  it.  At  home 
hedged  in  by  conventionality,  custom, 
and  the  hundred  little  interests  of  our 
daily  life,  we  have  small  chance  to  see 
ourselves  as  we  really  are,  but  in  a 
foreign  land  stripped  bare  of  every 
thing  in  the  world  save  self,  in  a  lone 
liness  as  great  sometimes  as  the  grave, 
face  to  face  with  new  conditions,  new 
demands,  we  have  ample  chance  to  take 
our  own  measurement.  I  cannot  say 
that  the  result  obtained  is  calculated  to 
make  one  conceited! 
146 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

I  fit  into  this  life  out  here,  like  a 
square  peg  in  a  round  hole.  I  am  not 
consecrated,  I  was  never  ' '  called  to  the 
foreign  field,"  I  love  the  world  and 
the  flesh  even  if  I  don't  care  especially 
for  the  devil,  I  don't  believe  the  Lord 
makes  the  cook  steal  so  I  may  be  more 
patient,  and  I  don't  pray  for  wisdom 
in  selecting  a  new  pair  of  shoes.  When 
my  position  becomes  unbearable,  I  in 
variably  face  the  matter  frankly  and 
remind  myself  that  if  it  is  hard  on  the 
peg,  it  is  just  as  hard  on  the  hole,  and 
that  if  they  can  stand  it  I  guess  I  can ! 

You  ask  about  my  reading.  Yes,  I 
read  every  spare  minute  I  can  get,  be 
fore  breakfast,  on  my  way  to  classes, 
and  after  I  go  to  bed.  Somebody  at 
home  sends  me  the  magazines  regu 
larly  and  I  keep  them  going  for  months. 

By  the  way  I  wish  you  would  write 
and  tell  me  just  exactly  how  Jack  is. 
147 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

You  said  he  was  working  too  hard  and 
that  he  looked  all  fagged  out.  Was  n't 
it  exactly  like  him  to  back  out  of  going 
South  on  account  of  his  conscience  1  He 
would  laugh  at  us  for  saying  it  was 
that,  but  it  was.  He  may  be  unrelig- 
ious,  and  scoff  at  churches  and  all  that, 
but  he  has  the  most  rigid,  cast-iron, 
inelastic  conscience  that  I  ever  came 
across.  I  wish  he  would  take  a  rest. 
You  see  out  here,  so  far  away  from 
you  all,  I  can't  help  worrying  when 
any  of  you  are  the  least  bit  sick.  Jack 
has  been  on  my  mind  for  days.  Don't 
tell  him  that  I  asked  you  to,  but  won't 
you  get  him  to  go  away?  He  would 
curl  his  hair  if  you  'asked  him  to. 

Preparations  for  war  are  still  in 
progress  and  it  makes  a  fellow  pretty 
shivery  to  see  it  coming  closer  and 
closer.  Hiroshima  will  be  the  center  of 
military  movements  and  of  course  un- 
148 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

der  military  law.  It  will  affect  us  only 
as  to  the  restrictions  put  on  our  walks 
and  places  we  can  go.  With  the  city 
so  full  of  strange  soldiers,  I  don't  sup 
pose  we  will  want  to  go  much.  Two 
big  war  ships,  which  Japan  has  just 
bought  from  Chili  are  on  their  way 
from  Shanghai.  Regiment  after  regi 
ment  has  poured  into  Hiroshima  and 
embarked  again  for  Corea.  I  am  ter 
ribly  thrilled  over  it  all,  and  the  Japan 
ese  watch  my  enthusiasm  with  their 
non-committal  eyes  and  never  say  a 
word! 

My  poor  little  sick  girl  grows  weaker 
all  the  time.  She  is  a  constant  care 
and  anxiety,  but  she  has  no  money 
and  I  cannot  send  her  back  to  her 
wretched  home.  The  teachers  think  I 
am  very  foolish  to  let  the  thing  run 
on,  and  I  suppose  I  am.  She  can  never 
be  any  better,  and  she  may  live  this 
149 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

way  for  months.  But  when  she  clings 
to  me  with  her  frail  hands  and  declares 
she  is  better  and  will  soon  get  well  if 
I  will  only  let  her  stay  with  me,  my 
heart  fails  me.  I  have  patched  up  an 
old  steamer  chair  for  her,  and  made 
a  window  garden,  and  tried  to  make 
the  room  as  bright  as  possible.  She 
has  to  stay  by  herself  nearly  all  day, 
but  she  is  so  patient  and  gentle  that 
I  never  hear  a  complaint.  This 
morning  she  pressed  my  hand  to  her 
breast  and  said  wistfully,  "Sensei,  it 
makes  sorry  to  play  all  the  time  with 
the  health." 

Miss  Lessing  tried  to  get  her  in  the 
hospital  but  they  will  not  take  incur 
ables. 

Somehow    Jack's    hospital    scheme 

does  n't  seem  as  foolish  as  it  did.    If 

there  are  other  children  in  the  world 

as   friendless   and   dependent   as  this 

150 


The  Lady  of  the    Decoration 

one,  then  making  a  permanent  home 
for  them  would  be  worth  all  the  great 
careers  in  the  world. 


HIKOSHIMA,  March,  1904. 

My  Best  Girl: 

Don't  I  wish  you  were  here  to  share 
all  these  thrills  with  me !  War  is  actu 
ally  in  progress,  and  if  you  could  see 
me  hanging  out  of  the  window  at  mid 
night  yelling  for  a  special,  then  chas 
ing  madly  around  to  get  someone  to 
translate  it  for  me,  see  me  dancing  in 
fiendish  glee  at  every  victory  won  by 
this  brave  little  country,  you  would 
conclude  that  I  am  just  as  young  as  I 
used  to  be.  I  tell  you  I  could  n't  be 
prouder  of  my  own  country!  Just 
think  of  plucky  little  old  Japan  win 
ning  three  battles  from  those  big, 
151 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

brutal,  conceited  Russians.  Why  I  just 
want  to  run  and  hug  the  Emperor! 

And  the  school  girls!  Why  their 
placid  faces  are  positively  glorified  by 
the  fire  of  patriotism.  Once  a  week 
a  trained  nurse  comes  to  give  talks  on 
nursing,  and  if  I  go  into  any  corner 
afterward,  I  find  a  group  of  girls  prac 
tising  all  kinds  of  bandaging.  Even 
the  demurest  little  maiden  cherishes 
the  hope  that  some  fate  may  send  her 
to  the  battle-field,  or  that  in  some  way 
she  may  be  permitted  to  serve  her 
country. 

I  am  afraid  I  am  not  very  strict 
about  talking  in  class  these  days,  but, 
somehow,  courage,  nobility,  and  self- 
sacrifice  seem  just  as  worthy  of  atten 
tion  as  " motor  ideas,"  and  "appercep 
tions." 

A  British  guest  who  hates  everything 
Japanese  says  my  enthusiasm  "is  quite 
152 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

annoying,  you  know,"  but,  dear  me,  I 
don't  mind  him.  What  could  you  ex 
pect  of  a  person  who  eats  pie  with  a 
spoon?  Why  my  enthusiasm  is  just 
cutting  its  eye-teeth !  The  whole  coun 
try  is  a-thrill,  and  even  a  wooden  In 
dian  would  get  excited. 

Every  afternoon  we  walk  down  on 
the  sea  wall  and  watch  the  preparations 
going  on  for  a  long  siege.  Hundreds 
of  big  ships  fill  the  harbor  to  say  noth 
ing  of  the  small  ones,  and  there  are 
thousands  of  coolies  working  like  mad. 
I  could  tell  you  many  interesting 
things,  but  I  am  afraid  of  the  censor. 
If  he  deciphers  all  my  letters  home,  he 
will  probably  have  nervous  prostra 
tion  by  the  time  the  war  is  over. 

Many  of  the  war  ships   are  coaled 

by  women  who  carry  heavy  baskets  on 

each  end  of  a  pole  swung  across  the 

shoulder,    and   invariably   a   baby   on 

153 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

their  backs.  It  is  something  terrible 
the  way  the  women  work,  often  pulling 
loads  that  would  require  a  horse  at 
home.  They  go  plodding  past  us  on 
the  road,  dressed  as  men,  mouth  open, 
eyes  straining,  all  intelligence  and  in 
terest  gone  from  their  faces. 

One  day  as  Miss  Lessing  and  I  were 
resting  by  the  roadside,  one  of  these 
women  stopped  for  breath  just  in  front 
of  us.  She  was  pushing  a  heavy  cart 
and  her  poor  old  body  was  trembling 
from  the  strain.  Her  legs  were  bare, 
and  her  feet  were  cut  by  the  stones. 
There  was  absolute  stolidity  in  her 
weather-beaten  face,  and  the  hands  that 
lighted  her  pipe  were  gnarled  and 
black.  Miss  Lessing  has  a  perfect  gen 
ius  for  getting  at  people,  I  think  it  is 
her  good  kind  face  through  which  her 
soul  shines.  She  asked  the  old  woman 
if  she  was  very  tired.  The  woman 
looked  up,  as  if  seeing  us  for  the  first 
154 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

time  and  nodded  her  head.  Then  a 
queer  look  came  into  her  face  and  she 
asked  Miss  Lessing  if  we  were  the  kind 
of  people  who  had  a  new  God.  Miss 
Lessing  told  her  we  were  Christians. 
With  a  wistfulness  that  I  have  never 
seen  except  in  the  eyes  of  a  dog,  she 
said,  "If  I  paid  your  God  with  offer 
ing  and  prayers,  do  you  think  he  would 
make  my  work  easier  ?  I  am  so  tired ! ' ' 
Miss  Lessing  made  her  sit  down  by  her 
on  the  grass,  and  talked  to  her  in  Jap 
anese  about  the  new  God  who  did  not 
take  any  pay  for  his  help,  and  who 
could  put  something  in  her  heart  that 
would  give  her  strength  to  bear  any 
burden.  I  could  not  understand  much 
of  what  they  said  but  I  had  a  little 
prayer-meeting  all  by  myself. 


HIKOSHIMA,  April,  1904. 

Yesterday  the  American  mail  came 
155 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

after  a  three  weeks'  delay.  None  of 
us  were  good  for  anything  the  rest  of 
the  day.  Twenty  letters  and  fifty-two 
papers  for  me!  Do  you  wonder  that 
I  almost  danced  a  hole  in  the  parlor 
rug? 

The  home  news  was  all  so  bright 
and  cheery,  and  your  letter  was  such 
a  bunch  of  comfort  that  I  felt  like  a 
two  year  old.  It  was  exactly  like  you 
to  think  out  that  little  farm  party  and 
get  Jack  into  it  as  a  matter  of  accom 
modation  to  you.  I  followed  every 
thing  you  did,  with  the  keenest  interest, 
from  the  all-day  tramps  in  the  woods, 
to  the  cozy  evenings  around  the  log 
fire.  I  can  see  old  Jack  now,  at  first 
bored  to  death  but  resolved  to  die  if 
need  be  on  the  altar  of  friendship, 
gradually  warming  up  as  he  always 
does  out  of  doors,  and  ending  up  by 
being  the  life  of  the  party.  He  once 
told  me  that  social  success  is  the  infinite 
156 


The  Lady  of  the   Decoration 

capacity  for  being  bored.  I  know  the 
little  outing  did  him  a  world  of  good, 
and  you  are  all  the  trumps  in  the  deck 
as  usual. 

Who  is  the  Dr.  Leet  that  was  in  the 
party!  I  remember  dancing  a  cotillon 
with  a  very  good  looking  youth  of  that 
name  in  the  prehistoric  ages.  He  was 
a  senior  at  Yale,  very  rich  and  very 
good  looking.  I  wore  his  fraternity 
pin  over  my  heart  for  a  whole  week 
afterward. 

We  have  been  having  great  fun  over 
the  American  accounts  of  the  war. 
Through  the  newspapers  we  learn  the 
most  marvelous  things  about  Japan 
and  her  people.  Large  cities  are  un- 
blushingly  moved  from  the  coast  to  an 
island  in  the  Inland  Sea,  troops  are 
passported  from  places  which  have 
no  harbor,  and  the  people  are  credited 
with  unheard  of  customs. 

We  are  still  in  the  midst  of  stirring 
157 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

times.  The  city  is  overflowing  with 
troops,  and  we  are  hemmed  in  on  every 
side  by  soldiers.  Of  course  foreign 
women  are  very  curious  to  them,  and 
they  often  follow  us  and  make  funny 
comments,  but  we  have  never  yet  had 
a  single  rudeness  shown  us.  In  all  the 
thousands  of  soldiers  stationed  here,  I 
have  only  seen  two  who  were  tipsy,  and 
they  were  mildly  hilarious  from  saki. 
There  is  perfect  order  and  discipline, 
and  after  nine  o'clock  at  night  the 
streets  are  as  quiet  as  a  mountain 
village. 

The  other  night,  five  of  the  soldiers, 
mere  boys,  donned  citizens'  dress  and 
went  out  for  a  lark.  At  roll-call  they 
were  missing  and  a  guard  was  sent  to 
search  for  them.  When  found,  they 
resisted  arrest  and  three  minutes  after 
they  all  answered  the  roll-call  in  an 
other  world. 

And  yet  although  the  discipline  is 
158 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

so  severe,  the  men  seem  a  contented 
and  happy  lot.  They  stroll  along  the 
roads  when  off  duty  hand  in  hand  like 
school  girls,  and  laugh  and  chatter  as 
if  life  were  a  big  holiday.  But  when 
the  time  comes  to  go  to  the  front,  they 
don  their  gay  little  uniforms,  and 
march  just  as  joyfully  away  to  give 
the  last  drop  of  their  blood  for  their 
Emperor. 

I  tell  you,  Mate,  I  want  to  get  out 
in  the  street  and  cheer  every  regiment 
that  passes!  No  drum,  no  fife,  no  in 
spiring  music  to  stir  their  blood  and 
strengthen  their  courage,  nothing  but 
the  unvarying  monotony  of  the  four 
note  trumpets.  They  don't  need  music 
to  make  them  go.  They  are  perfect 
little  machines  whose  motive  power  is 
a  patriotism  so  absolute,  so  complete, 
that  it  makes  death  on  the  battle-field 
an  honor  worthy  of  deification. 

I  look  out  into  the  play-ground,  and 
159 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

every  boy  down  to  the  smallest  baby 
in  the  kindergarten  is  armed  with  a 
bamboo  gun.  Such  drilling  and  march 
ing,  and  attacking  of  forts  you  have 
never  seen.  That  the  enemy  is  noth 
ing  more  than  sticks  stuck  at  all 
angles  matters  little.  An  enemy  there 
must  be,  and  the  worst  boy  in  Japan 
would  die  before  he  would  even  play 
at  being  a  Russian!  If  Kuropatkin 
could  see  just  one  of  these  awful  on 
slaughts,  he  would  run  up  the  white 
flag  and  hie  himself  to  safety.  So 
you  see  we  are  well  guarded  and  with 
quiet  little  soldiers  on  the  outside,  and 
very  noisy  and  fierce  little  soldiers  on 
the  inside,  we  fear  no  invasion  of  our 
peaceful  compound. 

On  my  walks  around  the  barracks, 

I  often  pass  the  cook  house,  and  watch 

the   food   being   carried   to   the   mess 

room.    The  rice  buckets,  about  the  size 

160 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

of  our  water  buckets,  are  put  on  a  pole 
in  groups  of  six  or  eight  and  carried 
on  the  shoulders  of  two  men.  There 
is  a  line  about  a  square  long  of  these 
buckets,  and  then  another  long  line  fol 
lows  with  trays  of  soup  bowls.  Tea 
is  not  as  a  rule  drunk  with  the  meals, 
but  after  the  last  grain  of  rice  has  been 
chased  from  the  slippery  sides  of  the 
bowl,  hot  water  is  poured  in  and  sipped 
with  loud  appreciation. 

Last  Sunday  afternoon  we  had  to 
entertain  ten  officers  of  high  rank,  and 
it  proved  a  regular  lark.  Their  Eng 
lish  and  our  Japanese  got  fatally 
twisted.  One  man  took  great  pride  in 
showing  me  how  much  too  big  his 
clothes  were,  giving  him  ample  oppor 
tunity  to  put  on  several  suits  of  under 
wear  in  cold  weather;  he  said  "Many 
cloth  dese  trusers  hab,  no  fit  like  'Mer- 
ican."  They  were  delighted  with  all 
11  161 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

our  foreign  possessions,  and  inspected 
everything  minutely.  On  leaving,  one 
officer  bowed  low,  and  assured  me  that 
he  would  never  see  me  on  earth  again, 
but  he  hoped  he  would  see  me  in  heaven 
first  I 

The  breezes  from  China  waft  an 
occasional  despairing  epistle  from 
Little  Germany,  but  they  find  me  as 
cold  as  a  snow  bank  on  the  north  side 
of  a  mountain.  The  sun  that  melts  my 
heart  will  have  to  rise  in  the  west,  and 
get  up  early  at  that. 

HIROSHIMA,  May,  1904. 

Well  commencement  is  over  and  my 
first  class  is  graduated.  Now  if  you 
have  ever  heard  of  anything  more  ridi 
culous  than  that  please  cable  me!  If 
yon  could  have  seen  me  standing  on 
the  platform  dealing  out  diplomas,  you 
would  have  been  highly  edified. 
162 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

Last  night  I  gave  the  class  a  dinner, 
There  were  fourteen  girls,  onjy  two 
of  whom  had  ever  been  at  a  foreign 
table  before.  At  first  they  were  ter 
ribly  embarrassed,  but  before  long 
they  warmed  up  to  the  occasion  and 
got  terribly  tickled  over  their  awkward 
ness.  I  was  afraid  they  would  knock 
their  teeth  out  with  the  knives  and 
forks,  and  the  feat  of  getting  soup  from 
the  spoon  to  the  mouth  proved  so  diffi 
cult  that  I  let  them  drink  it  from  the 
bowl.  Sitting  in  chairs  was  as  hard  for 
them  as  sitting  on  the  floor  for  me,  so 
between  the  courses  we  had  a  kind!  of 
cake  walk. 

Next  week  school  begins  again,  and 
I  start  three  new  kindergartens,  mak 
ing  seven  over  which  I  have  super 
vision.  I  am  so  pleased  over  the  pro 
gress  of  my  work  that  I  don't  know 
what  to  do.  Not  that  I  don't  realize 
my  limitations,  heaven  knows  I  do. 
163 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

Imagine  my  efforts  at  teaching  the 
training  class  psychology!  The  other 
day  we  were  struggling  with  the  sub 
ject  of  reflex  action,  and  one  of  the 
girls  handed  in  this  definition  as  she 
had  understood  it  from  me!  "Reflex 
action  is  of  a  activity  nervous.  It  is 
sometimes  the  don't  understand  of 
what  it  is  doing  and  stops  many  mes 
sages  to  the  brain  and  sends  the  mo 
tion  to  the  legs."  What  little  know 
ledge  I  start  with  gets  cross-eyed  be 
fore  I  get  through. 

The  Japanese  can  twist  the  English 
language  into  some  of  the  strangest 
knots  that  you  ever  saw.  There  is  a 
sign  quite  near  here  that  reads  * '  Cows 
milk  and  Retailed. ' ' 

Since  writing  you  last,  I  have  sent 

my  little   sick  girl  home.     It   almost 

broke  us  all  up,  but  she  could  n't  stay 

here    alone    during    the    summer    and 

164 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

there  was  nobody  to  take  care  of  her. 
I  write  to  her  every  week  and  try  to 
keep  her  cheered  up,  but  for  such  as 
she  there  is  only  one  release  and  that 
is  death. 

If  Jack's  hospital  ever  materializes, 
I  am  going  to  offer  my  services  as  a 
nurse.  This  poor  child's  plight  has 
taken  such  a  hold  upon  me  that  I  long 
to  do  something  for  all  the  sick  waifs 
in  creation. 


HIROSHIMA,  June,  1904. 

It  is  Sunday  afternoon,  and  your 
Foreign  Missionary  Kindergarten 
Teacher,  instead  of  trudging  off  to  Sun 
day  School  with  the  other  teachers, 
is  recklessly  sitting  in  dressing  gown 
and  slippers  with  her  golden  hair  hang 
ing  down  her  back,  writing  letters 
home.  After  teaching  all  week,  and 
165 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

listening  for  two  hours  to  a  Japanese 
sermon  Sunday  morning,  I  cross  my 
fingers  on  teaching  Sunday  School  in 
the  afternoon. 

This  past  week  I  have  been  trying 
to  practice  the  simple  life.  It  was  a 
good  time  for  we  had  spring  cleaning, 
five  guests,  daily  prayer-meetings,  two 
new  cooks,  and  an  earthquake.  I  think 
by  the  time  I  get  through,  I  '11  be  quali 
fied  to  run  a  government  on  some  small 
Pacific  Isle. 

The  whole  city  is  in  confusion,  ninety 
thousand  soldiers  are  here  now,  and 
eighty  thousand  more  are  expected  this 
week.  Every  house-holder  must  take 
as  many  as  he  can  accommodate,  and 
the  strain  on  the  people  is  heavy. 

We  heard  yesterday  of  the  terrible 

disaster  to  the  troops  that  left  here  on 

the  13th,  three  transports  were  sunk  by 

the   Russians.     Five   hundred  of  the 

166 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

wounded  from  'South  Hill  battle  have 
been  brought  here,  and  whenever  I  go 
out,  I  see  long  lines  of  stretchers  and 
covered  ambulances  bringing  in  more 
men.  It  is  intolerable  to  be  near  so 
much  suffering  and  not  to  be  able  to 
relieve  it.  We  are  all  so  worked  up 
with  pity  and  indignation,  and  sympa 
thy  that  we  hardly  dare  talk  about  the 
war. 

Summer  vacation  will  soon  be  here 
and  I  am  planning  a  wild  career  of 
self  indulgence.  I  am  going  to  Karui- 
zawa,  where  I  can  get  cooled  off  and 
rested  and  invite  my  soul  to  my  heart's 
content. 

For  two  mortal  weeks  the  rain  has 
poured  in  torrents.  The  rainy  season 
out  here  is  n't  any  of  your  nice  polite 
little  shower-a-day  affairs,  it  is  just 
one  interminable  downpour,  until  the 
old  earth  is  spanked  into  submission. 
167 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

I  can't  even  remember  how  sunshine 
looks,  and  my  spirits  are  mildewed  and 
my  courage  is  mouldy. 

To  add  to  the  discomfort,  we  are  be 
sieged  by  mosquitoes.  They  are  the 
big  ferocious  kind  that  carry  off  a  fin 
ger  at  a  time.  I  heard  of  one  mission 
ary  down  in  the  country,  who  was  so 
bothered  one  night  that  he  hung  his 
trousers  to  the  ceiling,  and  put  his 
head  in  one  leg,  and  made  his  wife  put 
her  head  in  the  other,  while  the  rest 
of  the  garment  served  as  a  breathing 
tube! 

It  has  been  nearly  a  year  since  I  was 
out  of  Hiroshima,  a  year  of  such  ups 
and  downs  that  I  feel  as  if  I  had  been 
digging  out  my  salvation  with  a  pick-ax. 

Not  that  I  do  not  enjoy  the  struggle; 
real  life  with  all  its  knocks  and  bumps, 
its  joys  and  sorrows,  is  vastly  prefer- 
168 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

able  to  a  passive  existence  of  indolence. 
Only  occasionally  I  look  forward  to 
the  time  when  I  shall  be  an  angel  friv- 
oling  in  the  eternal  blue!  Just  think 
of  being  reduced  to  a  nice  little  curly 
head  and  a  pair  of  wings !  That  's  the 
kind  of  angel  I  am  going  to  be.  "With 
no  legs  to  ache,  and  no  heart  to  break — 
but  dear  me  it  is  more  than  likely  that 
I  will  get  rheumatism  in  my  wings ! 

If  ever  I  do  get  to  heaven,  it  will  be 
on  your  ladder,  Mate.  You  have  coaxed 
me  up  with  confidence  and  praise,  you 
have  steadied  me  with  ethical  culture 
books,  and  essays,  and  sermons.  You 
have  gotten  me  so  far  up  (for  me), 
that  I  am  afraid  to  look  down.  I 
shrink  with  a  mighty  shrivel  when  I 
think  of  disappointing  you  in  any  way, 
and  I  expand  almost  to  bursting  when 
I  think  of  justifying  your  belief  in  me. 
169 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 


KARTJIZAWA,  July,  1904. 

Here  I  am  comfortably  established  in 
the  most  curious  sort  of  double-bar 
reled  house  you  ever  saw.  The  front 
part  is  all  Japanese  and  faces  on  one 
street,  and  the  back  part  is  foreign  and 
faces  on  another  street  a  square  away. 
The  two  are  connected  by  a  covered 
walk  which  passes  over  a  mill  race.  In 
the  floor  of  the  walk  just  over  the  wa 
ter  is  a  trap  door,  and  look  out  when 
I  will  I  can  see  the  Japanese  stopping 
to  take  a  bath  in  this  little  opening. 

I  have  a  nice  big  room  and  so  much 
service  thrown  in  that  it  embarrasses 
me.  When  I  come  in,  in  the  evening, 
three  little  maids  escort  me  to  my  room, 
one  fixes  the  mosquito  bar,  one  gets  my 
gown,  and  one  helps  to  undress  me. 
When  they  have  done  all  they  can 
170 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

think  of,  they  get  in  a  row,  all  bow 
together,  then  pitter  patter  away. 

The  clerk  has  to  make  out  the  menus 
and  as  his  English  is  limited,  he  calls 
upon  me  very  often  to  help  him.  Yes 
terday  he  came  with  only  one  entry 
and  that  was  * '  Corns  on  the  ear. ' '  In 
return  for  my  assistance  he  always  an 
nounces  my  bath,  and  escorts  me  to  the 
bath  room  carrying  my  sponge  and 
towels. 

As  to  Karuizawa,  it  has  a  summer 
population  of  about  four  hundred, 
three  hundred  and  ninety-nine  of  whom 
are  missionaries.  Let  us  all  unite  in 
singing  " Blest  be  the  tie  that  binds." 

Everybody  at  our  table  is  in  the 
mission  field.  A  long-nosed  young 
preacher  who  sits  opposite  me  looks  as 
if  he  had  spent  all  his  life  in  some  kind 
of  a  field.  He  has  a  terrible  attack  of 
religion;  I  never  saw  anybody  take  it 
171 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

• 

any  harder.  He  told  me  that  he  was 
engaged  to  be  married  and  for  three 
days  he  had  been  consulting  the  Lord 
about  what  kind  of  a  ring  he  should 
buy! 

Sunday  I  went  to  church  and  heard 
my  first  English  sermon  in  two  years. 
We  met  in  a  rough  little  shanty,  built 
in  a  cluster  of  pines,  and  almost  every 
nation  was  represented.  A  young  Eng 
lish  clergyman  read  the  service,  and 
afterward  said  a  few  words  about  sac 
rifice.  He  was  simple  and  sincere, 
and  his  deep  voice  trembled  with  earn 
estness  as  he  declared  that  sacrifice 
was  the  only  true  road  to  happiness, 
sacrifice  of  ourselves,  our  wishes  and 
desires,  for  the  good  and  the  progress 
of  others.  And  suddenly  all  the  feel 
ing  in  me  got  on  a  rampage  and  I 
wanted  to  get  up  and  say  that  it  was 
true,  that  I  knew  it  was  true,  that  the 
most  miserable,  pitiful,  smashed-up 
172 


The  Lady  of  the   Decoration 

life,  could  blossom  again  if  it  would 
only  blossom  for  others.  I  walked 
home  in  a  sort  of  ecstasy  and  at  din 
ner  the  long-nosed  young  preacher 
said :  *  "T  was  a  pity  we  could  n  't  have 
regular  preaching,  there  was  such  a 
peart  lot  at  meeting."  This  is  cer 
tainly  a  good  place  to  study  people's 
eccentricities,  their  foibles  and  follies, 
to  hear  them  preach  and  see  them  not 
practice ! 

One  more  year  and  I  will  be  home. 
Something  almost  stops  in  my  heart  as 
I  write  it!  Of  course  I  am  glad  you 
are  going  abroad  in  the  spring,  you 
have  been  living  on  the  prospect  of  see 
ing  Italy  all  your  life.  Only,  Mate, 
I  am  selfish  enough  to  want  you  back 
by  the  time  I  get  home.  It  would  take 
just  one  perfect  hour  of  seeing  you 
all  together  once  more  to  banish  the 
loneliness  of  all  these  years  ! 

I  am  glad  Jack  and  Dr.  Leet  have 
173 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

struck  up  such  a  friendship.  Jack 
uses  about  the  same  care  in  selecting 
a  friend  that  most  men  do  in  selecting 
a  wife.  Tell  Dr.  Leet  that  I  am  glad 
he  found  me  in  a  pigeon  hole  of  his 
memory,  but  that  I  am  a  long  way 
from  being  "the  blue-eyed  bunch  of 
mischief"  he  describes.  I  wish  you 
would  tell  him  that  I  am  slender,, 
pale,  and  pensive  with  a  glamour  of 
romance  and  mystery  hovering  about 
me ;  that  is  the  way  I  would  like  to  be. 

I  knew  you  could  get  Jack  out  of  his 
rut  if  you  tried.  The  Browning  even 
ings  must  be  highly  diverting,  I  can 
imagine  you  reading  a  few  lines  for 
him  to  expound,  then  him  reading  a 
few  for  you  to  explain,  then  both  gaz 
ing  into  space  with  "the  infinite  cry 
of  finite  hearts  that  yearn ! ' ' 

Dear  loyal  old  Jack !  How  memories 
stab  me  as  I  think  of  him.  It  seems 
174 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

impossible  to  think  of  him  as  other 
than  well  and  strong  and  self  reliant. 
What  happy,  happy  days  I  have 
spent  with  him!  They  seem  to  stand 
out  to-night  in  one  great  white  spot 
of  cheerfulness.  When  the  days  were 
the  darkest  and  I  could  n't  see  one  inch 
ahead,  Jack  would  happen  along  with 
a  funny  story  or  a  joke,  would  pretend 
not  to  see  what  was  going  on,  but 
do  some  little  kindness  that  would 
brighten  the  way  a  bit.  What  a  mix 
ture  he  is  of  tenderness,  and  brusque- 
ness,  of  common  sense  and  poetry,  of 
fun  and  seriousness!  I  think  you  and 
I  are  the  only  ones  in  the  world  who 
quite  understand  his  heights  and 
depths.  He  says  even  I  don't. 

KAKUIZAWA,  July,  1904. 

Since  writing  you  I  have  had  the 
175 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

pleasure  of  looking  six  hundred  feet 
down  the  throat  of  Asamayama,  the 
great  volcano.  If  the  old  lady  had  been 
impolite  enough  to  stick  out  her  tongue, 
I  would  at  present  be  a  cinder. 

We  started  at  seven  in  the  evening 
on  horseback.  Now  as  you  know  I 
have  ridden  pretty  much  everything 
from  a  broom  stick  to  a  camel,  but  for 
absolute  novelty  of  motion  commend 
me  to  a  Japanese  horse.  There  is  a 
lurch  to  larboard,  then  a  lurch  to  star 
board,  with  a  sort  of  ' '  shiver-my-tim- 
bers"  interlude.  A  coolie  walks  at  the 
head  of  each  horse,  and  reasons  softly 
with  him  when  he  misbehaves.  "We 
rode  for  thirteen  miles  to  the  foot  of 
the  volcano,  then  at  one  o  'clock  we  left 
the  horses  with  one  of  the  men  and  be 
gan  to  climb.  Each  climber  was  tied 
to  a  coolie  whose  duty  it  was  to  pull, 
and  to  carry  the  lantern.  We  made  a 
176 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

weird  procession,  and  the  strange  call 
of  the  coolies  as  they  bent  their  bodies 
to  the  task,  mingled  with  the  laughter 
and  exclamations  of  the  party. 

For  some  miles  the  pine  trees  and 
undergrowth  covered  the  mountain, 
then  came  a  stretch  of  utter  barren 
ness  and  isolation.  Miles  above  yet 
seemingly  close  enough  to  touch  rose 
tongues  of  flame  and  crimson  smoke. 
Above  was  the  majestic  serenity  of  the 
summer  night,  below  the  peaceful  val 
ley,  with  the  twinkling  lights  of  far 
away  villages.  It  was  a  queer  sensa 
tion  to  be  hanging  thus  between  earth 
and  sky,  and  to  feel  that  the  only  thing 
between  me  and  death  was  a  small  Jap 
anese  coolie,  who  was  half  dragging  me 
up  a  mountain  side  that  was  so  straight 
it  was  sway-back! 

When  at  last  we  reached  the  top, 
daylight  was  showing  faintly  in  the 
12  177 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

east.  Slowly  and  with  a  glory  unspeak 
able  the  sun  rose.  The  great  flames 
and  crimson  smoke,  which  at  night  had 
appeared  so  dazzling,  sank  into  insig 
nificance.  If  anyone  has  the  temerity 
to  doubt  the  existence  of  a  gracious, 
mighty  God,  let  him  stand  at  sunrise 
on  the  top  of  Asamayama  and  behold 
the  wonder  of  His  works! 

I  hardly  dared  to  breathe  for  fear 
I  would  dispel  the  illusion,  but  a  hearty 
lunch  eaten  with  the  edge  of  the  crater 
for  a  table  made  things  seem  pretty 
real.  The  coming  down  was  fearful 
for  the  ashes  were  very  deep,  and  we 
often  went  in  up  to  our  knees. 

The  next  morning  at  eleven,  I  rolled 
into  my  bed  more  dead  than  alive.  My 
face  and  hands  were  blistered  from  the 
heat  and  the  ashes,  and  I  was  sore  from 
head  to  foot,  but  I  had  a  vision  in  my 
soul  that  can  never  be  effaced. 
178 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 


HIEOSHIMA,  September,  1904. 

Well  here  I  ain  back  in  H.  (I  used 
to  think  it  stood  for  that  too  but  it 
does  n't!)  Curiously  enough  I  rather 
enjoy  getting  back  into  harness  this 
year.  Three  kindergartens  to  attend  in 
the  morning,  class  work  in  the  after 
noon,  four  separate  accounts  to  be 
kept,  besides  housekeeping,  mothers' 
meetings,  and  prayer  meetings,  would 
have  appalled  me  once. 

The  only  thing  that  phases  me  is  the 
company.  If  only  some  nice  accommo 
dating  cyclone  would  come  along  and 
gather  up  all  the  floating  population, 
and  deposit  it  in  a  neat  pile  in  some  dis 
tant  fence  corner,  I  would  be  everlast 
ingly  grateful.  One  loving  brother 
wrote  last  week  that  he  was  coming 
with  a  wife  and  three  children  to  board 
179 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

with  us  until  his  house  was  completed, 
and  that  he  knew  I  would  be  glad  to 
have  them.  Delighted  I  am  sure!  All 
I  need  to  complete  my  checkered  career 
is  to  keep  a  boarding-house!  I 
smacked  Susie  Damn  clear  down  the 
steps  and  sang  "A  consecrated  cross 
eyed  bear, ' '  then  I  wrote  him  to  come, 
It  is  against  the  principles  of  the  school 
to  refuse  anyone  its  hospitality,  con 
sequently  everybody  who  is  out  of  a 
job  comes  to  see  us. 

The  waves  of  my  wrath  break  upon 
Miss  Lessing  for  allowing  herself  to 
be  imposed  upon,  but  she  is  as  calm 
and  serene  as  the  Great  Buddha  of 
Kamakura. 

My  special  grievance  this  morning  is 
cooked  tomatoes  and  baby  organs. 
Our  cook  has  just  discovered  cooked 
tomatoes,  and  they  seem  to  fill  some 
longfelt  want  in  his  soul.  In  spite  of 
180 


The  Lady  of  the   Decoration 

protest,  he  serves  them  to  us  for  break 
fast,  tiffin  and  dinner,  and  the  house 
hold  sits  with  injured  countenance,  and 
silently  holds  me  responsible.  As  for 
the  nine  and  one  wind  bags  that  begin 
their  wheezing  and  squeaking  before 
breakfast,  my  thoughts  are  unfit  for 
publication!  This  morning  I  was 
awakened  by  the  strains  "  Shall  we 
meet  beyond  the  River?  "  Well  if  we 
do,  the  keys  will  fly  that  's  all  there  is 
about  it!  Once  in  a  while  they  side 
track  it  to  "  Oh!  to  be  nothing,  noth 
ing!"  That  is  where  I  fully  agree 
and  if  they  would  only  give  me  a  chance 
I  would  grant  their  desire  in  less  time 
than  it  takes  to  write  it.  I  am  sure  my 
Hades  will  be  a  hard  seat  in  a  lonesome 
corner  where  I  must  listen  to  baby  or 
gans  all  day  and  live  on  a  perpetual 
diet  of  cooked  tomatoes. 

To-day    they    are    bringing    in    the 
181 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

wounded  soldiers  from  Liaoyang,  and 
I  try  to  keep  away  from  the  windows 
so  I  will  not  see  them.  Those  bright 
strong  boys  that  left  here  such  a  little 
while  ago,  are  coming  back  on  stretch 
ers,  crippled  and  disfigured  for  life. 
Yesterday  while  taking  a  walk,  I 
saw  about  two  hundred  men,  right  off 
the  transport,  waiting  for  the  doctors 
and  nurses  to  come.  Men  whose 
clothes  had  not  been  changed  for 
weeks,  ragged,  bloody  and  soiled  be 
yond  conception.  Wounded,  tired.  sick, 
with  almost  every  trace  of  the  human 
gone  out  of  their  faces,  they  sat  or  lay 
on  the  ground  waiting  to  be  cared  for, 
Most  of  the  wounds  had  not  been 
touched  since  they  were  hastily  tied  up 
on  the  battlefield.  I  thought  I  had  some 
idea  of  what  war  meant,  but  I  had  n't 
the  faintest  conception  of  the  real  hor 
ror  of  it. 

182 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

Miss  Lessing  is  trying  to  get  permis 
sion  for  us  to  do  regular  visiting  at 
the  hospitals,  but  the  officials  are  very 
cautious  about  allowing  any  foreigner 
behind  the  scenes. 

Just  here  I  hung  my  head  out  of  the 
window  to  ask  the  cook  what  time  it 
was.  He  called  back,  "Me  no  know! 
clock  him  gone  to  sleep.  He  no  talk 
some  more." 

I  think  I  shall  follow  the  example 
of  the  clock. 

HIROSHIMA,  October,  1904. 

Dearest  Mate: 

I  have  been  to  the  hospital  at  last  and 
I  can  think  of  nothing,  see  nothing,  and 
talk  of  nothing  but  those  poor  battered 
up  men.  Yesterday  the  authorities  sent 
word  that  if  the  foreign  teachers  would 
come  and  make  a  little  music  for  the 
183 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

sick  men  it  would  be  appreciated.  We 
had  no  musical  instrument  except  the 
organ,  so  Miss  Lessing  and  I  bundled 
one  up  on  a  jinrikisha  and  trudged 
along  beside  it  through  the  street.  I 
got  almost  hysterical  over  our  absurd 
appearance,  and  pretended  that  Miss 
Lessing  was  the  organ  grinder,  and  I 
the  monkey.  But  oh!  Mate  when  we 
got  to  the  hospital  all  the  silliness  was 
knocked  out  of  me.  Thousands  of 
mutilated  and  dying  men,  literally  shot 
to  pieces  by  the  Russian  bullets.  I 
can 't  talk  about  it !  It  was  too  horrible 
to  describe. 

We  wheeled  the  organ  into  one  of  the 
wards  and  two  of  the  teachers  sang 
while  I  played.  It  was  pitiful  to  see 
how  eager  the  men  were  to  hear.  The 
room  was  so  big  that  those  in  the  back 
begged  to  be  moved  closer,  so  the  little 
nurses  carried  the  convalescent  ones 
forward  on  their  backs. 
184 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

For  one  hour  I  pumped  away  on 
that  wheezy  little  old  instrument,  with 
the  tears  running  down  my  cheeks 
most  of  the  time.  So  long  as  I  live 
I  '11  never  make  fun  of  a  baby  organ 
again.  The  joy  that  one  gave  that  af 
ternoon  justified  its  being. 

And  then— prepare  for  the  worst, — 
we  distributed  tracts.  Oh!  yes  I  did 
it  too,  in  spite  of  all  the  fun  I  have 
made,  and  would  you  believe  it?  those 
men  who  were  able  to  walk,  crowded 
around  and  begged  for  them,  and  the 
others  in  the  beds  held  out  their  hands 
or  followed  us  wistfully  with  their 
eyes.  They  were  so  crazy  for  some 
thing  to  read  that  they  were  even  will 
ing  to  read  about  the  foreign  God. 

It  was  late  when  we  got  back  and  I 
went  straight  to  bed  and  indulged  in 
a  chill.  All  the  horror  of  war  had 
come  home  to  me  for  the  first  time,  and 
my  very  soul  rebelled  against  it.  They 
185 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

say  you  get  hardened  to  the  sights  af 
ter  a  few  visits  to  the  hospital,  but  I 
hope  I  shall  never  get  to  the  point  of 
believing  that  it 's  right  for  strong 
useful  men  to  be  killed  or  crippled  for 
life  in  order  to  settle  a  controversy. 

Before  we  went  into  the  wards  the 
physician  in  charge  took  us  all  over 
the  buildings,  showed  us  where  the  old 
bandages  were  being  washed  and 
cleaned,  where  the  instruments  were 
sharpened  and  repaired,  where  the 
stretchers  and  crutches,  and  "first  aid 
to  the  injured ' '  satchels  were  kept.  We 
were  taken  through  the  postoffice, 
where  all  the  mail  comes  and  goes 
from  the  front.  It  was  touching  to  see 
the  number  of  letters  that  had  been 
sent  home  unopened. 

Twenty  thousand  sick  soldiers  are 
cared  for  in  Hiroshima,  and  such  sys 
tem,  snch  cleanliness  and  order  you 
186 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

have  never  seen.  I  have  wished  for 
Jack  a  thousand  times ;  it  would  delight 
his  soul  to  see  the  skill  and  ability  of 
these  wonderful  little  doctors  and 
nurses. 


HIROSHIMA,  November,  1904. 

To-morrow  it  will  be  four  weeks 
since  I  have  had  any  kind  of  mail  from 
America.  It  seems  to  me  that  every 
thing  has  stopped  running  across  the 
ocean,  even  the  waves. 

I  know  little  these  days  outside  of 
the  kindergarten  and  the  hospital.  The 
former  grows  cuter  and  dearer  all  the 
time.  It  is  a  constant  inspiration  to 
see  the  daily  development  of  these 
cunning  babies.  As  for  the  visits  to 
the  hospital,  they  are  a  self-appointed 
task  that  grows  no  easier  through  repe 
tition.  You  know  how  I  shrink  from 
187 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

seeing  pain,  and  how  all  my  life  I  have 
tried  to  get  away  from  the  disagree 
able?  Well  it  is  like  torture  to  go  day 
after  day  into  the  midst  of  the  most  ter 
rible  suffering.  But  in  view  of  the  big 
ger  things  of  life,  the  tremendous 
struggle  going  on  so  near,  the  agony  of 
the  sick  and  wounded,  the  suffering  of 
the  women  and  children,  my  own  little 
qualms  get  lost  in  the  shuffle,  and  my 
one  consuming  desire  is  to  help  in  any 
way  I  can. 

Last  week  we  took  in  addition  to  the 
"wind  bag"  two  big  baskets  of  flowers 
to  give  to  the  sickest  ones.  Oh!  If 
I  could  only  make  you  know  what  flow 
ers  mean  to  them!  Men  too  sick  to 
raise  their  heads  and  often  dying,  will 
stretch  out  their  hands  for  a  flower, 
and  be  perfectly  content  to  hold  it  in 
their  fingers.  One  soldier  with  both 
arms  gone  asked  me  for  a  flower  just 
188 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

as  I  had  emptied  my  basket.  I  would 
have  given  my  month >s  salary  for  one 
rose,  but  all  I  had  was  a  withered 
little  pansy.  He  motioned  for  me  to 
give  him  that  and  asked  me  to  put  it  in 
a  broken  bottle  hanging  on  the  wall, 
so  he  could  see  it. 

If  I  did  n  't  get  away  from  it  all  once 
in  a  while,  I  don 't  believe  I  could  stand 
it.  Yesterday  was  the  Emperor's 
birthday  and  we  had  a  holiday.  I  took 
several  of  the  girls  and  went  for  a  long 
ramble  in  the  country.  The  fields  were 
a  brilliant  yellow,  rich  and  heavy  with 
the  unharvested  grain.  The  mountains 
were  deeply  purple,  and  the  sky  so 
tenderly  blue,  that  the  whole  world 
just  seemed  a  place  to  be  glad  and 
happy  in.  Fall  in  Japan  does  not  sug 
gest  death  and  decay,  but  rather  the 
drifting  into  a  beautiful  rest,  where 
dreams  can  be  dreamed  and  the  world 
189 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

forgot.  Such  a  spirit  of  peace  envel 
oped  the  whole  scene,  that  it  was  hard 
to  realize  that  the  long  line  of  black 
objects  on  the  distant  road  were 
stretchers  bearing  the  sick  and 
wounded  from  the  transports  to  the 
hospitals. 


HIROSHIMA,  December,  1904. 

Last  Saturday  I  had  to  go  across 
the  bay  to  visit  one  of  our  branch  kin 
dergartens.  Many  Russian  prisoners 
are  stationed  on  the  island  and  I  was 
tremendously  interested  in  the  good 
time  they  were  having.  The  Japanese 
officials  are  entertaining  them  vio>- 
lently  with  concerts,  picnics,  etc.  Imag 
ine  a  lot  of  these  big  muscular  men 
being  sent  on  an  all-day  excursion  with 
two  little  Japanese  guards.  Of  course, 
it  is  practically  impossible  for  the  men 
190 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

to  escape  from  the  island  but  I  don't 
believe  they  want  to.  A  cook  has  ac 
tually  been  brought  from  Vladivostock 
so  that  they  may  have  Russian  food, 
and  the  best  things  in  the  markets  are 
sent  to  them.  The  prisoners  I  saw 
seemed  in  high  spirits,  and  were  hav 
ing  as  much  fun  as  a  lot  of  school  boys 
out  on  a  lark.  I  don't  wonder!  It  is 
lots  more  comfortable  being  a  prisoner 
in  Japan  than  a  soldier  in  Manchuria. 
I  only  had  a  few  minutes  to  visit  the 
hospital,  but  I  was  glad  I  went.  As 
the  doctor  took  me  through  one  of  the 
wards  where  the  sickest  men  lay,  I  saw 
one  big  rough  looking  Russian  with 
such  a  scowl  on  his  face  that  I  hardly 
dared  offer  him  my  small  posy.  But 
I  hated  to  pass  him  by  so  I  ventured 
to  lay  it  on  the  foot  of  the  cot.  What 
was  my  consternation  when,  after  one 
glance,  he  clasped  both  hands  over  his 
191 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

face  and  sobbed  like  a  sick  child.  "Are 
you  in  pain?"  asked  the  doctor. 
"No,"  he  said  shortly,  "I  'm  home 
sick."  Oh!  Mate,  that  finished  me! 
Did  n't  I  know  better  than  anybody  in 
the  world  how  he  felt !  I  just  sat  down 
on  the  side  of  the  cot  and  patted  him, 
and  tried  to  tell  him  how  sorry  I  was 
though  he  could  hardly  understand  a 
word. 

This  morning  I  could  have  done  a 
song  and  dance  when  I  heard  that  he 
had  been  operated  on  and  was  to  be 
sent  home. 

Almost  every  day  we  are  having 
grand  military  funerals,  and  they  are 
most  impressive  I  can  tell  you.  Yes 
terday  twenty-two  officers  were  buried 
at  the  same  time,  and  the  school  stood 
on  the  street  for  over  an  hour  to  do 
them  honor.  The  procession  was 
very  interesting,  with  the  Buddhist 
192 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

priests,  in  their  gorgeous  robes,  and 
the  mourners  in  white  or  light  blue. 
First  came  the  square  box  with  the 
cremated  remains,  then  the  officer's 
horse,  then  coolies  carrying  small  trees 
which  were  to  be  planted  on  the  grave. 
Next  came  a  large  picture  of  the  de 
ceased,  and  perhaps  his  coat  or  sword, 
next  the  shaven  priests  in  magnificent 
raiment  and  last  the  mourners  carry 
ing  small  trays  with  rice  cakes,  to  be 
placed  upon  the  grave.  The  wives 
and  mothers  and  daughters  rode  in 
jinrikishas,  hand  folded  meekly  in 
hand,  and  eyes  downcast.  Such  calm 
resigned  faces  I  have  never  seen,  many 
white  and  wasted  with  sorrow,  but  un 
der  absolute  control.  Of  the  entire 
number  only  one  gave  vent  to  her 
grief ;  a  bent  old  woman  with  thin  grey 
hair  cut  close  to  her  head,  rode  with 
both  hands  over  her  face.  She  had 
193 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

lost  two  sons  in  one  battle,  and  the  cry 
of  her  human  heart  was  stronger  than 
any  precept  of  her  religion. 


HIROSHIMA,  December,  1904. 

You  remember  the  Irishman's  saying 
that  we  could  be  pretty  comfortable  in 
life  if  it  was  n't  for  our  pleasures'? 
Well  I  could  get  along  rather  well  in 
Japan  were  it  not  for  the  Merry 
Christmases.  Such  a  terrible  longing 
seizes  me  for  my  loved  ones  and  for 
God's  country  that  I  feel  like  a  needle 
near  a  magnet.  But  next  Christmas ! 
I  just  go  right  up  in  the  air  when  I 
think  about  it. 

This  school  of  life  is  a  difficult  one 
at  best,  but  when  a  weak  sister  like 
myself  is  put  about  three  grades 
higher  than  she  belongs,  it  is  more 
than  hard.  I  don't  care  a  rap  for  the 
194 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

struggle  and  the  heart  aches,  if  I  have 
only  made  good.  When  I  came  out 
there  were  two  kindergartens,  now 
there  are  nine  besides  a  big  training 
class.  Anybody  else  could  have  done 
as  much  for  the  work  but  one  thing  is 
certain,  the  work  could  n't  have  done 
for  anyone  else  what  it  has  done  for 
me.  Outwardly  I  am  the  same  feather 
weight  as  of  old,  but  there  is  a  big 
change  inside,  Mate,  you  '11  have  to 
take  my  word  for  it.  I  am  coming  to 
take  the  slaps  of  Fate  very  much  as 
I  used  to  take  the  curling  of  my  hair 
with  a  hot  iron,  it  pulled  and  some 
times  burned,  but  I  did  n't  care  so  long 
as  it  was  going  to  improve  my  looks. 
So  now  I  use  my  crosses  as  sort  of 
curling  irons  for  my  character. 

Your  sudden  decision  to  give  up  your 
trip    to    Europe    this    spring    set   me 
guessing!     I  can't  imagine,  after  all 
195 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

your  planning  and  your  dreams,  what 
could  have  changed  your  mind  so  com 
pletely.  You  don't  seem  to  care  a  rap 
about  going.  Now  look  here,  Mate,  I 
want  a  full  report.  You  have  turned 
all  the  pockets  of  my  confidence  inside 
out.  What  about  yours?  Have  you 
been  getting  an  "aim"  in  life,  are  you 
going  to  be  an  operatic  singer,  or  a 
temperance  lecturer,  or  anything  like 
that  ?  You  are  so  horribly  high  minded 
that  I  am  prepared  for  the  worst. 

I  wish  it  would  stop  raining.  The 
mountains  are  hid  by  a  heavy  gray 
mist,  and  the  drip,  drip  of  the  rain 
from  roof  and  trees  is  not  a  cheering 
sound.  I  am  doing  my  best  to  keep 
things  bright  within,  I  have  built  a  big 
fire  in  my  grate,  and  in  my  heart  I 
have  lighted  all  the  lamps  at  my  little 
shrines,  and  I  am  burning  incense  to 
the  loves  that  were  and  are. 
196 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

Just  after  tiffin  the  rain  stopped  for 
a  little  while  and  I  rushed  out  for  a 
walk.  I  had  been  reading  the  *  *  Christ 
mas  Carol"  all  morning,  and  it  brought 
so  many  memories  of  home  that  I  was 
feeling  rather  wobbly.  My  walk  set 
me  up  immensely.  A  baldheaded, 
toothless  old  man  stopped  me  and 
asked  me  where  I  was  ''coming." 
When  I  told  him  he  said  that  was  won 
derful  and  he  hoped  I  would  have  a 
good  time.  A  woman  with  a  child  on 
her  back  ran  out  and  stopped  me  to 
ask  if  I  would  please  let  the  baby  see 
my  hair.  Half  a  dozen  children  and 
two  dogs  followed  me  all  the  way,  and 
an  old  man  and  woman  leaned  against 
a  wall  and  laughed  aloud  because  a 
foreigner  was  so  funny  to  look  at. 

If  anyone  thinks  that  he  can  indulge 
in  a  nice  private  case  of  the  blues 
while  taking  a  walk  in  Japan,  he  de- 
197 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

ceives  himself.  I  started  out  feeling 
like  Napoleon  at  St.  Helena,  and  I 
came  home  cheerful  and  ravenously 
hungry. 

I  have  been  trying  to  read  poetry 
this  winter,  but  I  don't  make  much 
progress.  The  truth  is  I  have  gained 
five  pounds,  and  I  am  afraid  I  am  get 
ting  too  fat.  I  never  knew  but  one  fat 
person  to  appreciate  poetry  and  he 
crocheted  tidies. 

By  the  way  I  have  learned  to  knit ! ! 
You  see  there  are  so  many  times  when 
I  have  to  play  the  gracious  hostess 
when  I  feel  like  a  volcano  within,  that 
I  decided  to  get  something  on  which 
I  could  vent  my  restlessness.  It  is  as 
tonishing  how  much  bad  temper  one 
can  knit  into  a  garment.  I  don't  know 
yet  what  mine  is  going  to  be,  probably 
an  opera  bonnet  for  Susie  Damn. 
198 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 


KYOTO,  December,  1904. 

You  are  not  any  more  surprised  to 
hear  from  me  in  Kyoto  than  I  am  to 
be  here.  One  of  the  teachers  here,  a 
great  big-hearted  splendid  woman, 
knowing  that  I  was  interested  in  the 
sick  soldiers,  asked  me  to  come  up  for 
a  week  and  help  the  Eed  Cross  nurses. 
For  six  days  we  have  met  all  the 
trains,  and  given  hot  tea,  and  books 
to  both  the  men  who  were  going  to 
the  front  and  to  those  who  were  being 
brought  home.  We  work  side  by  side 
with  Buddhist  priests,  ladies  of  rank, 
and  coolies,  serving  from  one  to  four 
hundred  men  in  fifteen  minutes!  You 
never  saw  such  a  scrimmage,  every 
body  works  like  mad  while  the  train 
stops,  and  the  wild  "Banzais"  that 
199 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

greet  us  as  the  men  catch  sight  of  the 
hot  tea,  show  us  how  welcome  it  is. 

But  the  sights,  Mate  dear,  are  enough 
to  break  one's  heart.  I  have  seen 
good-byes,  and  partings  until  I 
have  n't  an  emotion  left!  One  man 
I  talked  with  was  going  back  for  the 
fourth  time  having  been  wounded  and 
sent  home  again  and  again;  his  wife 
never  took  her  eyes  from  his  face  un 
til  the  train  pulled  out,  and  the  smile 
with  which  she  sent  him  away  was  more 
heart  rending  than  any  tears  I  ever 
saw. 

Then  I  have  been  touched  by  an  old 
man  and  his  wife  who  for  four  days 
have  met  every  train  to  tell  their  only 
son  good-bye.  They  are  so  feeble  that 
they  have  to  be  helped  up  and  down 
the  steps  and  as  each  train  comes  and 
goes  and  their  boy  is  not  on  board, 
they  totter  hand  in  hand  back  to  the 
200 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

street  corner  to  wait  more  long  hours, 
Going  one  way  the  trains  carry  the 
soldiers  to  the  front,  boys  for  the  most 
part  wild  with  enthusiasm,  high  spir 
its,  and  courage,  and  coming  the  other 
way  in  vastly  greater  numbers  are  the 
silent  trains  bearing  the  sick  and 
wounded  and  dead. 

We  meet  five  trains  during  the  day 
and  one  at  two  in  the  night.  I  have 
gotten  so  that  I  can  sleep  sitting 
upright  on  a  hard  bench  between 
trains.  Think  of  the  plucky  little  Jap 
anese  women  who  have  done  this  ever 
since  the  beginning  of  the  war ! 

Out  of  my  experience  at  the  station 
came  another  very  charming  one  yes 
terday.  It  seems  that  the  president  of 
the  Red  Cross  Society  is  a  royal  prin 
cess,  first  cousin  indeed  to  the  Emperor. 
She  had  heard  of  me  through  her  secre 
tary  and  of  the  small  services  I  had 
201 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

rendered  here  and  at  Hiroshima,  so 
she  requested  an  interview  that  she 
might  thank  me  in  person. 

It  seemed  very  ridiculous  that  I 
should  receive  formal  recognition  for 
pouring  tea  and  handing  out  posies,  but 
I  was  crazy  to  see  the  Princess,  so 
early  yesterday  morning,  I  donned  my 
best  raiment  and  sallied  forth  with  an 
interpreter. 

The  house  was  a  regular  Chinese 
puzzle  and  I  was  passed  on  from  one 
person  to  another  until  I  got  positively 
dizzy.  At  last  we  came  to  a  long  beau 
tiful  room,  at  the  end  of  which,  in  a 
robe  of  purple  and  gold,  all  covered 
with  white  chrysanthemums,  sat  the 
royal  lady.  I  was  preparing  to  make 
my  lowest  bow,  when,  to  my  astonish 
ment,  she  came  forward  with  extended 
hand  and  spoke  to  me  in  English! 
Then  she  bowled  me  right  over  in  the 
first  round  by  asking  me  about  Kinder- 
202 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

garten.  I  forgot  that  she  was  a  lady 
of  royalty  and  numerous  decorations, 
and  that  etiquette  forbade  me  speak 
ing  except  when  spoken  to.  She  was 
so  responsive  and  so  interested,  that  I 
found  myself  talking  in  a  blue  streak. 
Then  she  told  me  a  bit  of  her  story, 
and  I  longed  to  hear  more.  It  seems 
that  certain  women  of  the  royal  line 
are  not  permitted  to  marry,  and  she, 
being  restless  and  ambitious,  became  a 
Buddhist  Priestess,  having  her  own 
temple,  priestesses,  etc.  The  priest 
esses  are  all  young  girls,  and  I  wish 
you  could  have  seen  them  examining 
my  clothes,  my  hair  and  my  rings.  The 
Princess  herself  is  a  woman  of  bril 
liant  attainments,  and  fine  executive 
ability. 

Of  course  we  had  tea,  and  sat  on  the 
floor  and  chattered  and  laughed  like  a 
lot  of  school  girls.    When  I  left  I  was 
203 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

told  that  the  Princess  desired  my  pho 
tograph  at  once,  and  that  I  should  sit 
for  it  the  next  day.  I  suppose  I  am  in 
for  it. 


HIROSHIMA,  December,  1904. 

My  dearest  Mate: 

The  American  mail  is  in  and  the  se 
cret  is  out,  or  at  least  half-way  out 
and  I  am  wild  with  curiosity  and  in 
terest.  You  say  you  can't  give  me  any 
of  the  particulars  and  you  would  rather 
I  would  n't  even  guess.  All  that  you 
want  me  to  know  is  that  you  have  "a 
new  interest  in  life  that  is  the  deepest 
and  most  beautiful  experience  you  have 
ever  known."  I  will  do  as  you  re 
quest,  not  ask  any  questions,  or  make 
any  surmises  but  you  will  let  me  say 
this,  that  no  fame,  no  glory,  no  wealth 
can  ever  give  one  thousandth  part  of 
204 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

the  real  heart's  content  that  one  hour 
of  love  can  give.  Without  it  work  of 
any  kind  is  against  the  full  tide,  and 
accomplishment  is  emptier  than  vanity. 
The  heart  still  cries  out  for  its  own, 
for  what  is  its  birthright  and  heritage. 

I  am  glad  with  all  my  soul  for  your 
happiness,  Mate,  the  tenderest  bless 
ing  that  lips  could  frame  would  not  ex 
press  half  that  is  in  my  heart.  There 
is  nothing  so  sure  in  life  as  that  love 
is  best  of  all.  You  think  you  know  it 
after  a  few  weeks  of  loving,  I  know 
I  know  after  years  of  grief  and  suffer 
ing  and  despair. 

From  the  time  when  you  used  to 
stand  between  me  and  childish  punish 
ments,  through  all  the  happy  days  of 
girlhood,  the  sorrowful  days  of  woman 
hood,  on  up  to  the  bitter-sweet  present, 
you  have  never  failed  me. 

I  want  to  give  you  a  whole  heart  full 
205 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

of  gladness  and  rejoicing,  I  want  to 
crowd  out  my  own  little  wail  of  be 
reavement,  but  Oh!  Mate,  I  never  felt 
so  alone  in  my  life  before!  I  am  not 
asking  you  to  tell  me  who  the  man  is. 
I  am  trying  not  to  guess.  Tell  me 
what  you  like  and  when  you  like,  and 
rest  assured  that  whatever  comes,  my 
heart  is  with  you— and  with  him. 


HIROSHIMA,  January,  1905. 

It  has  been  longer  than  usual  since 
I  wrote  but  somehow  things  have  been 
going  wrong  with  me  of  late  and  I 
did  n't  want  to  bother  you.  But  oh! 
Mate,  I  have  n't  anybody  else  in  the 
world  to  come  to,  and  you  '11  have  to 
forgive  me  for  bringing  a  cloud  across 
your  happiness. 

The  whole  truth  is  I  'rn  worsted! 
The  fight  has  been  too  much.  Days, 
206 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

weeks,  months  of  homesickness  have 
piled  up  on  top  of  me  until  all  my  cour 
age  and  my  control,  all  my  will  seem 
paralysed. 

Night  after  night  I  lie  awake  and 
stare  out  into  the  dark,  and  staring 
back  at  me  is  the  one  word  "alone", 
In  the  daytime,  I  try  to  keep  somebody 
with  me  all  the  time,  I  have  gotten 
afraid  of  myself.  My  face  in  the  mir 
ror  does  not  seem  to  belong  to  me,  it 
is  a  curious  unfamiliar  face  that  I  do 
not  know.  Every  once  in  a  while  I 
want  to  beat  the  air  and  scream,  but 
I  don't  do  it.  I  clench  my  fists  and 
set  my  teeth  and  teach,  teach,  teach. 

But  I  can't  go  on  like  this  forever! 
Flesh  and  spirit  rebel  against  a  life 
time  of  it!  Have  n't  I  paid  my  pen 
alty?  Are  n't  the  lightness  and  bright 
ness  and  beauty  ever  coming  back? 

On  my  desk  is  a  contract  waiting  to 
207 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

be  signed  for  another  four  years  at  the 
school.  Beside  it  is  a  letter  from  Bro 
ther,  begging  me  to  drop  everything 
and  come  home  at  once.  Can  you 
guess  what  the  temptation  is?  On  the 
one  hand  ceaseless  work,  uncongenial 
surroundings  and  exile,  on  the  other 
luxury,  loved  ones, — and  dependence. 
I  must  give  my  answer  to-morrow  and 
Heaven  only  knows  what  it  will  be. 
One  thing  is  certain  I  am  tired  of  do 
ing  hard  things,  I  am  tired  of  being 
brave. 

It  is  storming  fearfully  but  I  am 
going  out  to  mail  this  letter.  If  I  cable 
that  I  am  coming  you  must  be  the  first 
one  to  know  why.  I  have  tried  to  grow 
into  something  higher  and  better,  God 
knows  I  have,  but  I  am  afraid  I  am 
a  house  built  on  the  sands  after  all. 
Don't  be  hard  on  me,  Mate,  whatever 
comes  remember  I  have  tried. 
208 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 


HIROSHIMA,  3  hours  later. 

If  you  open  this  letter  first,  don't 
read  the  one  that  comes  in  the  same 
mail.  I  wrote  it  this  afternoon,  and  I 
would  give  everything  I  possess  to  get 
it  back  again.  When  I  went  out  to 
mail  it,  I  was  feeling  so  utterly  des 
perate  that  I  did  n't  care  a  rap  for 
the  storm  or  anything  else.  I  went  on 
and  on  until  I  came  to  the  sea-wall 
that  makes  a  big  curve  out  into  the  sea. 
When  I  had  gone  as  far  as  I  dared,. 
I  climbed  up  on  an  old  stone  lantern, 
and  let  the  spray  and  the  rain  beat  on 
my  face.  The  wind  was  whipping  the 
waves  into  a  perfect  fury,  and  pound 
ing  them  against  the  wall  at  my  feet. 
The  thunder  rolled  and  roared,  and 
great  flashes  of  lightning  ripped  gashes 
in  the  green  and  purple  water.  It  was 

34  209 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

the  most  glorious  sight  I  ever  saw  5  I 
felt  that  the  wind,  the  waves,  and  the 
storm  were  all  my  friends  and  that 
they  were  doing  all  my  beating  and 
screaming  for  me. 

I  clung  to  the  lantern,  with  my 
clothes  dripping  and  my  hair  stream 
ing  about  my  face  until  the  storm  was 
over.  And  I  don't  think  I  was  ever 
so  near  to  God  in  my  life  as  when  the 
sun  came  out  suddenly  from  the  clouds 
and  lit  up  that  tempest-tossed  sea  into 
a  perfect  glory  of  light  and  color !  And 
the  peace  had  come  into  my  heart, 
Mate,  and  I  knew  that  I  was  going 
to  take  up  my  cross  again  and  bear  it 
bravely.  I  was  so  glad,  so  thankful 
that  I  could  scarcely  keep  my  feet  on 
the  ground.  I  struck  out  at  full  speed 
along  the  sea  wall  and  ran  every  step 
of  the  way  home. 

And  now  after  a  hot  bath  and  dry 
210 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

clothes,  with  my  little  kettle  singing 
by  my  side,  I  want  to  tell  you  that  I 
have  decided  to  stay,  perhaps  for  five 
months,  perhaps  for  five  years. 

Out  of  the  wreckage  of  my  old  life 
I  Ve  managed  to  build  a  fairly  respect 
able  craft.  It  has  taken  me  just  four 
years  to  realize  that  it  is  not  a  pleas 
ure  boat.  To-night  I  realize  once  for 
all  that  it  is  a  very  modest  little  tug, 
and  wherever  it  can  tow  anything  or 
anybody  into  harbor  there  it  belongs, 
and  there  it  stays. 

Tell  them  all  that  I  am  quite  well 
again,  Mate,  and  as  for  you,  please 
don't  even  bother  your  blessed  head 
about  ine  again.  I  have  meekly  taken 
my  place  in  the  middle  of  the  sea-saw 
and  I  shall  probably  never  go  very 
high  or  very  low  again.  I  am  sleepy 
for  the  first  time  in  two  weeks,  so  good 
bye  comrade  mine  and  God  bless  you. 
211 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

HIROSHIMA,  February,  1905. 

My  dearest  Mate: 

I  can't  feel  quite  right  until  I  tell 
you  that  I  have  guessed  your  secret, 
that  I  have  known  from  the  first  it  was 
Jack.  I  always  knew  you  were  made 
for  each  other,  both  so  splendid  and 
noble  and  true.  It  is  n't  any  partic 
ular  credit  to  you  two  that  you  are 
good,  there  was  no  alternative — you 
could  n't  be  bad. 

How  perfectly  you  will  fit  into  all  his 
plans  and  ambitions !  A  beautiful  new 
life  is  opening  up  for  you,  a  life  so 
full  of  promise,  of  tremendous  possi 
bilities  for  good  not  only  for  you  but 
for  others  that  it  seems  like  a  bit  of 
heaven. 

Tell  him  how  I  feel,  Mate.  It  is 
212 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

hard  for  me  to  write  letters  these  days, 
but  I  want  him  to  know  that  I  am  glad 
because  he  is  happy. 

I  have  been  living  in  the  past  to-day 
going  over  the  old  days  in  the  Moun 
tains  up  at  the  lake,  and  the  reunions 
on  the  farm.  How  many  have  gone 
down  into  the  great  silence  since  then! 
Somehow  I  seem  nearer  to  them  than 
I  do  to  you  who  are  alive.  While  I 
am  still  on  the  crowded  highway  of 
life,  yet  I  am  surrounded  by  strange, 
unloving  faces  that  have  no  connection 
with  the  joys  or  the  sorrows  of  the 
past. 

How  the  view  changes  as  we  pass 
along  the  great  road.  At  first  only  the 
hilltops  are  visible,  rosy  and  radiant 
under  the  enthusiasm  of  youth,  then 
the  level  plains  come  into  sight  flooded 
with  the  bright  light  of  mid-day,  then 
slowly  we  slip  into  the  valleys  where 
213 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

the  long  shadows  fall  like  memories 
across  our  hearts. 

Oh!  well,  with  all  the  struggles,  all 
the  heartaches,  I  am  glad,  Mate,  very 
glad  that  I  have  lived — and  laughed. 
For  I  am  laughing  again,  in  spite  of 
the  fact  that  my  courage  got  fuddled 
and  took  the  wrong  road. 

I  heard  of  a  man  the  other  day  who 
had  received  a  sentence  of  fifteen 
years  for  some  criminal  act.  He  was 
in  love  with  the  freedom  of  life,  he 
was*  young  and  strong,  so  he  made 
a  dash  down  a  long  iron  staircase, 
dropped  into  a  river,  swam  a  mile  and 
gained  his  freedom.  All  search  failed 
to  find  him,  but  two  days  later  he 
walked  into  the  police  station  and  gave 
himself  up  to  serve  his  time.  I  made 
my  dash  for  liberty,  but  I  have  come 
back  to  serve  my  time. 

I  don't  have  to  tell  you,  Mate,  that 
214 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

I  am  ashamed  of  having  shown  the 
white  feather.  You  will  write  me  a 
beautiful  letter  and  explain  it  all  away, 
but  I  know  in  my  soul  you  are  disap 
pointed  in  me,  and  to  even  think  about 
it  is  like  going  down  in  a'  swift  ele 
vator.  Being  able  to  go  under  grace 
fully  is  my  highest  ambition  at  present, 
but  try  as  I  will,  I  kick  a  few  kicks 
before  I  disappear. 

Please,  please,  Mate,  don't  worry 
about  me.  I  promise  that  if  I  reach 
the  real  limit  I  will  cable  for  a  special 
steamer  to  be  sent  for  me.  But  I 
don't  intend  to  reach  it,  or  at  least  I 
am  going  to  get  on  the  other  side  of  it, 
so  there  will  be  no  further  danger. 

Two  long  months  will  pass  before  I 
get  an  answer  to  this.  It  will  come 
in  April  with  the  cherry  blossoms  and 
the  spring. 

215 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 


HIKOSHIMA,  March,  1905. 

You  must  forgive  me  if  the  letters 
have  been  few  and  far  between  lately. 
After  my  little  ''wobble"  I  plunged 
into  work  with  might  and  main,  and 
I  am  still  at  it  for  all  I  am  worth. 
First  I  house-cleaned,  and  the  old  place 
must  certainly  be  surprised  at  its 
transformation.  Fresh  curtains,  new 
paper,  cozy  window  seats,  and  bright 
cushions  have  made  a  vast  difference. 
Then  I  tackled  the  kindergarten,  and 
the  result  is  about  the  prettiest  thing 
in  Japan.  The  room  is  painted  white 
with  buff  walls  and  soft  muslin  cur 
tains,  the  only  decoration  being  a  hun 
dred  blessed  babies,  in  gay  little  ki- 
monas,  who  look  like  big  bunches  of 
flowers  placed  in  a  wreath  upon  the 
floor. 

216 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

As  for  my  training  class,  I  have  no 
words  to  express  my  gratification.  I 
can  scarcely  believe  that  the  fine,  cap 
able,  earnest  young  women  that  are 
going  out  to  all  parts  of  Japan  to  start 
new  Kindergartens,  are  the  timid, 
giggling,  dependent  little  creatures  that 
came  to  me  four  years  ago. 

Goodness  knows  I  was  as  immature 
in  my  way  as  they  were  in  theirs,  but 
in  my  desperate  need,  I  builded  better 
than  I  knew.  I  recklessly  followed 
your  advice  and  hitched  my  little  go- 
cart  to  a  star,  and  the  star  turned  into 
a  meteor  and  is  now  whizzing  through 
space  getting  bigger  and  stronger  all 
the  time,  and  I  am  tied  on  to  the  end 
of  it  unable  to  stop  it  or  myself. 

If  I  only  had  more  sense  and  more 
ability,  think  what  I  might  have  done! 

The  work  at  the  hospital  is  still  very 
heavy.  The  wards  are  bare  and  re- 
217 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

pellant  and  the  days  are  long  and 
dreary  for  the  sick  men.  We  do  all 
we  can  to  cheer  them  up,  have  phon 
ograph  concerts,  magic  lantern  shows, 
with  the  magic  missing,  and  baby  or 
gan  recitals.  The  results  are  often 
ludicrous,  but  the  appreciation  of  the 
men  for  our  slightest  effort  is  so  hearty 
that  it  more  than  repays  us. 

I  saw  one  man  yesterday  who  had 
gone  crazy  on  the  battlefield.  He 
looked  like  a  terror  stricken  animal 
afraid  of  everybody,  and  hiding  under 
the  sheet  at  the  slightest  approach. 
When  I  came  in  he  cowered  back 
against  the  wall  shaking  from  head  to 
foot.  I  put  a  big  bunch  of  flowers  on 
the  bed,  and  in  a  flash  his  hands  were 
stretched  out  for  them,  and  a  smile 
came  to  his  lips.  After  that  whenever 
I  passed  the  door,  he  would  shout  out, 
218 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

< '  Arigato !  Arigato ! ' '  which  the  nurse 
said  was  the  first  sign  of  sanity  he 
had  shown. 

In  the  next  room  was  a  man  who  had 
fallen  from  a  mast  on  one  of  the  flag 
ships.  He  had  landed  full  on  his  face 
and  the  result  was  too  fearful  to  de 
scribe.  The  nurse  said  he  could  not  live 
through  the  night  so  I  laid  my  flowers 
on  his  bed  and  was  slipping  out  when 
he  called  to  me.  His  whole  head  was 
covered  with  bandages  except  his 
mouth  and  one  eye,  and  I  had  to  lean 
down  very  close  to  understand  what  he 
said.  What  do  you  suppose  he  wanted'? 
To  look  at  my  hat ! !  He  had  never  seen 
one  before  and  he  was  just  like  a  child 
in  his  curiosity. 

Of  course,  as  foreigners,  we  always 
excite  comment,  and  are  gazed  at,  ex 
amined  and  talked  about  continually; 
219 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

I  sometimes  feel  like  a  wild  animal  in 
a  cage  straight  from  the  heart  of 
Africa ! 

Our  unfailing  point  of  contact  is 
the  flowers.  You  cannot  imagine  how 
they  love  them.  I  have  seen  men  hold 
ing  them  tenderly  in  their  fingers  and 
talking  to  them  as  they  would  to  chil 
dren.  Imagine  retreating  soldiers  af 
ter  a  hard  day's  fight,  stopping  to  put 
a  flower  in  a  dead  comrade's  hand! 

Oh!  Mate,  the  most  comical  things 
and  the  most  tragic,  the  most  horrible 
and  the  most  beautiful  are  all  mixed 
up  together.  Every  time  I  go  to  the 
hospital  I  am  faced  with  my  wasted 
years  of  opportunities.  It  takes  so 
little  to  bring  sunshine  and  cheer,  and 
yet  millions  of  us  go  chasing  our  own 
little  desires  through  life,  and  never 
stop  to  think  of  the  ones  who  are  down. 

No,  I  am  not  going  to  turn  Mission- 
220 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

ary  nor  Salvation  Army  lassie,  but 
with  God's  help  I  shall  serve  some 
where  and  "good  cheer  for  the  lonely" 
shall  be  my  watch-word. 

I  am  lots  better  than  I  was,  though 
I  am  still  tussling  with  insomnia.  My 
crazy  nerves  play  me  all  sorts  of 
tricks,  but  praise  be  I  have  stopped 
worrying.  I  have  come  at  last  to  see 
that  God  has  found  even  a  small  bro 
ken  instrument  like  myself  worth  work 
ing  through,  and  I  just  lift  up  my 
heart  to  Him  every  day,  battered  and 
bruised  as  it  is,  in  deep  unspeakable 
thankfulness. 


HIEOSHIMA,  April,  1905. 
My  dearest  Mate: 

Your  letter  is  here  and  I  have  n't  a 
grain  of  sense,  nor  dignity,  nor  any- 
221 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

thing  else  except  a  wild  desire  to  hug 
everything  in  sight!  I  am  having  as 
many  thrills  as  a  surcharged  electric 
battery,  and  I  am  so  hysterically  happy 
that  I  don't  care  what  I  do  or  say. 

Why  did  n't  you  tell  me  at  first  it 
was  Dr.  Leet?  My  mind  was  so  full 
of  Jack  that  I  forgot  that  other  men 
inhabited  the  earth.  It  is  no  use  bluff 
ing  any  longer,  Mate,  there  has  never 
been  a  minute  since  the  train  pulled 
out  of  the  home  station  that  every  in 
stinct  in  me  has  n't  cried  out  for  Jack. 
Pride  kept  me  silent  at  first,  and  then 
the  miserable  thought  got  hold  of  me 
that  he  was  beginning  to  care  for  you. 
Oh !  the  agony  I  have  suffered,  trying 
to  be  loyal  to  you,  to  be  generous  to 
him,  and  to  put  myself  out  of  the  ques 
tion!  And  now  your  blessed  letter 
comes,  and  laughs  at  my  fears  and  says 
"Jack  chooses  his  wife  as  he  does  his 
friends,  for  eternity." 
222 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

I  have  no  words  to  fit  the  occasion, 
all  I  can  say  is  now  that  happiness  has 
shown  me  the  back  of  her  head  I  am 
scared  to  death  to  look  her  in  the  face. 
But  I  "shore  do"  like  the  arrange 
ment  of  her  back  hair. 

Don't  breathe  a  word  of  what  I  have 
written,  but  as  you-  love  me  find  out 
absolutely  and  beyond  all  possibility 
of  doubt  if  Jack  feels  exactly  as  he 
did  four  years  ago.  If  you  give  me 
your  word  of  honor  that  he  does, 
then— I  will  write. 

I  have  signed  a  contract  for  another 
year,  and  I  must  stay  it  out,  but  I 
would  spend  a  year  in  Hades  if 
Heaven  was  at  the  end  of  it. 

All  you  say  about  Dr.  Leet  fills  me 
with  joy.  He  does  not  need  any  higher 
commendation  in  this  world  nor  the 
next  than  that  you  are  willing  to 
marry  him!  Is  n't  it  dandy  that  he 
is  going  to  back  the  hospital  scheme? 
323 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

When  I  think  of  the  way  Jack  has 
worked  for  ten  years  without  a  vaca 
tion,  putting  all  his  magnificent  ability, 
his  strength,  his  youth,  his  health  even 
into  that  project,  I  don't  wonder  that 
men  like  Dr.  Leet  are  eager  to  put 
their  money  and  services  at  his  dis 
posal.  You  say  Dr.  Leet  does  it  upon 
the  condition  that  Jack  takes  a  rest. 
Make  him  stick  to  it,  Mate,  he  will  kill 
himself  if  he  is  n  't  stopped. 

I  have  read  your  letters  over  and 
over  and  traced  your  love  affair  every 
inch  of  the  way.  "Why  are  you  such 
an  old  clam?  To  think  that  I  am  the 
only  one  that  knows  your  secret,  and 
that  up  to  to-day  I  have  been  barking 
up  the  wrong  tree!  Never  mind,  I 
forgive  you,  I  forgive  everybody,  I  am 
drunk  with  happiness  and  generous  in 
con-sequence. 

My  little  old  lane  is  glorified,  even 
224 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

the  barbed  wire  fence  on  either  side 
scintillates.  The  house  is  too  small,  I 
am  going  out  on  the  River  Road,  and 
see  the  cherry  blossoms  on  the  hill 
sides  and  the  sunlight  on  the  water, 
and  feel  the  road  under  my  feet.  I 
feel  like  a  prospector  who  has  struck 
gold.  Whatever  comes  of  it  all,  for 
this  one  day  I  am  going  to  give  full 
rein  to  my  fancy  and  be  gloriously 
happy  once  more. 


HIROSHIMA,  May,  1905. 

There  is  a  big  yellow  bee,  doing  the 
buzzing  act  in  the  sunshine  on  my  win 
dow,  and  I  am  just  wondering  who  is 
doing  the  most  buzzing,  he  or  I?  His 
nose  is  yellow  with  pollen  from  some 
flower  he  has  robbed,  his  body  is  fat 
and  lazy,  all  in  all  he  is  about  the  hap 
piest  bee  I  ever  beheld.  But  I  can  go 

i5  225 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

him  one  better,  while  it  is  only  his 
wings  that  are  beating  with  happiness, 
it  is  my  heart  that  is  going  to  the  tune 
of  rag-time  jigs  and  triumphal  allelu 
ias  all  at  the  same  time. 

My  chef,  four  feet  two,  remarked 
this  morning  "Sensei  happy  all  same 
like  chicken!"  He  meant  bird,  but 
any  old  fowl  will  do. 

Oh !  Mate,  it  is  good  to  be  alive  these 
days.  For  weeks  we  have  had  nothing 
but  glorious  sunrises,  gorgeous  sun 
sets,  and  perfect  noondays.  The  wis 
taria  has  come  before  the  cherry  blos 
soms  have  quite  gone,  and  the  earth 
is  a  glow  of  purple  and  pink  with  the 
blue  sky  above  as  tender  as  love. 

Each  morning  I  open  my  windows 
to  the  east  to  see  the  marvel  of  a  new 
day  coming  fresh  from  the  hands  of 
its  Maker,  and  each  evening  I  stand 
at  the  opposite  window  and  watch  the 
226 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

same  day  drop  over  the  mountains  to 
eternity.  In  the  flaming  sky  where  so 
often  hangs  the  silver  crescent  is  al 
ways  the  promise  of  another  day,  an 
other  chance  to  begin  anew. 

Just  one  more  year  and  I  will  be 
turning  the  gladdest  face  homeward 
that  ever  a  lonely  pilgrim  faced  the 
West  with.  There  will  be  many  a  pang 
at  leaving  Japan,  I  have  learned  life's 
deepest  lesson  here,  and  the  loneliness 
and  isolation  that  have  been  so  hard 
to  bear  have  revealed  inner  depths  of 
which  I  never  dreamed  before.  What 
strange  things  human  beings  are !  Our 
very  crosses  get  dear  after  we  have 
carried  them  awhile ! 

I  have  had  three  offers  to  sign  fresh 
contracts,  Nagasaki,  Tokyo,  and  here, 
but  I  am  leaving  things  to  shape  them 
selves  for  the  future.  Whatever  hap 
pens  I  am  coming  home  first.  If  happi- 
227 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

ness  is  waiting  for  me,  I  '11  meet  it 
with  out-stretched  arms,  if  not  I  am 
coming  back  to  my  post.  Thank  God 
I  am  sure  of  myself  at  last! 

The  work  at  the  hospital  this  month 
is  much  lighter,  and  the  patients  are 
leaving  for  home  daily.  The  talk  of 
peace  is  in  the  air,  and  we  are  pray 
ing  with  all  our  hearts  that  it  may 
come.  Nobody  but  those  who  have 
seen  with  their  own  eyes  can  know  the 
unspeakable  horrors  of  this  war.  It  is 
not  only  those  who  are  fighting  at  the 
front  who  have  known  the  full  tragedy, 
it  is  those  also  who  are  fighting  at 
home  the  relentless  foe  of  poverty,  sick 
ness,  and  desolation.  If  victory  comes 
to  Japan,  half  the  glory  must  be  for 
those  silent  heroic  little  women,  who 
gave  their  all,  then  took  up  the  man's 
burden  and  cheerfully  bore  it  to  the 
end. 

228 


The   Lady  of  the  Decoration 

I  was  very  much  interested  in  your 
account  of  the  young  missionary  who 
is  coming  through  Japan  on  her  way 
to  China.  I  know  just  how  she  will  feel 
when  she  steps  off  the  steamer  and 
finds  no  friendly  face  to  welcome  her. 
I  talked  over  your  little  scheme  with 
Miss  Lessing  and  she  says  I  can  go 
up  to  Yokohama  in  July  to  meet  her 
and  bring  her  right  down  here.  Tell 
her  to  tie  her  handkerchief  around  her 
arm  so  I  will  know  her,  and  not  to 
worry  the  least  bit,  that  I  will  take 
care  of  her  and  treat  her  like  one  of 
my  own  family. 

Can  you  guess  how  eagerly  I  am 
waiting  for  your  answer  to  my  April 
letter?  It  cannot  come  before  the  last 
of  June,  and  happy  as  I  am,  the  time 
seems  very  long.  Yet  I  would  rather 
live  to  the  last  of  my  days  like  this, 
travelling  ever  toward  the  pot  of  gold 
229 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

at  the  end  of  the  rainbow,  than  ever 
to  arrive  and  find  the  gold  not  there! 
You  say  that  at  last  you  know  I  ain 
the  ' '  captain  of  my  soul. ' '  "Well,  Mate, 
I  believe  I  am,  but  I  just  want  to  say 
that  it  's  a  hard  worked  captain  that 
I  am,  and  if  anybody  wants  the  job — 
very  much — I  think  he  can  get  it. 


YOKOHAMA,  July  5,  1905. 

Do  you  suppose,  if  people  could,  they 
would  write  letters  as  soon  as  they 
got  to  Heaven  ?  I  don 't  know  where  to 
begin  nor  what  to  say.  The  only  thing 
about  me  that  is  on  earth  is  this  pen 
point,  the  rest  is  floating  around  in  a 
diamond-studded,  rose-colored  mist ! 

I  will  try  to  be  sensible  and  give  you 

some  idea  of  what  has  been  happening, 

but  how  I  am  to  get  it  on  paper  I  don 't 

know.    I  got  here  yesterday,  the  4th 

230 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

of  July,  on  the  early  train,  and  rushed 
down  to  the  hatoba  to  meet  the  launch 
when  it  came  in  from  the  steamer.  I 
had  had  no  breakfast  and  was  as  nerv 
ous  as  a  witch.  Your  letter  had  not 
come,  and  my  fears  were  increasing 
every  moment. 

Well  I  took  my  place  on  the  steps 
as  the  launch  landed  and  waited,  with 
very  little  interest  I  must  confess,  for 
your  young  missionary  to  appear.  By 
and  by  I  saw  a  handkerchief  tied  to 
a  sleeve,  but  it  was  a  man's  sleeve. 
I  gave  one  more  look,  and  my  heart 
seemed  to  stop.  "Jack!"  I  cried,  and 
then  everything  went  black  before  me, 
and  I  did  n't  know  anything  more.  It 
was  the  first  time  I  ever  fainted;  sor 
row  and  grief  never  knocked  me  out, 
but  joy  like  that  was  enough  to  kill  me ! 

When  I  came  to,  I  was  at  the  hotel 
and  I  did  n't  dare  open  my  eyes,  I 
231 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

knew  it  was  all  a  dream,  and  I  did 
not  want  to  come  back  to  reality.  I 
lay  there  holding  on  to  the  vision,  un 
til  I  heard  a  man's  voice  close  by  say, 
"She  will  be  all  right  now,  I  will  take 
care  of  her. ' '  Then  I  opened  my  eyes, 
and  with  three  Japanese  maids  and 
four  Japanese  men  and  two  ladies  off 
the  steamer  looking  on,  I  flung  my 
arms  about  Jack's  neck  and  cried  down 
his  collar! 

He  made  me  stay  quiet  all  morning, 
and  just  before  tiffin  he  calmly  in 
formed  me  that  he  had  made  all  the 
arrangements  for  us  to  be  married  at 
three  o'clock.  I  declared  I  could  n't, 
that  I  had  signed  a  contract  for  an 
other  year  at  Hiroshima,  that  Miss 
Lessing  would  think  I  was  crazy,  that 
I  must  make  some  plans.  But  you 
know  Jack!  He  met  every  objection 
232 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

that  I  could  offer,  said  lie  would  see 
Miss  Lessing  and  make  it  all  right 
about  the  contract,  that  I  was  too 
nervous  to  teach  any  more,  and  last 
that  I  owed  him  a  little  consideration 
after  four  years  of  waiting.  Then  I 
realized  how  the  lines  had  deepened  in 
his  face,  and  how  the  grey  was  streak 
ing  his  hair,  and  I  surrendered 
promptly. 

We  were  married  in  a  little  English 
church  on  the  Bluff,  with  half  a  dozen 
witnesses.  Several  Americans  whom 
Jack  had  met  on  the  steamer,  a  mis 
sionary  friend  of  mine,  and  the  Japan 
ese  clerk  constituted  the  audience. 

It  is  all  like  a  beautiful  dream  to 
me  still,  and  I  am  afraid  to  let  Jack 
get  out  of  my  sight  for  fear  I  will 
wake  up.  It  was  Fourth  of  July,  and 
Christmas,  and  birthday,  and  wedding 
233 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

day  all  rolled  into  one.  The  whole  city 
was  celebrating,  the  hotel  a  flutter  of 
flags  and  ribbons,  the  bay  full  of  every 
kind  of  pleasure  craft.  At  night  there 
was  a  grand  lantern  fete  and  fire 
works,  and  a  huge  figure  of  Uncle 
Sam  with  stars  in  his  coat  tails. 
Thousands  of  Japanese  in  their  gayest 
kimonas  thronged  the  Bund,  listening 
to  the  music,  watching  the  foreigners 
and  the  fire-works. 

Jack  and  I  were  like  two  children, 
he  forgot  that  he  was  a  staid  doctor, 
and  I  forgot  that  I  had  ever  been 
a  Foreign  Missionary  Kindergarten 
teacher.  We  were  boy  and  girl  again 
and  up  to  our  eyes  in  love.  It  was 
the  first  Fourth  of  July  for  fifteen 
years  that  I  did  not  have  some  unhap- 
piness  to  conceal.  As  one  of  my  girls 
said  about  herself:  "My  little  lonely 
heart  had  flewed  away ! ' ' 
234 


The  Lady  of  the  Decoration 

All  the  loneliness,  the  heartaches, 
the  pains  are  justified  now.  I  do  not 
regret  the  past  for  through  it  the 
present  is. 

Do  you  remember  the  lines:  "He 
shall  restore  the  years  that  the  locust 
hath  eaten?"  Well  I  believe  that 
while  I  have  been  struggling  out  here, 
He  has  restored  them,  and  that  I  will 
be  permitted  to  return  to  a  new  life, 
a  life  given  back  by  God. 

Of  course  you  know  we  are  going 
on  around.  It  seems  rather  inconsist 
ent  to  say  I  am  glad  of  it  after  all 
my  wailing  for  home.  The  truth  is, 
home  has  come  to  me  I 

Jack  says  we  are  to  meet  you  and 
Dr.  Leet  in  Paris.  You  need  n't  try 
to  persuade  me  that  Heaven  will  be 
any  better  than  the  present! 

There  is  no  use  in  my  trying  to 
thank  you  for  your  part  in  all  this, 
235 


dear  Mate.  I  have  been  in  a  chronic 
state  of  gratitude  to  you  ever  since  I 
was  born!  I  can  only  say  with  all  my 

heart  and  soul  "God  bless  you  and 
Good-bye. : 


5  > 


P.S.  In  my  wedding  ring  is  engraved 
M.L.O.T.D.  Can  you  guess  what  it 
means  ? 


236 


DATE  DUE 


A  /'N/'Nrt          """*'  'I  "I'll  llllllllll  ill  Hi 


